friends help: i’m a really shy person mainly due to fake friends and people who teased me in middle school. - Help.com

trusting someone is hard. overcoming shyness is not easy, it partially takes self confidence in yourself. you don’t have to trust people to overcome this. i don’t know how other than repeating it daily i have taught my kids to not focus on what other people say or think, because those people can’t live your life…only you can. i also made them do at least one sport a year cuz wether they did good or not they gave it their best effort showing them strength. i don’t know if that helped but that is how i got them to overcome shyness

oh…ive had plenty of fake friends, and plenty of people teased me in middle school and harrass me now that im in highschool. but rather than being shy, i figure..what do i have to lose by being myself? I’m loud, and have a big personality, and i have a lot of friends cause of it. A lot of people also make fun of me for it, but they’re gonna talk about me and try to hurt me whether im loud or not, so i figure i might as well have a good time.

Don’t worry about what others think. They’re likely retarded or demented or something similar. What kind of idiot doesn’t like shy people anyways?

Yeah. Been there too. Its very difficult to shake off the jr. high insecurity especially when you have been bullied and belittled. Believe me though - things get better! You eventually come into your own and start to accept yourself for who you are - especially as you get older. People who like you for who you are are the ones you want to keep or hang on to as friends. They are soooo worth it. If he is that kind of guy he will look beyond your shyness, take the time to really get to know you and appreciate you for all of your wonderful qualities. Its really not worth it trying to pretend to be someone you aren’t even if you might like someone else or have a crush. I’ve done that and its a learning experience that I experienced and re-experienced many times over. Its uncomfortable being with people who have expectations of you either because of their own insecurities or because they have something to prove. It was never worth it to me. And eventually I did meet people who weren’t superficial friends because the issue of my being shy or sensitive didn’t matter to them at all. In fact they didn’t notice it!

I used to write in my journal, observe others I admired having conversations and even sometimes talk to myself while I was alone as practice, but ultimately getting over shyness comes with wonderful, accepting friendships and caring people who encourage and support you - people who like you the way you are and don’t expect you to behave any differently. As the above mentioned just be true to yourself and take your time getting to know others who share your interests and comfort level. :)

Hey, I’ve had your same problem for a very long time. Except I was never teased or anything (I’ve experienced the fake friends though. I’ve never been able to hold conversation with a stranger, I’ve never been able to talk in a group, I’ve never been about to go to parties (because of my shyness), I’ve never been able to have “fun” that everyone else have because of the shyness.

But like you recently since i started college I needed to come out of my shell and someone told me that get a penpal over the internet and start from there.

I got a penpal 3 days ago, we have exchange a few emails and today. I held a conversation with 2 complete stranger in the mall today. Although I was nervous, I think talking to the penpal (some how boosted my confidence). After that conversation with complete strangers I felt great like I never have before.

try getting a penpal or something because with penpal you two discuss your strengths with each other and that will boost your confidence about your self.

(i hope that made sense)

hey ive had the same crap and whatnot, yadda yadda highschool, crap friends and popularity blah blah blah… the long and short is i decided not to give a crap about what people think of me and now im free to be myself, honestly who’s opinions matter about who you are other than your own? and on the trust issue hey the only person you can trust %100 is yourself, a true friend is one in a million so its no surprise you’ve had so many “fake friends” or acquaintances. if you like this guy then be yourself around him hey even be forward and ask him out? guys like a confident girl my advice is be yourself and go get him.

thank you sooooo much i will eally take your advice to heart!!!