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How to annoy people in a mall.

Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out of the reflecting pond.
Try pants on backwards at the Grap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big.
At the bottom of an escalator, scream “My SHOELACES! AAAGH!”
Teach pet store parrots new vocabulary that makes them unsalable.
Ask a salesman why a particular TV is labeled black and white and insist that it’s a color set. When he disagrees, give him a strange look and say, “You mean you really can’t see it?”
If you’re patient, stare intently into a surveillance camera for an hour while rocking from side to side.
Ask for red-tinted lenses at the optometrist.
Sneak up on saleswomen at the perfume counter and spray *them* with your own bottle of Eau de Swanke.
Ask a saleswoman whether a particular shade of panties matches the color of your beard.
Change every TV in the electronics department to a station showing “Saved by the Bell”.
Chant the dialogue in a robotic voice, and scream if anyone tries to switch channels on one of the sets.
Hang out in the waterbed section of the furniture department wearing a Navy uniform. Occasionally run around in circles yelling “scratch one flat top!”
Walk up the skinniest stairs in the mall with your arms out not letting anyone pass and walkin really slow. And any time someone is near yell.
Find one of the huge boom-boxes and turn it to some rock station. Then, turn it off and turn the volume all the way up. Then the next person to check it out will have great fun!
Set all of the alarm clocks in any of the Bed & Bath stores to go off every ten minutes on the loudest setting possible.
Bring survial gear and “live” in one of the tents in a camping shops. Scream “Help” & “We’re under fire” every 5 mins. Make battle noises as well!
Stand in front of the Gap. “Fall” in repeatedly. Threaten legal action.
When ever someone makes an annoncment over the loud speakers cover your ears and scream “The voices…the voices…make them stop”