Love help: so im kinda lost right now, my boyfriend and i have been together - Help.com

so im kinda lost right now, my boyfriend and i have

been together for over a year now and he all of a sudden stopped calling me pet names (you know babe, baby, beautiful etc.) and i cant figure out why. so i asked him, and he told me that is makes him feel uncomfortable to call me those names… he also is “working” all the time so we never have anytime together, im starting to think he wants out of this relationship but i do really love him and im scared to end it. cuz if that isnt the case then ive lost him. i dont know if im being selfish or wrong by wanting to spend time with him and wanting to him to call me those names. he said that all this “isnt a big deal” and that i need to “just relax and let it happen” but i feel really insecure in our relationship that its hard for me to relax. i just dont know what to do. we fight all the time because i want answers to my questions and it just “doesnt matter” to him… what should i do?

This open post was written 1 year, 1 month ago | V/U/S: 211, 3, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post racegirl may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. racegirl is a verified member, has been around for 2 years, 10 months and has 9 posts and 34 replies to their name.

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Love, infant, pet, matter, Name, question, Big, boyfriend, selfishness, Answer, Relationships (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (3)

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Anonymous #
1 year, 1 month ago (13 minutes after post)

Find someone who wouldnt mind expressing themselves to you. Believe me you will feel way more secure in your relationship. I dont think you are being selfish at all.

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Amethysteria offline Verified User (2 years, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (58 minutes after post)

To be honest, I am in the same situation (only I’ve just been dating this person for half a year) and the attachment is tough to leave behind. If you feel you can find happiness among other things while your boyfriend is so busy, then do so. Get out there! Get involved! If he really wants to move on from you, he will most likely tell you (unless he is emotionally too weak to do so himself).
Just gently remind him every now and then of how important he is to you! Sometimes fights are good so that you can release your emotions, but since you have already fought over this, try to approach it diplomatically while showing that you support him.
And ask him how important the relationship is to him because of what it means to you. If it isn’t his priority as much as it is yours, though, you will have to move on.
Good luck!

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joloone offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (17 hours, 9 minutes after post)

i always say your honest with yourself.

If you can see that the relationship isnt what you want it to be then talk to the other person.
If you dont like what you hear then your best to leave that relationship and move on.
As time goes on you might look back and see mistakes youve made, the trick is to learn from it.

Ive found in my life, that diffrent people are right for you at diffrent times in your life.

But take heart, life is like a book, with many pages and many chapters, even if this relationship doesnt work out im sure there is plenty of pages left in your book for you to meet someone new, who you are perhaps more “in tune” with emotionally.
Sometimes the best things are the hardest to do

But remeber, youll never meet somone who is 100% suitable for you, youll get 95% at best, the other 5% is the give and take bit, the bit you have to tolerate.

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