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im listening

Yeah this is great when you’re just in a very unhappy mood, just let it all out, rant, whatever. Ask for help solving your problems? Just do whatever!

i’m not suicidal first of all. just really sad. i’m a 19 and a college student, so of course my issues have to revolve around a boy.
we met at the beginning of the semester and have been hanging out quite a bit. he kept mentioning that he would like to possibly move our friendship up to the next level. i of course, playing hard to get, kept denying him and we just went on as really good friends. a few nights ago, however, we both were really drunk at a party and ended up going back to his place and i’m guessing you can fill in the blanks from there… now its been four days and i haven’t seen him and the few times i’ve talked to him on AIM his kept it really short.
the problem is that now i have realized that perhaps i do want to make things more serious, while he seems to have lost all interest.
i am so stupid. i really regret that night. i just don’t know what to do. move on? i don’t really want to. but i don’t know… i’m just so miserable. any advice?
- written 3 minutes ago

Being unhappy is unattractive firstly. Secondly being so young mental games will be involved so be ready for anything almost, you will both make what you see as mistakes. By giving yourself to him he has either got what he wanted from you or is nervous and unsure how to be with you now in light of the new position you are both in…Friends then lovers requires adaptation. Dont try to force him to do anything. Flirt with him but let him feel free to make the choice to be with you. Don’t put too many expectations on him. A simple I would like to see where this could go leaves lots of unanswered questions, that he may wish to fill in. You want to get to know him better and are flexible to comprimise then there is potential. Stroke his ego, tell him he was great and that things can only get better, give him reason to be proud and boast. Tell him your scared of being hurt but know thats is not his responsibility.

Don’t say you regret it either. Life gives you choices, learn to live with your decision. Not all paths go the places you want.

Im a 20year old male and from my perspective through my number of relationships including being engaged, from a young person’s perspectives having a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship at our age is quite serious in ways and can be really emotional. I’d say that after spending a night with someone it’s pretty natural to have more desire for that person and it makes you feel connected, thus giving you more attatchment. If you like the guy why not make it clear because alot of the time girl’s hold on the backfoot in terms of instigating a relationship in my opinion and there’s no need to. You don’t know he might feel the exact same as you.