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Honey, you don’t have to rely upon a boy to give you the love you so desparately are seeking. There is one who loves you more than you will ever know. He created you and knows your beginning and your end. He always has good thoughts of you to bring you to your expected end. He said that he would never leave your or forsake you that he would be with you always, even until the end of time. Now who wouldn’t want a love like that? Sweetie, his name is Jesus and he is God. He loves you so much that he died for you. He died for you so that you wouldn’t have to think about hurting yourself. He died for you so that you can have the victory over all things in this life that will hurt you. He died for you so that you can know how much he loves you. He said that if you believe that he died for you then you will have life everlasting. He said that one day all your tears would be wiped away and that you would have joy. the Joy of the Lord is your strengh. Trust and believe in the Name of Jesus. Call on him when you feel alone or confused and he will answer you. He’s waiting for you to talk to him.

what do you mean where am I. That doesn’t matter. Just know that Jesus loves you.

Have you told him that you want to take things to the next level? Maybe he feels guilty for taking advantage of you while you were drunk or something so he is shying away? I would suggest talking to him face to face, not over aim. He won’t be able to escape you so easily and you will be able to read his reactions while you are talking.

that’s good advice, but i’m far too much of a chicken… i really don’t want to be rejected.
he’s a few years older then me, so he probably thinks that i am rediculously immature. we’ve just sort of been pretending that nothing ever happened, which is fine with me because i’d much rather that it never had, but i really wish we could go back to hanging out like before or even more so, just anything but this sudden cut off.

Regardless of what you want, you still need to talk to him if you want anything to be resolved. You can either fight for what you want and walk away knowing you tried everything you could, or you might just end up being left with a huge gaping hole full of regret for never trying. And I know that feeling. It is horrible to live with. The choice is yours, if you want him then go get him. If you just wanna hang out, then do what you can to make that happen.

but i don’t want to come on too strong, you know, chase him away… i don’t want him to think that i took what happened a few nights ago to mean something else then what it actually was. so should i at least wait a few days? see if he makes any moves first? the last thing i would want it to pursue and be rejected… or come off looking like i’m obsessive or something. ahh i don’t know what to do…
for example, he’s online right now and he has been a few times before today and the past couple of days. before this past friday, i would sign on and i’d instantly have an IM from him. now nothing. he is done with me isn’t he?

i find, that in these sort of situations, the best thing to do is go with what you think is right and if that doesn’t work out well, it might not be meant to be. i agree with burger….thing. he might feel guilty and you should let him know that you’re ok and maybe want to continue this relationship

He isn’t done with you till you tell him he’s done with you :-p. You cannot know such things without talking to him. Stop making so many assumptions and getting yourself worked up over nothing. Just do what you gotta do to make yourself feel better. If you are rejected, so what? There are far worse things in the world. In this case it would be a gift for you. You’d know it was over for sure then so you could finally just move on with your life and get over it. Without knowing for sure, it will torture you and eat at you.

I concur

I think the best thing you can do at this point and ask him if he wants to hang out. Have a nice casual time and see how things go. Go with the flow. If you feel comfortable enough talking to him about your feelings, then go for it. If not then give it some time to grow. Get to know him more and start to send him some more positive signals about where you want the relationship to go. If he doesn’t even wanna hang out, then at least you know. But give him a little time to come around. If he says he is busy, try for some other time. If he keeps rejecting you, it is time to move on.

I must go. Good luck to you anon!

ohh gosh… i’m such a nervous wreck!!! i wish it was as easy as you make it sound, thank you so much for listening to my ranting… you’re right, i should wait a bit… i mean, its been less then 4 days at this point and i’m sure i’m just being super over sensative. i mean, there have probably been times before this that he hasn’t been around as often, and i just didn’t even notice. i should wait it out a bit, and see if he tries to make plans with me i think, like ‘the good old days’ lol and if he totally ignores me, well i guess i was just used and need to move on…
from a guy’s perspective, if any of you are guys, that is, how long should i wait and see if there is still potential? like if i hear nothing back from him in a week is about time to call it quits? what do you think??

i am a guy so from my perspective, we guys are pretty inept at these sorta things so to tell you the truth, it could take a good month before he would feel confertable with talking to you seriously after something with this so don’t feel discouraged if it takes longer than you originally thought

a month? oh boy…
okay, well here might be an absolute deal breaker, i didn’t mention it before but the night in question was pretty terrible, if you know what i’m saying… and i may have said something to that extent at the time… i was pretty much as drunk as you can get though, so i don’t really remember that much… but yea… i probably crushed his ego and he never wants to see me again… :o(

Na, that wouldn’t be a deal breaker–not for me anyway. That does explain why he might feel a bit uncomfortable around you. The best thing for the both of you is to be able to sit down one day and laugh about this. But first you might want to consider apologizing for what was said. And even if you were to make fun of yourself in the situation and it will leave an opening for him to loosen up too.

I would wait a week at the most. Considering that you are at least talking on aim is a good start and he is likely to see that as having made contact after the ‘fateful night.’ What you both need is to get together in a casual situation, try to have some fun like you’ve been doing, and maybe even talk things out when the opportunity arises. If he doesn’t initiate something, you should.

okay, okay… so i’m just going to chill for now. wait a few days… see if he suggests getting together, and if not, i’ll suggest something after like a week… sounds like a plan. i can do that, i just really don’t want to seem too clingy and all that, you know what i mean? i’ll let you know how things progress, one way or the other, if you’d like. thanks for the advice, i really appreciate it.

Yes, I’d be glad to hear how things progress. Take care and good luck :)

Talk to him. If he is not interested do not stress yourself. They is somebody that is out there that will to find mine so do not give up.

so things are not going to work out. he just randomly started dating some other girl. the past two weeks we still kinda sorta hung out, but it just wasn’t the same i guess. this came as quite the surprise though. i feel just mad and sick and used and i can’t sleep. im a mess.

I am very sorry to hear that. I know it hurts now but it will pass. You are quite obviously a very sweet and kind person and you will meet someone who treats you the way you deserve.

you don’t even know… i feel like i’m going to cry/ throw up. i feel so so so bad. i want to just die.

Whoa now, there’ll be none of that. You’re not going to die; this isn’t going to kill you. I do know the feeling of what it is to be used and abandoned like that. But you can’t let that become a part of who you are. Everyone has regrets and makes mistakes, but the smart ones learn from them. Get out with some friends and have some fun. You will find yourself slowly forgetting about this guy. You can and will get past this. You just gotta pick yourself up and keep going. You can do it.

no, actually, i think i’m just destined to be alone forever. which just really isn’t fair.

That is a very, very common feeling. Life doesn’t follow our plans. It typically falls into place when we’re not looking for it to. You can’t plan your life, but you can plan to be surprised. No, life isn’t always fair, but it is what we make of it.