boyfriend help: Me and my friend used to be together all the time and now all - Help.com

iknowudigginm
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Me and my friend used to be together all the time and now all of a sudden…

now that her and her boyfriend are on good terms again, she doesn’t spend any time with me anymore. She hardly even calls anymore. And when I call her she doesn’t answer the phone. One night I called her and it went straight to her voice mail so I left a voice message saying that I was just checking on her and asked her to call when she got the message and she never did. I called her a few days later and she still didn’t answer so I started thinking that maybe something was wrong. Then almost a week later she calls me and acts as if everything is cool but I’m mad as hell and hurt because I feel that she’s neglecting our friendship. Do you guys think I’m right for feeling this way or do you think I’m overreacting and should be happy that her and her boyfriend are on good terms again?

This open post was written 1 year ago | V/U/S: 496, 6, 6 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post iknowudigginm may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. iknowudigginm is a verified member, has been around for 1 year, 3 months and has 11 posts and 19 replies to their name.

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wil offline Verified User (2 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (5 minutes after post)

You are right to feel hurt, but not necessarily mad at her. You must understand that there may have been a good reason for her not calling her.
Once you get the opportunity to talk to her, I would ask her why she wasn’t able to call and that you felt neglecting because she didn’t give you a reason for not calling. It wouldn’t hurt to also mention that you are glad that her relationship with her boyfriend is going well but you feel like she don’t have time for you anymore.
It is good to say ‘makes me feel’, don’t accuse her of being neglectful else you might offend her.
best of luck :)

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skyy offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (6 minutes after post)

Yeah this is really common. You have to build yourself a tough skin because you will see your friends act like this all the time esp in the future. Get use to being by yourself and not having a problem with it. Also make new friends so you wont feel so lonely. I mean think about it once you get a boyfriend you are going to want to be with him all the time and when you arent with him but with your friends you are going to wish you were. Girls have girlfriends to fill that void they have of not having a man or lover in their life. So whenever he do come around they slowly drift away and soon you start to realize you havent even seen them in a whole week. Dont get mad at her or make her feel guilty. But if it is bothering you you could tell her to not avoid your phone calls and expect you to go on like everythings cool.

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Anonymous #
1 year ago (1 hour, 8 minutes after post)

I got bad news for you. She don’t care about your friendship any more. Some day, after her boyfriend dumps her, she’ll come sniveling back looking for your support. Until then, you’re on your own sister.

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Anonymous #
1 year ago (2 hours, 54 minutes after post)

I think your friend’s neglected your friendship and support to her. I’m not trying to say bad things about your friend, but still, she really needs some additude fix.

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tezcl offline Verified User (2 months, 1 week) Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (10 months, 1 week after post)

I have the EXACT same problem with my friend. We used to be best friends and then all of a sudden she got a boyfriend and now completely neglects me. She used to call me almost every other day and now I’m lucky if she calls me once every two weeks. I feel like I was simply being used to fill her emotional void, because now that she has a boyfriend she completely neglects me. I guess I am jealous of her boyfriend, but I just think it’s unfair that I gave so much in terms of our friendship and now we act like total strangers.

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iknowudigginm offline Verified User (1 year, 3 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 3 weeks ago (10 months, 3 weeks after post)

And what has happened since then is that her and her boyfriend are at odds again and now she’s back to calling me everyday and wanting to hang out. It sucks that she only wants to be my friend when he’s not available

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