Love help: I guess my name’s Kat. - Help.com

I guess my name’s Kat.

Just to start you off. I’m only 15 years old and people tend to think of that a a very naive age. I’ve been a little out of sorts these days, going through my second year of high school and all. I came to a realization that no one I know, actually knows who I am. So here’s the story.
I live in a small town in Ohio that doesn’t exist on the map. Small town, small minds. People are conservative in this town.
Over the summer I started to realize how small this town actually is and that I didn’t really have friends. So I told myself, I going to prove to people that I can dwhatever the hell I want and not give a ****. AND so I do. And people have gotten used to it, in fact, people actually like it a lot. They look up to me and want to dress like me. I just recently made really good friends, and I look forward to school now.
But of course, there’s the stupid bullcrap called high school relationships!
I’ve never been in a relationship, not a real one at least. I was in one for like a month last year, but we never actually did anything. He broke up with me because I neglected him.

So now. There’s this guy that everyone said likes me. He thinks I’m goreous, he loves that I am alternative. He’s pretty punk with piercings and stuff. So I talk to him. I gave him my number, and for the last week, we’ve been getting to know eachother. We’ve only talked on the phone twice. The first time I was really awkward and quiet. The second time, I was awkward and hyped up on caffeine.
He’s aked me a lot of questions. Like, what do I like to do?.. Or What kind of music do I like?.. I always say “I don’t know” But of course I know.
So that’s my problem. I don’t trust people, especially after knowing them for a week. I’m not going to jump right on out and say “Oh my god! I love the Killers and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I write stories in my journal. I want to be a famous film director.”
In the past, I’ve told people these things and always get made fun of and put down. It’s ridiculous.
So this guy has been a total sweetheart to me. And he’s actually good looking. But he just broke up with one of my friends.
So my friend (not the one he broke up with),she tells me today that he really wants to be with me bla bla. BUT he also wants to be with the girl he broke up with recently sometime in the near future. (in fact I think they got back together tonight). Anywho. I’m not like that. I’m not dramatic, and don’t give my heart and soul to people. He wants to be with me, he’s with me. I don’t want to be the girl he dates just for fun.
So that’s what I’m having problems with.
Also, I’m really weird, out there. I kinda of have a weird sense of humor, and am artistically weird. And people find that I can take things seriously, but I don’t want to take things seriously because I don’t like when people know my personaliy, because they use it against me. Also, I find that people take high school way to seriously, and none of it matters, except your grades.
Doesn’t anyone else feel like this?

This open post was written 1 year ago | V/U/S: 160, 3, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

friends, Caffeine, Ohio, Soul, music, god, Film, number, Mind, Love (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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