Ok, so I need some serious help.
I’ve always had trouble making friends, and fitting in. But a year or two ago, I met a girl who was happy to be my friend. Soon she and her best friend became my two only friends. But then I started realizing how terrible life with them is. I realized that they’re just using me to copy my work, because I’ll do what they want me to, because they’re all I have, and that in general I can be their personal punching bag in pretty much every sense of the word.
But when I’m with them, I just feel like their babysitter. I guess I should point out that they both have ‘issues’. I don’t know exactly what they have, but they are in mainly special ed classes and have serious mental issues.
They abuse me in many ways. Physically, emotionally, mentally, etc.
They insult how I look and how I dress.
They act like freakin five year olds in the one or two normal people classes they are allowed in, one of which is one of my classes. They constantly embarass me because everybody just assumes that I have problems too because I hang out with them. They yell out things, call the aide that is assigned to them over to where we are sitting constantly, copy my work, make weird noises while the teacher is talking, do weird things like pinching my thighs (which they do all the time even though it is really awkward and uncomfortable and painful) or shoving me so I say “ow” or something and then get in trouble, etc.
They also hurt me physically sometimes just for the fun of it.
They take any expensive stuff I have and won’t give it back when I tell them to, and throw it around, and gave my cell number to the one girl’s creepy brother, and stuff like that.
They follow me EVERYWHERE. Even when I just want to be alone because I’m upset or go to the bathroom and deal with feminine issues or times like that.
They find out which guys I like and then tell everybody
They copy everything I do like 1st graders. Like, I have all of these funny/emo/ironic posters and printouts on my locker because I’m kind of emo/scene (which of course they don’t get)
Like, I have all of these Pon and Zi comics and the one girl doesn’t even get them or anything but she made me print them all ot for her just so she can copy me.
She said to do it or she’d kill me. EVen though she was joking, I never know with her cuz she has huge issues.
They also copy alot of my other work, like homework or my drawings. I feel like I can’t be an individual around them.
They also have scared alot of the boys I like away from me, and pissed off alot of people so now it’s awkward for ME to be around them when I didn’t do anything, besides associate with them.
I really want to get away from them, but I feel really bad for them and I don
t fit in with anybody at my school.
well, there’s one girl who had a huge fight with and her parents got involved with my parents, so now she has, like, a restraining order from me and we’re technically not allowed to be friends, but lately I started talking to her again and she kinda keeps me sane, because she’s kinda in the same situatuin with them, although not as bad because everybody knows she hates them and so do they but she hangs around them and they hang round her because we all basically know that we’re all we have, however crappy it may be.
(and I know you’re probably thinking that I should just tell my parents to screw that because I want to hang out with her again, but the truth is I kinda like only hanging out with her at school…)
So yeah, I vent to her alot whenever I can get away from them which generally forces me to skip classes and stuff to talk with her…she’s the only one who knows. Even my parents think that everything is going great for me. But there’s no way in hell I can tell them. They never help.
Plus, all of my anger at them has made me really irritable/depressed when I get home, too
It has driven me to go online and start talking to people and being emo secretly online.
So, long story short, I don’t know what to do about them. Plus, now I’m just in middle school but I’m scared to death of high school and having no friends in it, and yeah…
and please please please nobody tell me to “just make more friends.” I’ve tried. but It never works for me.
I’m just kinda offbeat and my town is…well, onbeat, i guess…I’m pretty much the only person who’s goal in life has nothing to do with becomng a cheerleader and then becoming a soccer mom…
~Charlii-Party~
~Shie~