life help: I am 33 and I’ve been married for 10 years and have 3 children. - Help.com

I am 33 and I’ve been married for 10 years and have 3 children.

My husband and I have hit a rough patch in our marriage and he’s not sure he wants to deal with it anymore and he’s considering leaving me. Here’s the story: I have trouble with emotional outbursts. These seem to always come up at the worst times: like in front of other people. When we first got together I was a lot worse, I was really bad at snapping and barking at him for no reason. Then 3 years ago we had a blow up and I sought help and was diagnosed with depression (which I’ve been taking medication for since then) and I see a counselor about monthly. In the last 3 years I’ve really improved. We’ve only had a few times that this issue has reared its ugly head. The other times we deal with normal marriage stuff, but it’s mostly good. I have determined that my main trigger is stress. I notice I have a really rough time in the fall when we go from sunny weather to lots of rain (I live in Washington State). That’s also back to school, back to sports time. We own our own company. So, the stress is too high. Anyway, a few weeks ago I came home from the gym and my hubby was on the couch watching the game and drinking beer with the neighbor and he hadn’t done some last clean up in the kitchen like I had asked before I left. Now, I know that it’s not a big deal. But I for some reason felt like I had to then take care of it. I was grumbling about it and he asked me my problem. I griped at him, he said he didn’t hear me asking him about the dished, I spouted off something else and then left the room and went upstairs. Anyway, the next day I was also pissy and I didn’t apologize until the following day. Now its 3 weeks later and he’s gotten angrier and angrier. He is totally embarrassed that I did this in front of the neighbor (I was too, so I apologized to him also). He also feels that I have no respect for him. His feelings are deeply hurt and he doesn’t think he can handle anymore of this issue. I am heartbroken. I have tried so hard to improve myself and curb my tongue. I have improved and I want my family and him in my life. I am not ready to give up. I want to know about how to get more help about change. How can I rid myself of this behavior and get better results? What else can/should I do?

This open post was written 1 year ago | V/U/S: 187, 5, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

Washington, beer, marriage, state, tongue, Emotion, Kitchen, game, life, sport (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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