Person help: Do you believe that counselling changes the way that a person lives or thinks? - Help.com

littlenick wrote:
I think it’s a counselor’s job to try to pry into the human mind to see if it can be changed or help the person change so they become better. Are you saying that somebody is changing you for the worse?

My mother had been counselling for serious matters all these years and after 17 years she has a job, and a life… But I can see on her that she’s much diffirent and trying to be “bossy” without being her type.

Also other people I know with long-term counselling have the tendency to seem like they are purely negative with the problems in their lives… I dont know if I put it right :-)

optimismiles wrote:
depends the counselor and the counselee.it definitely can.

Do you believe that it is right for a counselor to do that? I really want someone to attend to, but I am really afraid that he/she wont stick only to listening, and start to make me feel bad about myself. And 3 other counsellors I ve been with, they said that its nothing wrong with me, (I was 16) and they both been wrong because I couldnt trust them. If someone does or tries that with me, you believe I should go away and find someone else?

Namaste` wrote:
I dont think its about tricking peoples minds. I believe in teaching emotional intellegence. If councelling is carried out in a correct manner it would be done in a way that explains to the patient that there are ways to think to transend fear. CBT and other therapy would help the patient become more open minded and therefore beable to deal with day to day life better. Personal development is a huge subject, councelling is only one aspect of this. Unfortunately there is no quick fix and even after visits to a councellor the patient is required to continue with personal development to ensure they dont slip into their old ways of thinking. Some speakers talk of removing weeds from the mind and replacing them with flowers, as we know weeds grow freely and flowers need nurturing.

I know that very well. I am already deep in those aspects, but I feel very uncomfy if they start to change me, or my type of thinking. Its like killing my thoughts, while the only thing I need is someone to listen..

zephyr wrote:
It does, it is like a person is tyring to help you get out of the trobles that you are facing while you are struggling on how to overcome them.
I used to go to the school conselor for help when there is one. Even though it didn’t help me too much, at least i feel someone is with me and somehow braver and stronger.

Yeah but what about if I dont want to change, If I already know my problems (most of em) and I just want to open my heart only?

I need a listener not a helper; Should I state that to the person that I might attend?

zephyr wrote:
it seems like i missunderstood your question…Let me reanswer it.The counselors are just like psychologists, they have lots of stresses, they are facing different patitents everyday and they are not allowed to tell their patients secrects. They are the professional listener and once they got overloaded, they will change.I believe it is stress that changes your mother, not her profession, technically.

She ’s not a pro, she is just very deep in counselling, she has changed many psychiatrists and for 20 years she was in battle with her ppl around her… And to rephrase my answer :\ I believed this state changed her to something very tough and calm outside but inside her she’s still fragile; she just can walk alone again without help… But the shrink changed her type of thinking dunno, my mother was just an example :D

Cell wrote:
If you just want someone to listen why not get a friend instead, they’re free.

You wouldnt say that when all of your friends betrayed you and you have nobody to speak to

wolfsilverwolf wrote:
Speaking as a psychology student myself, I can tell you that any therapist caught trying to “trick peoples’ minds” would be severely reprimanded for it. The point of counseling isn’t to force an agenda on somebody else, the point is to help the person deal with factors limiting their success in life using healthy methods.

Sometimes therapy can be used as a mask to try and seem healthier for the experience, sometimes therapy is actually taken to heart and results in actual change. Whichever this turns out to be in the end depends largely on why the patient has sought counseling in the first place. Same people genuinely want to change the way they think about themselves while other only come for the sake of protecting their own affairs. The best therapists can do is assume people are there for the former and help the patients to the best of their abilities.

Which isn’t to say that the blame lies exclusively on the patients. It is the therapists that have a responsibility to be as objective as possible when dealing with a patient. This means they can’t be too close as friends nor attempt to make enemies, as either of these two extremes can significantly affect the therapist-patient relationship. Above all, a therapist must NEVER trick a patient. It is the right of the patient to know exactly what the treatments being administered will do to the patient and also the right to refuse any treatment offered (unless not being treated will cause immediate harm to the patient or others, but this is much rarer than you may think).

Thank you :)) Your answer covers me very much; and I am glad because is told by a psychology student, thank you again!

Sigurrós wrote:
If I say “dear doc, I want you to help me trick my mind - so I can deal with my life” it’s my choice. A councelor, therapist, psychologist or psychiatrist should never try to trick or force anything upon me that I do not want. It’s just wrong.

Cell wrote:
If you just want someone to listen why not get a friend instead, they’re free.

There are some things that are just better not tell friends, I like keeping friends and not using them. Problem is sometimes I don’t fully realise the impact of what I am saying.. friends aren’t trained to handle psychological issues.

A) So you believe that the therapist should be a viewer and not a person that will try to trick your mind to mask your problems, or to mislead the patient; So I guess you will agree if someone attends to a psychologist that will try something similar to go away from him and try someone else instead…

B) Yes, the friends cant handle psychological issues, they are not trained for that and many times friends cannot understand us fully.