he have nother girlfriend. i sorry to say but i have psychic feeling. also you should figure out this after 3 months. he keep you on side.
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I don’t know what to say. I know how it feels like. The fact he’s hiding it, is worse than what he’s doing. I think it’s weird that he chooses his friends over you, though. Who would you choose? =/ It’s important to spend time with friends, but the same goes for the girlfriend.
http://help.com/post/219350-i-have-a-…
I know he’s not cheating. That’s the one thing I’m very sure of.
He is keeping me on the side, but I’m on the side of his busy life.
Thankyou for understanding. I would definetly always choose him first. We’ve been togethor for over two years so there have been times when he’s put me first and put me second, but I thought we were finally coming to the point where we were in a mature relationship…only to find out..i guess i’m the only one thinking so
How old are you guys may I ask? He sounds like someone very young. If that is the case, it is natural to have his buddies first in his life. If he is older than he is immature.
he not chesting then maybe he a gay. then he not right for you. you go find nice guy who not ignore you. not your fault he gay with friend.
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He’s 20, and I’m 19. Our bdays are in January though.
We started dating when I was 17 and he was 18.
lol, I’ve accused him of being gay, sometimes I call his bestfriend his boyfriend.
He’s not, though. That’s another thing I’m sure of.
Twiggy, there is nothing to worry about. Give him time to be with his buddies. Boys at that age want to be in a wolf pack if you know what I mean and it doesn’t mean he is cheating or doesn’t want you. He has to do boy things and relationships are not number one yet in their lives. In the contrary, we women are much more mature at age 19. You too, should have friends to go out with more often and don’t wait around for him to make time for you. Enjoy life.
Thankyou beatricegalant. That was very helpful.
Twiggy, you have to give him the time you need and i guarentee he is giving you time, and you know even if he is hiding something from you maybe its important to him or doesnt want to make you think your being left out of anything. You know even if he is ready for you maybe he’s not, but dont wait around for him if you think he is taking to long and hasn’t done much with you, you shouldnt keep waiting, find someobdy else maybe he’s just not for you.
Yeah thanks. And that is one of my problems. It’s hard for me to wait. Plus, I’ve been having hard times with friends lately, so I’m fairly lonely. I know it’s not his responsibility to be with me every second of the day…I’m just asking for maybe 2 a week.
We’re in college and so we’re both busy with homework, so thats why it bothers me that he makes time for his friend and not me.
girl please. you cry right now where is he? go find real man. he waste your time. he not care. he think about friend. maybe do something gay.
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well, right now he’s about to take a math test.
lol
well twiggy, maybe you could ask him to go on a study date with you or something, jsut ask him if he wants to get a coffee just something simple like that.
Twiggy, just give yourselves time to do what you want to do. For him it means to be with his buddies and doing boy things. Tell him you’d like to go out just the two of you at least once every couple of weeks. Have you told him this yet?
Yeah, I have. He kind of cycles back and forth between being with his friends alot and being with me. Right now he’s just got so much school work with finals coming up.
Let’s see.. we haven’t gone out since last monday…and I guess it really bothers me that we were supposed to go out tomorrow, but he got busy so I have to wait until Monday to see him…because I have plans this weekend.
So try to plan something together when school will be out for Christmas in December. Young men don’t like schedules, it reminds them of school and they want to do what they want to do. His plans do include you I am positive. You just have to be a little more patient. Give him time and he will come around. In the meantime, be busy, do fun things for yourself. Just remember, you won’t stay that young forever. Don’t sit around and wait for a call.
Hi there. I know what your going through, but im 20 and he’s 22. I thought because both of us would be off work due to the Christmas holidays we could spend more time together. In the last 2 weeks I seen him 3 times.
I saw him more when we didn’t have the Christmas holiday.
See his m8 from London came down and was suppose to go home last week after xmas but decided to wait a little longer (I don’t think his m8 likes me either) and asked him if the both of them could do something on his last night as he’s going home tomorrow morning. ( he asked him this morning) Now my boyfriend tells me that he told him he had plans with me and his m8 reply was “you see your girlfriend all the time you only see me once or twice a year.” My boyfriend said to me over the phone that he felt guilty then.
Don’t you think he should be more guilty with me crying on the phone saying that I haven’t seen him that much and that I was missing him and that we had arranged to go out and I had been looking forward to going out. I even bought a nice new dress and everything. Had my hair done and everything as a surprise.
See the other thing is that his m8 has a girlfriend himself…but he doesn’t get to see her that often and then thinks everyone can be like him going months without seeing each other. I did that in my last relationship I couldn’t handle it and I told my boyfriend now that I couldn’t. I just don’t get it.
I’m not any expert, so I only know what works for me alone, but since the time I posted this, things have gotten better. Mostly because I am home for the holidays and I spend alot of time with my family, especially now with my grandmother sick.
I still see my boyfriend 2, sometimes 3 times a week.
Of course I would love to see him more than that, but I’m just learning to be happy with how things are. I can’t control everything and spending the short amount of time I do get to see him is much more enjoyable if I care more about having fun, then worrying about situations I can’t change.
I guess my advice to you would be what beatricegalant gave to me, make yourself busy.
Hi from what i read you seem to love this guy alot…and that’s good but it’s better when they love you more. im in a relationship with a guy who i hardly ever see myself. he is always busy with work, cars (buying, fixing and selling)… seem to love the idea of making more and more money… having read what you wrote and your reply opened my eyes for my own relationship because my advice to you is that: when a guy really loves you he will move mountains to be with you. If you say you are seeing him 3 times a week, i don’t see that being a problem… the real problem usually arise when the “marriage talk” comes up… then and there you would know if he is serious about you. from your response to the other post, my guess is,you have already set your mind about this guy… you want to believe he really loves you 100% because i think you are finding excuses for him… just like what i used to do. you are young and i am sure, there are many other great guys out there for you. Don’t waste time behind someone who doesn’t want to spend time with you. Ive learned that the hard way. Good luck with school… and your life…
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Thanks for the insight.
We’ve had tha marriage talk several times, some jokingly and some less so. He was always very serious about it. However, we don’t bring it up anymore. He’s kind of going through a college guy phase…where the only things he wants to take seriously is school and he just wants to hang out with his buddies and play video games.
This wouldn’t be so much of a problem if I had my own life. I don’t make girl friends easily, so at the moment my only friends are my sisters who live 45 minutes away. When I wrote this post I was really lonely and just blaming everything on him.
Girl I know how you feel. But you should stop thinking so much about him, and more of yourself. Take all that energy that you spend thinking about him, wanting to love him, and love youself. Your very young. Life is too short.
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i can relate to your situation since my boyfriend loves to be with his friends most of the time. i feel like he wants to be with them more than he wants to be with me.Plus,i dont trust him wen he’s with his friends since he has issues on being a player. before,we used to hangout with his friends almost everytime we’re together n i didn’t like it since i wanted time for us alone too.. nnow, its the opposite way around, wen were together its just the 2 of us and wen he’s with his friends, i’m not there almost all the time. i feel bad since he told me that in a relationship wen one decides to go out with friends it doesnt necessarily mean that he has to ask you out all the time, at times he could ask you if u want to come along and at times he doesnt but he said it doesnt mean that im not welcome to join them..what d truth about that???? for twiggy, it really good to take things more lightly and enjoy being with your family or whatever that can make u busy so you could have other divertions instead of him having lesser time with you.
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girl move on honestly when a guy really loves u he would wanna spend time with you not his mates thats him making excuses up that he would rather spend time with his friends he might b up 2 no good. And another point i would like to make is that Guys love girls more than we like boys so therefore there always have something on the side sorry to say this but its the truth girls are to stupaid to relize this or in love , love is blind trust me i know how it goes. I mean if a guy does not call or c u as much den he is with someone else . Your young start spending time on your self go out with the girls take up a new hobbie or be geeked up and concertrate on your school either way you will keep your self busy and stop thinking about him he will come round if not girl u better replace him with some one worth it life is to short.
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I wish I didn’t know so well how this feels right now.
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Hi Twiggy,
I’m going through literally the same thing that you are right now. Im 20 and my boyfriends 19 and we’ve been together for 2 years and a few months. We use to be INSEPERABLE..we spent every day together..basically lived with each other. We would never leave each others side and if we did we would be texting or calling. Everyone called us the boring old married couple because he’d work and go to school and then we’d just sit around or doing something like we’d been married for 20 years, like going to dinner and a movie. We never really went out and partied or anything like that and so now we’ve hit this HUGE roadblock. He’s basically gone into “omg I’ve done nothing for the past 2 years but be in this extremly serious relationship I need to be with friends and life it up.”
So I just wanted to see what happened with you and your boyfriend??
Currently mine is constantly back and forth with what he wants. I get calls, texts and voicemails telling me how much he misses me, loves me and can’t wait to see me and hold me and kiss me. And then I’ll talk to him the next day and it’ll be “oh im hanging out with the guys tonight.” He’ll tell me to go out and have fun, but when he finds out I am actually out he freaks and wants to know every detail of everything.
It’s like a lot of people have said..girls are a lot more mature than guys are. And I think that guys have to go through this little “college stage” and go have their fun and be with their friends. It’s like they think they’re missing out on something if they don’t.
I just definitely know where you are coming from and it would be good to see what happened to your situation! And if you guys are okay then what did it take to get there and just some advice because I’m completely confused and don’t know at this point.
Hope it all worked out how you wanted it to.
i think you should find someone else. i know its hard. hes supposed to want to call you after a hard day of homework and stress n ask to see you. i can see how he would want to hang out with his friends but there is something wrong, he should hang out with you more than his friends. its good u know to keep busy n not focus on it, otherwise it would be worse. if ur letting him know how this truley makes u feel n he still dont change,move on, i know the truth hurts. good news is i think he still loves you otherwise he wouldn’t hang out with you at all. u need someone better, to make u happy. u should ask him whats wrong n talk to him, don’t yell tho, obviously. n still if he don’t change just start dating n get over him. plus if ur the one planning on breaking up with him its easier, if u give urself some time. theres no time for excuses n changing ur mind if thats what u want to do.
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going thru the sme thing. but im living with him, n he ignores me with movies n video games n making excuses to leave our room, what a nice man.
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