school help: Please i need desperate help! - Help.com

Please i need desperate help!

Okay tomorrow, I have this BIG assignment due. AND I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT IT!!!!! There’s NO way in hell I can finish this in less then 2 hours! And PLEASE don’t scold me. IF THIS was a NORMAL assignment (regular homework, etc.), then I would accept the consequences. But this is HUGE! We’re talking it’s enough to bring my measle B right now down to a D or D-. I CAN’T AFFORD THAT AT THIS CRUCIAL TIME!!!

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All the minor things (such as the school calling my house to notify my absence) has all been covered. I’m fully confident in my signature forging skills so I’m not worried there. I plan on forging the note and bringing it Monday.
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Basically, here’s what I need help on; What can I write on the note that is believable enough for my teacher’s to fall for? It has to be sudden and shocking, but nothing TOO serious. Flu or fever isn’t serious enough. I was thinking food poisoning but since I’ve never had food poisoning before, I don’t know if they can suddenly happen in the morning. Anyone have any experience in this?

This open post was written 1 year ago | V/U/S: 78, 20, 3 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post Pongo may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. Pongo is a verified member, has been around for 1 year, 4 months and has 209 posts and 324 replies to their name.

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kheetone offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (2 minutes after post)

I got food poisoning that made me wake up at 2am and throw up every hour on the hour until noon.

Anything’s possible when your stomach is concerned. Make up a good cover story (to bring up later, maybe) about something weird or spoiled that you ate/drank.

Old milk is always a good bet.

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Help me with: Does this sound healthy?
OZE offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (4 minutes after post)

hahahahahaha i remember that well.

i won’t recomend writting a false note HOWEVER, IF you do don’t forget parents keep it simple.they don’t have to explain themselves to a teacher.
something like a doctors appointment usualy works…
but i’ve said to much.

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Laina1312 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (4 minutes after post)

Break a toe. That can last for up to two months, and for a good week, you can’t walk on it, and then when you can, it’s extremly painful. (Obviously you just fake it.)

Or a dentist appointment.

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Sans offline Verified User (1 year, 10 months) Long Term User Shouts: 57 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (5 minutes after post)

Just tell your parents. They may have mercy on you and let you stay out of school. But if you skip and get caught there’ll be hell to pay.

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OZE offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (6 minutes after post)

he’s right you know.

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Laina1312 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (7 minutes after post)

Er… right.

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Sans offline Verified User (1 year, 10 months) Long Term User Shouts: 57 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (11 minutes after post)

With the assignment having such an impact on the final grade, the teacher will be expecting deception. It will be MUCH better if the parent is in on it. The only thing worse in this situation than getting a lousy grade is getting caught skipping school. A bad grade is a disappointment. Getting caught skipping school would bring up trust and character issues.

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Pongo offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (20 minutes after post)

Sans wrote:
With the assignment having such an impact on the final grade, the teacher will be expecting deception. It will be MUCH better if the parent is in on it. The only thing worse in this situation than getting a lousy grade is getting caught skipping school. A bad grade is a disappointment. Getting caught skipping school would bring up trust and character issues.

That’s where the note comes in and the food poisoning. At our school, an excused absence means you’re exempted from the workload for that day. It neither helps you nor hurts you when it comes to final grading.

Food poisoning is definitely something a teacher doesn’t expect. The teacher might, if I’m lucky, have some pity for me. I mean, a flu or fever might easily be faked, but the teacher can’t really do anything if I said I started puking at 2 AM and every hour after that. *Wink /Kheetone.

As for getting caught, there’s no way I can get caught. At least from a teacher anyway as I won’t even be GOING to school; I was planning on not riding the bus and just hiding at the bus stop until it went away. Then I hide somewhere until it comes back and make it look like I got off and everything was dandy.

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Pongo offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (25 minutes after post)

OZE wrote:
hahahahahaha i remember that well.

i won’t recomend writting a false note HOWEVER, IF you do don’t forget parents keep it simple.they don’t have to explain themselves to a teacher.
something like a doctors appointment usualy works…
but i’ve said to much.

Oze, if I chose to write about the food poisoning thing, would the teacher get suspicious if I wrote WHAT I ate?

Something simple would be like; “I apologize for John’s absence last Wednesday. He got food poisoning”. Or something like that.

Something complex would be like; “I apologize for John’s absence last Wednesday. He woke up at 2 a.m the night before and started puking on the bed. He seemed to have drank some rotten milk.”

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Laina1312 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (26 minutes after post)

Yes. Stick with just food poisening.

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Help me with: I’m bored.
OZE offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (27 minutes after post)

to obvious. the appointments usualy a sure-win though.

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Help me with: spork or foon?
Sans offline Verified User (1 year, 10 months) Long Term User Shouts: 57 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (37 minutes after post)

Pongo wrote:

As for getting caught, there’s no way I can get caught. At least from a teacher anyway as I won’t even be GOING to school; I was planning on not riding the bus and just hiding at the bus stop until it went away. Then I hide somewhere until it comes back and make it look like I got off and everything was dandy.

And what happens when the teacher thinks it’s just too much of a coincidence and calls your parents?

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Laina1312 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (39 minutes after post)

Sans wrote:

Pongo wrote:

As for getting caught, there’s no way I can get caught. At least from a teacher anyway as I won’t even be GOING to school; I was planning on not riding the bus and just hiding at the bus stop until it went away. Then I hide somewhere until it comes back and make it look like I got off and everything was dandy.

And what happens when the teacher thinks it’s just too much of a coincidence and calls your parents?

She covers that in the original post…

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Pongo offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (40 minutes after post)

Sans wrote:

Pongo wrote:
As for getting caught, there’s no way I can get caught. At least from a teacher anyway as I won’t even be GOING to school; I was planning on not riding the bus and just hiding at the bus stop until it went away. Then I hide somewhere until it comes back and make it look like I got off and everything was dandy.
And what happens when the teacher thinks it’s just too much of a coincidence and calls your parents?

Like I said, I’m always prepared. I’ve blocked the school phone number AND disconnected the phone line.

On my student account, I have two secondary numbers. Both of them are null and void. We switched numbers. We never got around to changing the phone numbers on my account.

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antoniocardenas offline Verified User (1 year) Long Term User Shouts: 10 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (41 minutes after post)

why don’t you ask a friend to let you copy his work and later modify it so it looks different?

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Help me with: Why live?
Sans offline Verified User (1 year, 10 months) Long Term User Shouts: 57 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (45 minutes after post)

It sounds like you have thought of everything, but you had to take a lot of different steps. If it were me, I would have just faked the illness to my parents (throwing up). Then you can hang out at your house and not worry about someone seeing you, or having to keep your school from contacting your parents. The way you’ve got it worked now, if there was a real emergency with you at school, they wouldn’t have a way to contact them.

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Pongo offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (51 minutes after post)

Sans wrote:
It sounds like you have thought of everything, but you had to take a lot of different steps. If it were me, I would have just faked the illness to my parents (throwing up). Then you can hang out at your house and not worry about someone seeing you, or having to keep your school from contacting your parents. The way you’ve got it worked now, if there was a real emergency with you at school, they wouldn’t have a way to contact them.

I appreciate the thought, but no, my parents aren’t that nice. They will send me to school THEN will pick me up if my condition worsens at school but otherwise, they will send me to school.

BTW, does this look like a scam site to anyone?

http://www.bestfakedoctornotes.com/

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Laina1312 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year ago (54 minutes after post)

Yes.

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Help me with: I’m bored.
antoniocardenas offline Verified User (1 year) Long Term User Shouts: 10 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (1 hour, 17 minutes after post)

Say you had a colon infection,
it is nasty but works.

Detailed information:
http://www.colon-cleanse-constipation…

If they ask you what they gave you to treat it say Donnapine and the other one you don’t remember but you felt awesome after some hours of taking it.
http://www.webmd.com/drugs/drug-1079-…
http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddisea…

Intestinal infections are commonly very impairing (because you need to be at the bath room every 40 minutes to 2 hours).

The medicine Donnapine is more like for Irritable Bowel Syndrome, so if you say that to a medical expert, be prepared for him to suspect… Say it was recomended by an uncle or something.

Do not give more information than you should.
Actually the shorter the better.
People that say the truth do not need to prove their point, so they don’t say more than what you need to know.
Example:
“I feel awful, I’m not going to work” is more credible than:
“Hey, since the morning I have felt bad, I haven’t been able to stand up, I’m constantly puking… I think I’m gonna miss work”

Not precisely the case but I hope I expressed the point good.

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antoniocardenas offline Verified User (1 year) Long Term User Shouts: 10 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (1 hour, 21 minutes after post)

If you can go to the drug store to ask for what intestinal antispasmodic they sell more often or which intestinal antibiotic they sell better would be great.
I remeber some but they are only made here in mexico and are mexican brands. But again, if you said it right, they shouldn’t ask you about it.
If they ask you about it also act like you forgot but answer like “I think it was an antibiotic but I don’t remember the name, Preci-something… It felt awesome”. Anyways, judging by this help request, I don’t think people would think of you as a person with a very good memory :P (just kidding).

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