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There is no set way to react. Just do what you need to do to grieve … as long as that isn’t something destructive obviously.

there isnt a way your supposed to react. you will just act as you do and you will grieve in your own way. but remember its fine to cry.

bookworm16 wrote:
There is no set way to react. Just do what you need to do to grieve … as long as that isn’t something destructive obviously.

I agree with bookworm, there is no prescribed manner that society says is the preferred method to act or react. I’m usually a very private person when it comes to close friends. I’ll go through a short period of grief alone as a means of dealing with it on a personal level, then with other friends also to help them deal with it. But, I dunno, that just me..

Did you recently lose a close friend pookie?

I’m so sorry sweetie. I know of no worse feeling than hearing that from the parent of a friend. I won’t ask if you’re ok, I know you’re hurting.

One of the things I find most comforting during a time of grief is remembering the things about the person that made you smile, can you tell me some of those things?

Why? How close were the two of you?

Pookie loves you wrote:
im not hurting though, thats why im confused… by all accounts i should be ready to jump off the nearest building but i dont feel any different than i did this morning if that makes sense..

i felt the same way when my granddad died, i didn’t feel anything, i think it hadn’t sunk in until the day before his burial, then it hit me… we all grieve differently and sometimes your brain tries to protect you from that kind of shock, just because you don’t feel anything now doesn’t mean you never will.

that’s ok.. :) Do you think you just haven’t grasped the fact that he’s really gone?

Pookie, I agree with the Doc. Maybe it would be wise to sit down with family and other friends and talk about it. At least then when it sinks in you’ll have some support around you.

Pookie loves you wrote:

Barely wrote:
that’s ok.. :) Do you think you just haven’t grasped the fact that he’s really gone?

I guess not.. It still feels like he’s here

it sounds like the shock has kicked your brain into action, our brain often does this during moments and times of incredible stress and emotional hardships. it is your minds way of dealing with such information until you are ready to handle it yourself, be around family and friends for the moment because you could come to realize how much this really means at anytime.

Everyone reacts differently it depends on your copeing skills and resiliency. Just understand that everyone is going to die and it is an exciting part of life which we need to embrace with less negativity. Imagine if you died. You would want your loved ones to remember the wonderful parts of yourself and keep them alive for you with possitive feelings and share them with the world because they are not here to do it themselves anymore. They are eltswere starting the next part of existance.

Pookie, Doc makes a valid point here. Your mind is trying to help prepare you for the shock and your first thought was why do I feel this way. You need the support of others, all you need do is ask them.

Pookie nothing is written in stone as to the way people react when a person dies. Everyone takes the news differently, with some it takes time to sink in, with others the grief is immediate. One things for sure you do have to let yourself grieve, don’t worry about the tears, just let it all come its important to let it out of your system.
As Barely said, just put out a post, there’s always someone here if you need us :-)
Big hugs ((((((((((((((((((((( Pookie)))))))))))))))))))))