Stuck help: help, i desperately need to study but im stuck… like a - Help.com

Is this a one-time crisis or a chronic problem for you? What kind of school are you in? High school, college, Med school, …? What kind of studying do you need to do are you trying to cram for a test or is it something else?

It sounds like you are anxious about the tests, and this interferes with your ability to focus. Do you focus well other times, when you don’t have a big test coming? For example, if you have a paper to write do you have similar problems, or is it just tests that seem to lead to this trouble?

I have had similar difficulties, and I used to really wonder what was wrong with me as a person. I finally got treatment for ADHD and anxiety, and this made a world of difference. Your difficulties are probably different than mine, but if you feel anxious (tense, tight in the chest, irritable), then the key might be to address your anxiety first. I find that going for a run helps me a lot, and that I am better able to focus afterward.

Do you find that you can do all right if you can just get started? If this is the case, try setting very small starting goals for yourself. For example, I will sometimes limit my goal to setting up my workspace. And then set a goal of laying out a list of items to study or accomplish. Taking it in small chunks can alleviate the anxiety associated with a large, daunting task.

Another part of making small chunks is not to judge your progress as all-or-nothing. Each small bit of studying that you do is valuable, so don’t berate yourself if you get only 75% of your target completed. If it is going slowly, try telling yourself that you are not less done than before, and give yourself credit for the parts that you do accomplish.

If you think that you might have a chronic difficulty, try talking to a counselor. If your university has student counseling of some kind, try talking to them. Test anxiety is fairly common, and some schools can grant time extensions and arrange other accommodations for students who suffer from test anxiety. They can also help screen for other types of anxiety disorders or other things that could interfere with school.

You are lacking in self-discipline. You have not yet mastered the art of doing what you MUST do, however boring or distasteful. Once you acquire this self-discipline (and self-denial is an integral part of this), then you can bore into dry material and learn it.

Otherwise . . . get ready for a really mundane, low-paying job!

P.S. Almost NO ONE enjoys boring through dry material! You just have to “suck it up”!

chev.jame is correct that we all sometimes have to do things that we don’t like, but don’t listen to the chastising tone of his/her messages. A lot of people have gone through a lot of unnecessary pain because physical conditions were considered to be failures of character. From the tone of your original post, it doesn’t sound like you are goofing off — it sounds like you are trying but struggling. Sometimes people who haven’t been there don’t get it. chev.jame seems to want you to feel bad about yourself so that you will seek virtue and try harder. Putting forth your best effort is always a good idea, but sometimes and for some people trying harder, by itself, is not enough. At these times the disciplinarian approach is like berating a paralyzed person for not walking — hurtful and unproductive.

By the way, not every person with anxiety or ADHD requires pharmacological treatment — most of the benefit really comes from being able to tap into the body of knowledge about how to work effectively when you have different strengths and weaknesses than other people. For example, with fMRI imaging it is possible to see how, in the brains of people with ADHD, the brain reduces blood flow to certain areas when under strain. Trying harder to study can sometimes be counterproductive and just further inhibit the brain’s ability to focus, just like trying harder to lift a weight when a muscle is exhausted.

A better idea (than just trying to will yourself into focus) is to take a break to get some exercise, and then get a person to sit with you briefly (15-20 minutes) while you get started. This allows you to bypass one part of your brain that may not be functioning as well at this point in time and tap into another to help you get moving. The end result is the same, but different people need to use different methods to get there.

Ah, TJ, Chev James chastises himself quite often!

We need to be a little tougher on ourselves than a teacher or boss should be. We need to develop that little “inner voice” that tells us to get going, to focus, to buckle down . . . to kick us in the rear when we need it.

There may be medical/psychological issues in play . . . but I would also posit that our current generation is used to being “entertained,” i.e., they have lived “multimedia lives,” and absorbing dry material from a textbook is something they are not really conditioned to do.

I would surmise that most of the people who have problems “buckling down” are NOT affected by ADHD, but simply find the material uninspiring and lacking in stimulation. Fine. But it still has to be learned. This takes self-discipline, and self-denial is part and parcel of that. We’d rather watch an interesting TV program or play an electrifying game than read Clower & Due’s latest tome on macroeconomics . . . but the material still has to be learned.

One thing that has to be internalized is that we CANNOT multi-task. We really can’t. The latest studies are conclusive. So, we can forget doing our homework while watching television or talking on the phone, or listening to loud music. We have to isolate ourselves from such distractions in order to really focus on the task at hand.

And, sometimes, we have to chastise ourselves and say, “We CAN do this!”

chev, I agree with you on all of your statements, except for your dismissal (though not denial) of other causes.

Even if it is true that many people fail to achieve solely through lack of effort and self-discipline, we should not ignore the remainder, who have been badly served by institutions such as schools for a long time. I see this as similar to the way that my father was forced to write with his right hand in school because it was thought that being left-handed was incorrect in some way. He actually learned to turn the paper upside down and write backwards with his left to make the slant come out right, because it was easier than writing with his right hand. Should we make other people go through similar absurdities just because they are uncommon, like left-handers? If someone is clearly interested in doing well but struggling to succeed, we should be trying to help them succeed.

I don’t know enough to make any diagnosis of fsafee, but I am offering some information that I think should be of use to some people in his situation. If his problem is illusory then you are right, he can solve it himself. However, if his sturggle is real and he cannot muscle his way through the block, then this may be of value to him.

Fsafee, I would deduce that you have fewer distractions at the fast-food restaurant. Am I correct? After all, you don’t have the things there that you have at your apartment . . . no 124 TV channels, games, radio, etc.

And a study partner can help keep you “on track.”

Yes, TJ, schools often failed us, as you so aptly pointed out in your example.

But I also think that good study habits are becoming a lost art. Schools do not give anything like the homework they once did. A study came out in the 1970s that said kids’ social development was being harmed by too much homework. Then the homework levels dropped drastically. Kids coast through high school and then go to college, where they are suddenly inundated by homework. Quite a shock to the system.

Glad you’re getting it done, Fsafee!