Love help: What’s up with my ex? - Help.com



This post left anonymously

What’s up with my ex?

He broke up with me on Saturday. Well, he’s broken up with me a lot of times before. And he always told me afterwards that he loved me so much and just couldn’t see himself without me. Well, last Saturday he said that he cared deeply about me but he thinks he didn’t love me because now he could picture himself without me. He had some issues with my past, and I’m very, very insecure, and both things got the bes of us.

Well, we’ve been talking over IM since Sunday. And he’s been very nice, sometimes even nicer than when we were dating, albeit he hasn’t mentioned anything about the break up and neither have I. I’ll see him on Thursday because we’re in a band together, and we have to rehearse because we have a big show coming in a major city (we live in a smallish town) in like two more weeks. Well, I’ve been doing a lot of the planning and he’s been thanking me profusely. Also, he’s been really supportive about my uncle’s illness. And talking about stuff we did last week mentioning what a great time he had. I just called him to ask him if he had told his family about what happened and he said that no, and that he was busy so we’d talk later.

However this is very confusing as I don’t know if he just wants to be friends. he never mentioned that when we broke up. I’m so confused as I love him, and I’d be very hurt if he just plans on being friends and maybe he’s already got his eye on someone else. I’m very confused as I can’t just be his friend if I love him, but then again, I don’t know if he’s trying to win me back.

What could be going on? I’m afraid of flat out asking him about it, because he might get angry or whatever and I don’t want to have a nasty fight. On Saturday he said he didn’t love me, or that he wasn’t sure he did, but sometimes he says things out of spite. I mean, he was telling me last week that he loved me almost every day! Even talking about marriage… I don’t get him. He’s broken up with me before and sometimes I’ve thought it’s been definitive but he’ll come up with the biggest twists and then ask me to get back together. But I’m not sure if this time it’s gonna be the same… it’s different when we speak over IM than seeing each other face to face. I can’t wait until thursday, the anxiety is killing me, I need to know what’s on his mind to decide on NC or if we get back together.

This open post was written 12 months ago | V/U/S: 160, 2, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


Reciprocity (0) Reciprocation Failure -- The poster has NOT helped anyone else yet!

Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

Post Tags (10)

Replies (2)

Where were you?

Click and drag to move the map around. FAQ: How we place people on this map »
You can also watch events on Help.com as they happen
Mouse over the map for 2 seconds to see an expanded, interactive view

HelpBot offline Verified User (0 minutes) Shouts: 5 #
San Francisco, CA, US | 12 months ago (0 minutes after post)

Are you looking for information on uploading an avatar or why you aren’t recieving notices on tags you’re subscribed too?

Unfortunately both of these features have been disabled until further notice. Looks like you’ll have to stick with your “letter of the alphabet” avatar. You can also Contact us with any other issues you have.

Note: I’m a robot that the Help.com staff created. If this response is in error, I apologize, please ignore it.

ldee47 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 12 months ago (7 hours, 18 minutes after post)

wow– thts a toughie

im sorry i dnt know what to do
maybe you should confront him, hard as it may seem

or maybe if you actt like ur emotionally distanced from him, he might hav a change of heart..

he sounds a little damaged, you kno? no offense
my ex is the same way– i just had to leave, hard as it was.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: i think i like a guy

Invite Others to Help

A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.