Mind help: i am much older now but when i was young i was fascinated with - Help.com

that’s interesting. tell me more, please.

i can’t, not right now any way. tired cant think straight

okays. Whenever you’re ready. I practically live on here.

the memories are so scattered, i do believe i have done long term damage to my mind. i do how ever recall the more sever experiences. one night i went to work seemed ordinary enough of a night. as i begin my tasks people round me were on a different trip than usual it seemed as though they were expecting something . one girl said to me she had a dream were she was attacked by witches and a spike was driven through her tongue and that when she woke her tongue was split in half. well she then showed me her tongue it was. now mind the slit was in the center of the tongue and stretched for about an inch but for some reason that did not surprise or warrant any concern from me. next a lady walked in the store behind her a man walked in with dark holes for eyes i was under the impression no one else can see him but me. he made some gesture with his like magician would and a small blue ball appeared in his hand he then bounced the ball of the floor in my direction as the ball approached me and as i thought to expect a hit from this ball the ball dissipates seemed to go right in to me. at that moment my boss comes out of the store and fires me for being on drugs i wasn’t. on the way out i give a hug to one of my coworkers she liked me but i always thought she was to young for me, a strange thing happened it hurts this hug. as i pull away fells like i was being torn apart i cant find a description for the feeling. that night i walked home from work almost getting hit by a couple of cars. i get home and fall in to a state of euphoria that evening i would not sleep or eat this lasted two weeks. i could not sleep or eat my mind slowly becoming more sensitive. in this time winter was approaching felt nice. in these two weeks i would be driven to do things i would later believe were not of me. but in looking back it was the first time were i saw the people in the environment behave in a informative way. like they new some thing. i would experience this a couple more times once on an evening much after the above. and another in new york.

That is strange…

the only weird feelings i’ve had were one day a friend came into the library where i was working…we were talkinga bout religion, spirits , demons and such.

i haven’t been religious in quite some time.

and started to feel strong paranoia and was very afraid to go back to my room where i live.

i went home and had an out of body experience where i kept on seeing myself from behind. it ws very windy that day and the wind kept on blowing around me. i was talking to my mother on the phone because i was afraid that something would happen to me and nobody would be witness.

so i kept on seeing a vision of myself from behind. and was so afraid i’d come face to face with myself, that i would turn and i would see my face.

basically this other conscious coming face-to-face with my physical body. whoa, that would be mind blowing for me, i think. but then i think i was on the verge of opening up, understanding vasts spaces of reality.

i dunno…..

but i have days of intense euphoria and then major downs. is that bipolarism?

i try to stay quiet and away from ppl, so i can’t be labeled, “strange”.

so many different diagnosis for everything.

but, i just want the ocean. can’t wait to move next year.

o yes, spheres of energy? i’ve seen them today. i usually try to keep strange things from me, and pointedly ignore them.

departing i’m tired don’t want to dig something up i’ve shared to much as it is