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What happened?

I’m happy to talk with ya. Whats going on?

Everythings falling apart in my life. I hate myself. My family is driving me crazy! Everyone is always drunk! Always!

so are your family alcoholics?

what do um mean u hatew urself? what do u hate?

I’ve had some experience with this with someone who is very close to me…The thing is when it comes to your family it is so very hard to walk away. But if they are hurting you, then you must find the strength to distance yourself from that. Otherwise they will bring you down with them and their destructive behavior will merely rub off on every aspect of your life. It sounds like you need to think about yourself. Take control of your life and don’t let your family dictate it for you. If they are hurting you then they do not really care enough about you to help–and you need to distance yourself. Don’t let them bring you down. You deserve better than that.

angel♥ wrote:
so are your family alcoholics?

basically they are even my little brother came home all drunk! He’s only 14!

YouWIsH wrote:
what do um mean u hatew urself? what do u hate?

I dunno. Everything I hate that I have all this anxiety and depression goin on. It makes things a gazillion time harder to do antyhing, ay know?

awwwh sorry. i know a lot of alcoholics as well and its pretty hard… i cant imagine your whole family being like that though. =/

ahhhh i ahve anxiety and depression to. i know how you feel. it sucks!

yea..it does just dont let it push u to do something drastic or crazy!..do u ever try to talk to ur family?

angel♥ wrote:
awwwh sorry. i know a lot of alcoholics as well and its pretty hard… i cant imagine your whole family being like that though. =/ahhhh i ahve anxiety and depression to. i know how you feel. it sucks!

Your right angle it does suck big time!

YouWIsH wrote:
yea..it does just dont let it push u to do something drastic or crazy!..do u ever try to talk to ur family?

Sometimes it gets so bad that I feel like I need to cut myself. I’ve done it quite a few times today. i can’t help myself..I couldn’t talk to them.. Have you ever tried reasoning with a drunk? Not that much fun.

i know ive been there…with the cutting i mean but it juust isnt worth it..and what sux is it fixes ur problems temporarily but ur left with ugly scars..that i am STILL tryingto get rid of..

Anxiety and depression do suck. Big time. But it can be managed in more constructive ways. I’m sorry to hear that you get the urge to cut yourself. It is tough to fight with something like that on top of it all..but even though it might feel like cutting helps it is only adding to the problem. Try to find something that interests you and when things get bad, retreat to that activity. Get out of your house as much as is humanly possible…

Yeah, things are bad…but what can you do about it? I think that is the angle you need to approach this from. What can you do to make your life better?

I really can’t DO anything about it. There isn’t anything I CAN do. NO one listens to me about anything the only thing I can do is cut myself. At least then I have control over my own pain

aahhh i cut as well. do you want to stop? or are you at the point where you wanan keep goig cause its the only tihng that keeps you sane kinda thing?

You mustn’t think like that. If you believe there is nothing you can do…well expect to be right. Like that saying about pessimists: they are either always right or pleasantly surprised. If you don’t believe you can help yourself you won’t be able to. But if you do believe that you can change your lot in life your chances increase a thousand fold.

So no one listens to you? Of course not. You can’t change people who don’t want to change…who don’t see themselves committing any wrong. They are the victims of their own lives. You might not be able to help them but you can certainly work on helping yourself. There is no better control than taking control of your own life.

angel♥ wrote:
aahhh i cut as well. do you want to stop? or are you at the point where you wanan keep goig cause its the only tihng that keeps you sane kinda thing?

Kinda both…I guess. I want to stop because I don’t like how if someone asks about it I have to lie and be like “oohhh my cat” but I don’t want to because then I dunno I sort of like the feelings it relieves. The feelings I have when I do it, ya know? I wish I would have never started in the first place but unfortunatly I did. I don’t wish this on anyone else tho! Never! I’m sorry you know about it angel :/ What about you?

Anonymous wrote:

angel♥ wrote:
aahhh i cut as well. do you want to stop? or are you at the point where you wanan keep goig cause its the only tihng that keeps you sane kinda thing?

Kinda both…I guess. I want to stop because I don’t like how if someone asks about it I have to lie and be like “oohhh my cat” but I don’t want to because then I dunno I sort of like the feelings it relieves. The feelings I have when I do it, ya know? I wish I would have never started in the first place but unfortunatly I did. I don’t wish this on anyone else tho! Never! I’m sorry you know about it angel :/ What about you?

wow. you sound exactly like me. im like… i want to stop because i hate the marks it leaves… my mom noticed the other day and i told her it was my cat.. but it doesnt really look like a catch scratch and she didnt seem to believe me.. idk though.
so i wanna stop because of that.. but then i dont because when im upset, cutting calms me down. gets me to focus on something else for a while. i just wish there was another way i could find instead of self harm that could help.

so i guess im the same. i want to stop but then i dont.

have you heard of the organization “To Write Love On Her Arms”?

its helped me a lot… and i try and tell people about it every chance i can :P

OMG! People look at me like that too! Sometimes I think it might be my own stupid paranoid feelings tho…I kinda hope? haha Yeah I feel the same way. Guess its like a love hate relationship :) or would that be :( I dunno

angel♥ wrote:
have you heard of the organization “To Write Love On Her Arms”? its helped me a lot… and i try and tell people about it every chance i can :P

Yeah! actually thats so weird that you said that becasue I was just goint to ask you the same thing!?!?!…weird haha

i tell everybody it was a cat too..and they look at me like …riiiight

LOL! haha thats ironic. :P its so amazing. Renee Yohe is my idol =) lol

YouWIsH wrote:
i tell everybody it was a cat too..and they look at me like …riiiight

ahhh i hate that. i just started cutting pretty recently…. a few weeks ago. the only person who has noticed is my mom.. so far. someones bound to notice sooner or later though =/

yea i waer long sleevesalot

yeah i have been too lately. there was one day that i forgot though.. i just woke up and was in a daze, got dressed( in a t-shirt) and went out. my mom was like ?!??!?!

my mother thinks im some suicidal maniac..shes all like u need help…*eyes roll*

awwh really? that sucks.. im sorry.

my parents are pretty understanding. my whole family has depression, although im the farthest into it.. they can control it. but i still cant talk to any of them about it.

Why do you feel you cannot talk about it with them Angel?

but anon- getting back to the original post… i think we’re all broken in some way. some more than others maybe but still. you can get out of this depression if you work towards it. itll take a while but its worth it. i got out of it for a while and it was amazing. ive never felt better. so keep working k?

btw how old are oyu?

burger- i really dont know to be honest lol. but im not gonna make this post about me. lets get back to the original poster :P

angel♥ wrote:
but anon- getting back to the original post… i think we’re all broken in some way. some more than others maybe but still. you can get out of this depression if you work towards it. itll take a while but its worth it. i got out of it for a while and it was amazing. ive never felt better. so keep working k?

I agree completely

I don’t know if I’ll ever get over it. It’s been like this for like forever it seems. IT’s been the worst these past few months. I can’t stop thinking about kiling myself and I don’t want to but I just can’t get it out of my head, ya know?

yeah i know how you feel. thats what i was like for the longest time. ive been going through really bad depression for 4 years now. but you get to a point and its like “wtf am i doing?!” and you just all the sudden have more power to help yourself.
ill be honest and say it might not ever stop fully. but you will learn to cope with it and it will die down a lot.

how old are you?

angel♥ wrote:
yeah i know how you feel. thats what i was like for the longest time. ive been going through really bad depression for 4 years now. but you get to a point and its like “wtf am i doing?!” and you just all the sudden have more power to help yourself. ill be honest and say it might not ever stop fully. but you will learn to cope with it and it will die down a lot. how old are you?

I’m 23 which makes me feel like a super freak doin all these things feeling all these feelings :/ I dunno I guess I”m just a mess who knows…sorry to bother all you guys with this crap:(

I’ve been trying to cope with things but I just can’t some reason I feel stuck, and completley broken, ya know?

its not a bother at all! thats y we are here!

I struggled with depression (well still am just not as bad) for over a year and a half without seeking help. I thought I would be able to just cure myself. So I applied “band-aid” fixes. Anything that would take my mind off the real problems in my life. It wasn’t until I really decided to go out and seek help. Find support. Work with doctors to find the right medication (which is a real pain, but completely worth it), and talk to a counselor about things. It was like the difference between day and night for me.

Right now you might feel pinioned–unable to do anything, stuck, a prisoner of our own life, despair, and pain–but it will not last. You will find the strength. And if you look hard enough you will find the help you need. But just like with everything. It takes time and perseverance…and a good support system–and that’s why we’re here :)

Oh..and you are so not a freak

Thanks guys :) I just don’t know what to do. I’m seein a therapsit taking medication and all which I probably shouldn’t mention isn’t helping. I actually took triple the amount I was suppose to today…i don’t know why I did that ahhhhhhh

If you medication isn’t helping you need to talk to your doctor immediatly.

I know its makeing things worse now. I just can’t get an appointment. I thought maybe if I just upped it would work

No please don’t up it…you can hurt yourself. You should call your doctor and tell them what is happening–that the medicine isn’t helping and is making it worse. And if that doesn’t get you an appointment immediately, tell them you are having feelings of suicide (you need to tell your doctor this in any case)…if you still can’t get an appointment, well you really need a new doctor then.

Angel-First, get all thoughts of suicide off your mind.As long as you are alive, things can improve,however,if you are dead, then things can never improve.Stop dwelling on the negative & thinking how bad things are, & focus on what you do have.You have two arms & two legs(some people don”t), you are not blind or deaf,ect.

another suggestion for you Angel - if you have family who are alcoholics the organisation al anon family groups could be a great help to you. look them up and find a meeting in your local area to visit. sending you encouragement.

rittergai wrote:
Angel-First, get all thoughts of suicide off your mind.As long as you are alive, things can improve,however,if you are dead, then things can never improve.Stop dwelling on the negative & thinking how bad things are, & focus on what you do have.You have two arms & two legs(some people don”t), you are not blind or deaf,ect.

yalo wrote:
another suggestion for you Angel - if you have family who are alcoholics the organisation al anon family groups could be a great help to you. look them up and find a meeting in your local area to visit. sending you encouragement.

im not the original poster hehe. i was just helping out

sorry angel, got confused there!

lol its cool =)