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Usually its stress or something crazy thats happening. Gives me the relief I guess I soo much need. I like the way it feels. The energy that comes along with it. The way everything is so much better. ahhh i sound nutz

bkny wrote:
Cutting yourself is not crazy, but it is definitely not healthy. You sound like you’re to the point of doing it routinely, which is something that you most definitely need to stop doing completely. One reason you may be doing it is because of the need to feel “alive”. Do you find yourself ever feeling that way? If I may ask, what is your perception of religion and/or life at this point in time?

I do do that to feel alive sometimes. It just gets so numbing tho its hard to find the dividing point, ya know? I guess I believe in god I don’t go to church or anythign tho…Life isn’t really one of my strong suits tho. Kinda suck at it really.

ioeojifewio wrote:
this is sad, you have half a million people who don’t understand what is going on

ok here is the facts, you are dependent, or abusing the chemical reaction cause by the act, namely the endorphins (which are stronger than most opiates)

if you want the same effect without the cutting it is easy.

it is called a rubber band, wear one around your wrist, when you fell like you want to cut your self pull it up and snap it on the clump of arteries and veins at the base of your wrist, there is a huge nerve cluster there, you do that and the body will dump pain killers.

it works

I’ve treid the rubber band thing its not the same for me. I need to see the blood. I can’t explain it with out sounding like a complete crazy person but seeing the blood helps sooo much more. I’ve tried the pen thing too but its not the same…

HAHAH LOL Yeah where you draw on yourself with a red pen and I guess its suppose to mock bleeding….didn’t work so much for me really.

I’m trying bkny and I do workout! That does help a lot too but I still keep cutting thats why I feel completley un helpable! frustration!

Isn’t that still cutting tho?

bkny wrote:
When was the first time you cut yourself and why? If you don’t mind

Its been like a year a little less maybe? since I can first remember the first time I’ve actually done it but the past few months have been the worst ever! Just can’t seem to get enough of it..its scarry…

ioeojifewio wrote:
it is piercing, you get droplets of blood coming out

That still sounds like cutting still. I know the blood part but I want to stop all together.

ioeojifewio wrote:
well how do you see blood without getting blood out.

cook alot of barbaque?

there really is no answer

I dunnoo. I’m sorry. I just want to stop wanting to see my own blood. If I see it then I’m hooked again. I feel the pain and then the two go hand and hand. Thats what I’m tryin to say. sorry.

I know bkny your right it is up to me. I just wish it wasn’t. I’m not the type of person who is good fixing herself. Sounds weird maybe but i’m sorry.

I’m afraid to talk to anyone about it outside of here. Thats why I’ve posted as anon becasue I feel like such a freak talking about my like for seeing my own blood! Its freaky and wierd and I wish it wasn’t happening. I would change it if I could. I’m trying but its still lerking in the back of my mind.

Hahah yeah I do it alone. Very slick bkny :D LOL I could try that

Oh so your going to play it like that now huh? HAHAH

Yeah I don’t know whats a stumpys girl website?! Confused!

thats is f’ed up! Kinda weird you know about that….

Never mind guys.