I say give the new girl a chance and see what happens.
avoid at much contact as possible with your ex-girlfriend…don’t give her the impression that you will be forever the safety net or she’ll never be outta your life….i have to leave the best relationship i’ve ever had right now and we are on excellent terms we just want different things and mine was only 2 years long….we don’t hate each other and feel like we are each losing our best friends…….but not much contact will help each other move on with our lives
Braad wrote:
I say give the new girl a chance and see what happens.
i want to but, im pulled away. Like, litteraly speaking. It feels like im being pulled to another person, and being pulled away. Almost like i dont want to date at all.. but i do… its kinda hard to figure out..
ya it will be…..you’ll feel like if you give the new girl a chance you’re sort of cheating on your ex-girlfriend and won’t be able to be there for her but at same time you want to give this new girl a chance to take your mind of the old girl…sometimes the easiest thing to do is not date until your mind is 100% sure of what you want……i hope this helps
j_a_burc wrote:
avoid at much contact as possible with your ex-girlfriend…don’t give her the impression that you will be forever the safety net or she’ll never be outta your life….i have to leave the best relationship i’ve ever had right now and we are on excellent terms we just want different things and mine was only 2 years long….we don’t hate each other and feel like we are each losing our best friends…….but not much contact will help each other move on with our lives
we do, i mean, we are still friends but, i got a new phone and dont have her number anymore and she hasnt sent me anything so…eh. We had a great relationship and still want to be friends, is that a good idea?
depends….can you see yourself talking to her or seeing her in person without having old feelings for her???
j_a_burc wrote:
ya it will be…..you’ll feel like if you give the new girl a chance you’re sort of cheating on your ex-girlfriend and won’t be able to be there for her but at same time you want to give this new girl a chance to take your mind of the old girl…sometimes the easiest thing to do is not date until your mind is 100% sure of what you want……i hope this helps
wow… yes that… i think thats it? Im still attached to the ex, but dont want her… i mean, together for 5 years is a long time.. i dont want to date couse of that i think… but, i want to date couse i miss the relationship with girls… they’re so nice. So… how do i reach that 100% ?
j_a_burc wrote:
depends….can you see yourself talking to her or seeing her in person without having old feelings for her???
Well, we met once after we had gone our seperate ways, and we just talked about stuff. I wouldnt have minded snugglin up to her couse we are so confortable with eachother, but… i dont want to be with her anymore couse of the stuff she is doing now… so. maybe a little old feelings but, im a pansy and wont act on anything.
that’s where that time with no relationships comes in…everyone wants to feel loved and know there is someone out there for them…but to truly get to that point sometimes it takes a little while to get there…i have a huge dis-trust for most girls on the planet and i chose to just have fun for about 6 months before i met my currently transistioning ex-girlfriend and i thought she was for me but god has decided not and has other plans
j_a_burc wrote:
that’s where that time with no relationships comes in…everyone wants to feel loved and know there is someone out there for them…but to truly get to that point sometimes it takes a little while to get there…i have a huge dis-trust for most girls on the planet and i chose to just have fun for about 6 months before i met my currently transistioning ex-girlfriend and i thought she was for me but god has decided not and has other plans
thats what i’ve always told myself. If it doesnt work out, it doesnt work out. So i guess thats why i havnt been so… distraught over all this. But yah…thanks for the help! It really did help a bunch. =D
good luck and i hope things work out well for both of us…maybe we can post again saying how happy each other is haha
j_a_burc wrote:
good luck and i hope things work out well for both of us…maybe we can post again saying how happy each other is haha
lol, i look forward to it
Richard cor de lyon wrote:
You’ve got a good head on your shoulders. It sounds to me like you are moving in the right direction. Rebounding is dangerous, but it doesn’t quite sound like that’s where you are coming from. Here are a few posts that I’ve written about the subject if you are interested.http://help.com/post/211805-get-over-ithttp://help.com/post/22825 9-love-and-relationshipshttp://help.com/post/201052-love-never-goes-away-co mpletelyhttp://help.com/post/118680-the-five-as-everybody-wanBottom line is… the world around us moves pretty fast, and when opportunity knocks… not to answer the door at that time might mean loosing the opportunity.Bright blessings ~ Richard
thanks for those links, i read a couple of them, and i have no hard feelings for my ex, i feel bad couse the choices she is making is going to ruin her life. And i dont want to see her fall as hard as we know she might. I learned a ton from her and no regrets.
Moving on though… is… hard i think right now. The girl i like is currently trying to woo a different guy. =( we used to dance on an old ballroom team and… i think she just likes me as a friend. At least, she has never seemed interested in me more than just being friends. Should i just back off and let my head clear for a while or… should i get out there and start looking?
Don’t bounce back into a relationship. Too many people underestimate the whole moving on thing and just get into another relationship and expect that for all the things they miss about the last relationship will be transitioned to the new partner. Its unfair to them! Become a whole person, don’t screw up a relationship by requiring of your partner, you should be whole enough in yourself to be able t completely give to them. I think you should fly single for a while, it seems like your looking for a relationship for the relationship, not the partner.
J.
Braad
j_a_burc
Bright blessings ~
Jerry