Feel help: OK, my problem is I cry WAY too easily. - Help.com

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Sorry, I just got your request now. Perhaps isn’t the right time to ask me advice (it’s 3am of New Year’s Day here, I’m a little drunk. Lol) But I’ll try my best.

First off, what exactly do you cry over?

Well, I myself get panic attacks, and I can understand the emotion and stress they cause. That is nothing to be ashamed about. But how do you mean that your feelings get hurt too easily? Do you mean that you take critisism top harshly?

Yes, it certainly does make sense. I’m the same way. I’m extremely sensitive when people speak to me the wrong way, or I sense a tone in their voice that sets me off. My issues though, have to do with my past, may I ask, if it’s not too personaly, has anything happened in your past that may trigger it? Were you bullied at school? Did your parents cause some issues etc?

You don’t have to answer if you don’t feel comfortable doing so.

be happy you can cry trust me the worst feeling in the world is when you cant. crying is healthy so dont take it for granted when people subsitute things instead of crying or force themselves not to cry then there is no relief from the pain or whatever they are feeling. i can see where your getting at though but its no big deal i mean its who you are and some people cry more easier then others. take it as something you should be thankful for i for one have trouble crying because i subsituted cutting for it so its messed up my ability to cry for a while now. when i want to i just cant. so be happy that you can cry.

You get your self worth from what you think others think of you. If you don’t feel they accept you and like you, then you feel horrible. You have developed a lot of negative self-talk where you interpret things badly by reflex.

First, realize that others feel shy and insecure as well. Everyone has insecurity whether or not they admit it. When they see you unhappy, they naturally think you have some issue with them. They may react in a defensive way. You take that to mean they have a problem with you. It can be a self-fulfilling prophesy.

You need to develop a sense of self-worth that you can rely on regardless of what others may be thinking or feeling. That comes from setting little goals for yourself and meeting them. Exercise, socializing, working, hobbies, all of these things are important.

Never give in to fear. Each time you run away from a problem, you teach your brain that running away feels good. Each time you burst into tears and get sympathy from someone, you teach your brain to cry so you will be comforted or get off easier. You have to re-train your brain by using new behaviours to get better results. Your brain will learn to take action, ask questions, laugh, etc. instead of cry or run away.

You can do it!

careful with trying to fix yourself from crying too much, i used to cry too much, from everything, everything i was told, just hearing something sad, my dad helped me bro out when playing this card game once and they won against me, that made me cry. so i stopped, i stopped completely an now i haven’t cried for 6 years and it hurts, its like i don’t know how to, its like now everything’s going to be kept inside me and i cant get them out, bottled up.

i think although i may be wrong as i normally am, that you cry because you care, and caring is not a bad thing, but, if you care too much then you start doing things that well aren’t healthy. I’m not saying to stop caring, and become as cold as a stone, as i know are few people are to get over what they go through.

sometimes, well a lot of times you should never take things too personally, what people say and think are two different things. You sound like a nice caring sweet person, so remember smile, live life, try things!!! your life is yours, so remember to be happy, and be happy because you want to be!!!

soz soz if dis doesn’t actually help, im sleep deprived as usual lol

Sorry ,cant read all the replies, I may have given you this B4 but http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_… {{HUGS}}

Crying isn’t bad, but it isn’t fun either. My wife cries very easily, and has a hard time stopping. Because I have some background in biomedical neuroscience I have done some specific reading of papers on crying. Here’s what I have learned.

Crying is a response to stress. It can be flavored with any number of different emotions (fear, sadness, happiness, etc) but the essential trigger is stress. If you feel near to crying and something stressful happens you can be sure you will tip over into crying. My wife is afraid of crying and she used to become angry at herself when she cried. This naturally made her cry harder, because anger is stressful. As strong a person as she was, her natural instinct to tense up and force herself to stop crying was only making it worse, because it just strengthened the stress responses that were making her cry. Crying is like sliding in a car on a slick surface — trying to turn out of it right away just makes it worse, but if you turn with the slide you can regain control and stop the car.

Knowing this has helped my wife. She still cries easily (especially when she feels that someone is disapproving of her), but she recovers more easily because she has learned not to berate herself. I used to try to get her to stop crying by addressing the reason she started crying, but now I know that just holding her and giving her time to process her emotion works better. Once she feels calmer and safer, then we can talk about whatever is upsetting her.

The worst is when we beat ourselves up for not being good enough in some unrealistic way. My wife does that a lot. Anger can be hard to let go of, and self-anger is even harder. However, forgiveness and acceptance do the trick.

There are also some things you can do right away to feel better, if you don’t already. Avoid caffeine and energy drinks. Stimulants trigger the body’s stress response by increasing the neurotransmitter norepinephrine, the effect of which which is like getting a small shot of adrenaline. If you cry a lot, you don’t need any more norepinephrine floating around in you.

I say it a lot in different posts, but exercise is as close as you will ever find to a magic cure for intense worry and anxiety. You don’t have to be good at it, just find something that you can do to raise your heartrate for 45 minutes or so, and it will alleviate much of the stress that makes you cry and feel anxious. Running is simplest, but if there is something you enjoy more like dancing, yoga, or skiing, then that is even better.

I know this is a really long post, but I hear a lot of my wife’s experiences in what you said, and I hope that our experiences will benefit you.

tj, i marked yours as quoteable,great read, great advice :)

I totally understand you.. everyday nothing bad really happened I just can cry any time i “want” to….Help me plz, I want to be happy and stop this nonsense.

dragonhope198 wrote:
I totally understand you.. everyday nothing bad really happened I just can cry any time i “want” to….Help me plz, I want to be happy and stop this nonsense.

All you need is two things: focus on other people; commit to and chase goals. Whenever you are anxious, focus on other people’s problems and chase your own goals. Your fears are just sensations. Go ahead and feel them. Go ahead and cry. When you fight them, you make it worse. Let it out and don’t let them distract you.

As an individual who has cried easily over every little thing for much of my life I came to realize that I looked at life through the eyes of a victim. Someone at a personal growth seminar I went to asked me if being sad ‘worked” for me and when I thought about it, I realized that it really doesn’t.This doesn’t mean that I don’t cry anymore, I do, but not as much as in the past. I also realize that being happy is a choice just as being sad or depressed is a choice. I used to think that I was clinically depressed but I now realize that as I can control my emotions rather than having my emotions control me. I am still a very sensitive person, I am very empathetic, when people are in bad situations I can really image what it’s like to be in their situation. I was able to really look at this and decide to draw boundaries about how deeply i care about what goes on with others, ie; not get so deep into other people’s problems. I realize that i can’t internalize what happens to other people, it’s just not healthy. i also realize that what other people do, think or say is much more about them then it is about me. I was able to stop personalizing when people were unkind to me. I also learned to stand up for myself without getting upset.

A man pushed me the other day when I didn’t get out of his way quickly enough. We were in a take-out restaurant and he was eating in with his wife. He just pushed me out of the way and I was speechless. So I walked over to his table and quietly said to him that he has no right to put his hands on any woman especially a stranger and asked him to apologise. He got loud and rude and denied pushing me. I did not yell but I raised my voice a little and I said “you certainly did push me and you are rude!” and left the restaurant. As I walked out I noticed that everyone was looking at him with very negative expressions, not at me, at him, and a short time ago I would have been upset and that situation would have played in my head over and over. Standing my ground and finding my power has helped me toughen up. I can get assertive when someone is treating me badly and not be a wimp.

I have a similar issue. I still don’t know why this happens, but I prefer to think that I’m too emotive. My case is related only to the fact that I cry very easily. I have no problens with anxiety or something of the kind. Indeed, even the fact that I cry easily isn’t a big problem in my life anymore, maybe cause it happens since I was a child.

I don’t remember where I read on internet, but somebody wrote once that “who cries easily, since not by depressive issues, have to thank for to be able to establish active links with their feelings.” That is a cute way to think about it, do not?

When I was a child, my mom tells that I cried watching “Dead Poets Society”, even I was with 3 years old and I still couldn’t read the subtitles, the film was in original audio in English with portuguese subtitles (I’m Brazilian). I really don’t remember that, but, now, it’s really funny to hear this history. But the really funny is that, today, when I hear my mom telling to someone this event, I feel my eyes about to be wet, not by shyness, but nostalgia I guess (have too many things I wanted to remember and I can’t…). That is just a simple example. Another is whenever a brother or other relative tells a event that touched me, even I don’t remembering anything, I feel the tears coming out too.

The worst is when I watch movies or I read books of drama. Even if it’s a “made for TV” or a short story type B or Z (lol), when I don’t put out the tears out, I feel it wanting to. I passed through too many embarrasing situations on cinemas, movie sections on school and, now, on college and watching movies with my girlfriend. Occasionally, even she (my girlfriend) knowing me so well as myself, she likes to make a joke from me. But she is a little emotive too, and sometimes we cry together (lol).

After all, I believe that, if I don’t learned to handle it, at least I learned how to ignore it. Now I try to avoid embarrassing situations in public, for personal reasons (cuz “men don’t cry”, ya know, yeah!? Humph!).

But what I think is more important to stress is that I’m not a sad person. Or rather, I’m not a person more sad than a normal person. I smile a lot during all the day and I always try to maintain my good humor. I have patience with annoying things and people (TO MUCH, indeed, modesty aside). Today, the fact cry easily affect my life so much as being caught using a stuck underpants or a sock: NOTHING!

I hope that, to you, Nat, this fact is only a result by keep up and strong your links with your own feelings! And that you, if still don’t, can laugh about it a day.

Thanks for sharing it. I also was needing.
A hug for all.

its so hard to explain but all these comments are so good and helpful for you to solve this problem.
http://www.findkcb.com/facts-about-sk…

borderline personality disorder here, and I have an extreme crying problem. I will tear or fully cry over rejection, criticism. aa harsh word, another (especially a child) being spoken harshly to…gawd, even TV commercials…I hurt, and I can’t help but tear up or bawl.

norma, its best to put this in ‘Start a post’at the top of the page..but Ill answer here cuz I may not find it….Is this normal for borderline P disorder? im not fimaliar with that. if you also laugh hard and uncontrollable too there is such a thing.sorry i dont know the name for it :/