Feel help: OK, my problem is I cry WAY too easily. - Help.com

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Sorry, I just got your request now. Perhaps isn’t the right time to ask me advice (it’s 3am of New Year’s Day here, I’m a little drunk. Lol) But I’ll try my best.

First off, what exactly do you cry over?

Well, I myself get panic attacks, and I can understand the emotion and stress they cause. That is nothing to be ashamed about. But how do you mean that your feelings get hurt too easily? Do you mean that you take critisism top harshly?

Yes, it certainly does make sense. I’m the same way. I’m extremely sensitive when people speak to me the wrong way, or I sense a tone in their voice that sets me off. My issues though, have to do with my past, may I ask, if it’s not too personaly, has anything happened in your past that may trigger it? Were you bullied at school? Did your parents cause some issues etc?

You don’t have to answer if you don’t feel comfortable doing so.

be happy you can cry trust me the worst feeling in the world is when you cant. crying is healthy so dont take it for granted when people subsitute things instead of crying or force themselves not to cry then there is no relief from the pain or whatever they are feeling. i can see where your getting at though but its no big deal i mean its who you are and some people cry more easier then others. take it as something you should be thankful for i for one have trouble crying because i subsituted cutting for it so its messed up my ability to cry for a while now. when i want to i just cant. so be happy that you can cry.

You get your self worth from what you think others think of you. If you don’t feel they accept you and like you, then you feel horrible. You have developed a lot of negative self-talk where you interpret things badly by reflex.

First, realize that others feel shy and insecure as well. Everyone has insecurity whether or not they admit it. When they see you unhappy, they naturally think you have some issue with them. They may react in a defensive way. You take that to mean they have a problem with you. It can be a self-fulfilling prophesy.

You need to develop a sense of self-worth that you can rely on regardless of what others may be thinking or feeling. That comes from setting little goals for yourself and meeting them. Exercise, socializing, working, hobbies, all of these things are important.

Never give in to fear. Each time you run away from a problem, you teach your brain that running away feels good. Each time you burst into tears and get sympathy from someone, you teach your brain to cry so you will be comforted or get off easier. You have to re-train your brain by using new behaviours to get better results. Your brain will learn to take action, ask questions, laugh, etc. instead of cry or run away.

You can do it!

careful with trying to fix yourself from crying too much, i used to cry too much, from everything, everything i was told, just hearing something sad, my dad helped me bro out when playing this card game once and they won against me, that made me cry. so i stopped, i stopped completely an now i haven’t cried for 6 years and it hurts, its like i don’t know how to, its like now everything’s going to be kept inside me and i cant get them out, bottled up.

i think although i may be wrong as i normally am, that you cry because you care, and caring is not a bad thing, but, if you care too much then you start doing things that well aren’t healthy. I’m not saying to stop caring, and become as cold as a stone, as i know are few people are to get over what they go through.

sometimes, well a lot of times you should never take things too personally, what people say and think are two different things. You sound like a nice caring sweet person, so remember smile, live life, try things!!! your life is yours, so remember to be happy, and be happy because you want to be!!!

soz soz if dis doesn’t actually help, im sleep deprived as usual lol

Sorry ,cant read all the replies, I may have given you this B4 but http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_… {{HUGS}}

Crying isn’t bad, but it isn’t fun either. My wife cries very easily, and has a hard time stopping. Because I have some background in biomedical neuroscience I have done some specific reading of papers on crying. Here’s what I have learned.

Crying is a response to stress. It can be flavored with any number of different emotions (fear, sadness, happiness, etc) but the essential trigger is stress. If you feel near to crying and something stressful happens you can be sure you will tip over into crying. My wife is afraid of crying and she used to become angry at herself when she cried. This naturally made her cry harder, because anger is stressful. As strong a person as she was, her natural instinct to tense up and force herself to stop crying was only making it worse, because it just strengthened the stress responses that were making her cry. Crying is like sliding in a car on a slick surface — trying to turn out of it right away just makes it worse, but if you turn with the slide you can regain control and stop the car.

Knowing this has helped my wife. She still cries easily (especially when she feels that someone is disapproving of her), but she recovers more easily because she has learned not to berate herself. I used to try to get her to stop crying by addressing the reason she started crying, but now I know that just holding her and giving her time to process her emotion works better. Once she feels calmer and safer, then we can talk about whatever is upsetting her.

The worst is when we beat ourselves up for not being good enough in some unrealistic way. My wife does that a lot. Anger can be hard to let go of, and self-anger is even harder. However, forgiveness and acceptance do the trick.

There are also some things you can do right away to feel better, if you don’t already. Avoid caffeine and energy drinks. Stimulants trigger the body’s stress response by increasing the neurotransmitter norepinephrine, the effect of which which is like getting a small shot of adrenaline. If you cry a lot, you don’t need any more norepinephrine floating around in you.

I say it a lot in different posts, but exercise is as close as you will ever find to a magic cure for intense worry and anxiety. You don’t have to be good at it, just find something that you can do to raise your heartrate for 45 minutes or so, and it will alleviate much of the stress that makes you cry and feel anxious. Running is simplest, but if there is something you enjoy more like dancing, yoga, or skiing, then that is even better.

I know this is a really long post, but I hear a lot of my wife’s experiences in what you said, and I hope that our experiences will benefit you.

tj, i marked yours as quoteable,great read, great advice :)

I totally understand you.. everyday nothing bad really happened I just can cry any time i “want” to….Help me plz, I want to be happy and stop this nonsense.

dragonhope198 wrote:
I totally understand you.. everyday nothing bad really happened I just can cry any time i “want” to….Help me plz, I want to be happy and stop this nonsense.

All you need is two things: focus on other people; commit to and chase goals. Whenever you are anxious, focus on other people’s problems and chase your own goals. Your fears are just sensations. Go ahead and feel them. Go ahead and cry. When you fight them, you make it worse. Let it out and don’t let them distract you.