Love help: Me and my ex had been together for 4yrs… in those for yrs i feel as if i took alot of mental abuse. - Help.com

Me and my ex had been together for 4yrs…

in those for yrs i feel as if i took alot of mental abuse. And i still chose to stay in that relationship… but here is the other side. After the first months into the 1st year, i kinda found out they were infected(HIV or AIDS not sure which one, but that didnt matter to me) but they were healthy and all. They didnt contract it while we were together, but just didnt tell me off the top when we first met… I can understand them being nervous to tell me, and im not a judgemental person, i just see people for who and what they “give me. SO after that intial phase i chose to stay, chose to love, and chose to be there… because i really did love, and was in love with this person. During this relationship i kinda isolated myself from my family friends and felt as if i was under some kinda “spell”. I just really went through hell with this person, while at the same time trying to find understanding and stil LOVE this person despite any and everything… Well i finally broke it off, it wasnt for cheating or anything like that, but i was just tired, tired of the mental abuse, and just tired of the relationship. I recieved counseling and therapy afterwards and moved back into my parents house. I was really messed up, to the point of suicide and just not WHO i was before the relationship… in any case i just feel as if, there is only so much a person can take before enough is enough. So when i broke it off, a decision was made to still be friends i was totally fine with that… All the while the person still tried to control my life, always asking where i was, who i was with, what i was doing and all this other crap that i had went through in the Relationship…All the while in the back of my mind im still thinking about this person needing support and someone to talk to. By now not only had they had the “VIRUS” but may have inhereited some type of cancer from their father, whom of which passed away while we were together… So im taking all this into condisderation, running myself ragged, feeling no respect, feeling taken advantage of, feeling used. If i give you my love and my heart, all i ask is that u respect me and care for me the same regardless of the situation. Finally they broke down and actualy told me they were sorry how they treated me, that they we sorry for how they made me feel, and what they had put me through. All they wanted NOW was for me to be there for them, cause they dont think they have long to live anymore, and from their appearance that might be true. I accepted the apology and told them that i never stopped supporting them or loving them, but it still doesnt make it up for the past. It still lingers in my head, and makes me angry sometimes. Im past the diseases, just dont take advantage of me, that can truly ruin a “GOOD” person… I know it did me. I dont know what to say anymore, or what to do… After all that you put me through, i still CHOOSE to talk, call, and associate myself with you and still get treated like crap. I mean do i have the wrong idea? or did i just set myself up here? Considering my ex’s situation and what they are going through, its only so much a person can take right? Every kinda relationship/friendship works 50/50? please help… Am i wrong?

This open post was written 11 months ago | V/U/S: 97, 1, 1 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Subscribe to Replies | Report Post

Love, relationship, illness, pain, recovery, life (Edit Tags) (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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