Please help me stop my dangerous addiction - Help.com

I’ve never met you okay; and I don’t know anything about you. But from these words you wrote here, I think your biggest problem is wanting attention. And you cut yourself to get attention.

It’s not a ‘deadly addiction’ and many people who cut themselves don’t tell anyone. Have you told anyone? And what is going on with you to make you cut yourself?

im rying to stop and ive been doing it for aprx. 2 yrs. i have cut my wrist before, but rite now, im looking for advice on how to tell my counselor tomorrow. i have told 3 friends and a frenemy. wen i started, my cousin had just tried suicide so she was in the hospital and then she moved in with us.now everthing is fine exept im in 8th grade, a loner, and i always get the nasty rumors spread about me.

Well the one person who can help you the most is your counselor. They must know you quite well (they’re good at guessing much about you and being right). They may already have an idea. I think you should just tell them You’ll feel better for it and they can start to work out how to help you.

no, ive only seen her twice, and im 14. so HOW should i say it?

I did that everytime i had problems. I remember how i felt immense satisfaction and somehow relieved after doing it. Then i stopped, oh i cant remember the reason why i stopped.. This is my worst post.. im not helping at all arent i.. :(

actually, u just proved to me that i CAN stop if i put my mind to it. thank you

if you really want to stop, and it sounds like you do, then realize there’s no addiction just your quitin…if you are doing it for attention there are better ways to get it…music,sports,ect..i have faith in you -look inside yourself and realize your strength -godbless

im not doing it for attention, i already exell in music sports and acedemics. im in advanced math

nobody’s really answered my ? yet. how do i tell my counselor?!

ask him to keep it discreet..private..just between the two of you..they are there to help understand and provide guidance but becareful…

wont he have to tell my mom, couse im a minor? or does this fall under patient-doctor confidentiallity?

mflzzlove wrote:
actually, u just proved to me that i CAN stop if i put my mind to it. thank you

Glad to help :)

mflzzlove wrote:
wont he have to tell my mom, couse im a minor? or does this fall under patient-doctor confidentiallity?

well, if youre a minor then big chance that he’ll call your mom.. Maybe you can find online counselor, person who cant find out who you are ? Or talk with us like youre doing now youre thinking of cutting yourself..

*When youre thinking of it..

i already txt one of my close friends and i promised her id tell my counseloer tomorrow at my appt.

cause she told hers

Okay dude the only way to deal with life is to be open and honest. You have to be open and honest not only with your counselor (if you want him to be able to help you) but also with yourself. Ask yourself why you are really having these issues? Go through the conversation with yourself and determine the real cause of your problems and then look for ways to accept it and move on from it. What ever is bothering you is eating you up inside. Unless you deal with it, confront it, and accept it you will never be able to move on from it and be a healthier happier person. Stop thinking that you have to hide your problems from the world. Open up and you will find acceptance and redemption. The only person who will hold you back in this struggle is you dude. I will be happy to talk to you as openly as you wish, but in the end what will really matter is whether you want to be open and honest with yourself. You can fix your worries and problems and if you need help figuring it out you have all of us, your family, and counselors to assist you. Best wishes dude.

ette. im a dudette. lol o well. thanksfor all ur help, im tired and going to sleep.

Sorry dudette :-) but it all still applies just replace dude with dudette :-)

i know. lol :-)

bye

sweet dreams then dudette :-)

Me being a mother, I would want my child to come to me with any kind of problem they may have. Your parents are your best supporters, and will do whatever it take for their child to be safe! I would go to my parents not a counselor.

i cant tell my parents. i dont know how they would react, but i know wat u mean.its just that im not ready to tell them,ya know?

Whats the worst that they could do? Nothing at all but HELP YOU! It would hurt me more knowing that my child had a problem and was ashamed or scared to come too me, but could go to a friend or a counselor, who plays no big part in their life like a mother or father does.

sorry if i offend u with this but it doesnt sound to me like you get it. i just dont want to hurt them, im not very close to my dad, yet im too close to my mom to tell her.

And what does cutting yourself solve, you still have the same problem, same worry, same everything, all you end up with is another bobo that didn’t solve anything at all!

you know how in middle school and high school, wen u cut class, or tried a ciggarette, or done something bad and u felt like u couldnt tell ur parents but u had to tell someone so u told ur friends? thats wat this is. i havent done it since aprx. Sun. i tried punching walls a couple times, but it always led back to cutting, and no offense, but ur not being very supportive of my choice to actually TELL and adult.

“Not offended at all” But they are your parents and they do love you, and Hurt them I doubt it, you’re 14 I am 26 yrs old, got a few years on you and been through a lot myself, I have had several friends do what you are doing to theirself, I completely understand, Let your guard down and go to your parents, the result will be more surprising than you think!!

Stop it now , You must lie to your counselor each time you see them if there not getting you to open up to them with your deepest troubles . I have a counselor and Im always open and honest with them , Its the only way to face your problems and deal with them .

It probably boils down to anxiety. Cutting will distract you from the feelings inside that make you uncomfortable. Cutting focuses your attention and gets your mind back in order.

The key is to recognize that anxiety is a problem and to focus on the feelings that come up, the tension inside, and the behaviour you indulge in when you feel those feelings: retreating, eating, cutting, etc.

Instead, retrain your brain. When you feel those feelings, you remind yourself they are just sensations over and over and over again. You get out and exercise. You go talk to people about stuff (not what you are worried about, instead about their lives). You listen to music.

This will train your brain to take different actions when you feel those feelings.

Cutting class, smoking cigarette, can not compare to you cutting yourself? Thats dangerous and scary what happens when you cut to deep and your paents find you dead, think of the pain you cause them then!

I’m just so worried only because your 14, you have yet to experience the hard times there is in this world and yet your already struggling. I really hope you make a good decision on your part, and get the help you need! Good Luck sweety!

they could send me to Prairie Saint Johns, which is NOt a very nice place. im the only kid in my close family who hasnt been to a place like that. my brother was abusive until last year. my cousin was majorly depressed cause her brother beat up on her (younger brother) im the golden child. supposed to be anyways. ive never cut class, only gotten detention once and im almost a straight-A student, im not supposed to go there

Nellie wrote:
Whats the worst that they could do? Nothing at all but HELP YOU! It would hurt me more knowing that my child had a problem and was ashamed or scared to come too me, but could go to a friend or a counselor, who plays no big part in their life like a mother or father does.

i have never lied to my counselor

Anonymous wrote:
Stop it now , You must lie to your counselor each time you see them if there not getting you to open up to them with your deepest troubles . I have a counselor and Im always open and honest with them , Its the only way to face your problems and deal with them .

im too scared too commit suicide, it would hurt too many people, and i hate hurting people if i can help it

Nellie wrote:
Cutting class, smoking cigarette, can not compare to you cutting yourself? Thats dangerous and scary what happens when you cut to deep and your paents find you dead, think of the pain you cause them then!

Like I said, you’re trying to control the sensations you are feeling by cutting yourself. You need to find new outlets. Those outlets should build your confidence and give you goals. Exercise, socializing, joining groups etc. will do that for you.

Nobody is perfect! Do you know why exactly you do it?

Nevermind just read your story again, whats your hobbies?

i sexually abused as a very young child by a baby-sitter, my brother was abusive (he almost killed me twice), and my parents fought all the time. then my mom would yell and my dad would yell and it scared me

im a cross- country runner but i have to take a year of rest cause i got plantarfasheitis

i also write poetry,draw, and write stories. im really good at all three, but i have a major writers block on my current story im working on

It’s sounds like a lot for a person to go through at such a young age. I was sexually abused by a cousin (didn’t tell anyone), my sister was the favorite, I never did anything right, parents argued all the time, money problems constantly, didn’t have the finest of things and we were dirt poor and lived in a shack, but it made me who I am today, I am a very stronger would who lives life to the fullest, graduated high school to prove to myself I could do, I did stuff to make myself happy not anyone else. Get your little mind busy and stay busy and start now as a new beginning and put everything else in the past!

Always know YOU are stronger than those thoughts and urges that come in your head, love your body that GOD has given you, take care of your body, so one day you can get married have some babies and raise them a different way, an happier way than what you have had!!

Nellie wrote:
It’s sounds like a lot for a person to go through at such a young age. I was sexually abused by a cousin (didn’t tell anyone), my sister was the favorite, I never did anything right, parents argued all the time, mother was very abusive towards me, money problems constantly, didn’t have the finest of things and we were dirt poor and lived in a shack, but it made me who I am today, I am a very stronger would who lives life to the fullest, graduated high school to prove to myself I could do, I did stuff to make myself happy not anyone else. Get your little mind busy and stay busy and start now as a new beginning and put everything else in the past!

Sorry to hear about the running problems. How about biking and swimming?

As for writer’s block, that’s anxiety again. I’ve been there many times. I recently tried an interesting exercise.

The idea is to sit down and write down all the things you are bitter about and keep at it. When you’re tired of it, keep doing more until you are utterly sick and bored of it. Then do some more. The key is to get all the bitterness out and express yourself.

I found myself expressing some feelings I’d kept submerged for years and I was crying even as I was typing. I’m a guy in my 30s and I don’t generally cry! Go ahead and rage at all the people who’ve wronged you, all the people who didn’t help and should’ve. Don’t edit yourself. Don’t make excuses for them. Just let it all out in this document you write. Cry, rage, express yourself.

“Linuxya” EXCELLENT advice! That would absoluetly help!

i want to be a pediatrition, you know the doctor who works with kids

oops, i have to go, my mom will be home soon, and im supposed to clean up cause i stayed home from school today.

heres one of my poems if youd like to read it (its dark, but its NOT based on my expeiriences)

in this black abyss that is my life,
all i want to do is cry,
let my feelings flow from a knife
and be happy once again.
so once again ill be sick
and let my tears run dry
let them run until thay run no more,
with my soul knocking on the Devil’s door
we’re forever playing ‘Ding Dong Ditch’ in this battle for my soul
and when its finally over,
my LIFE is what he stole

It’s Hard to Say

it’s hard to say
how hard it feels
when someone passes on,
but you have those to comfort you,
those who are not gone

you like them? i have more but i have to go, bye!
PS thx for all ur help

ok its two poems

Beautifully scary! Your good! Take your writing to higher places, you will be fine and grow into a wonderful person!

i write a new one each time i feel like doing it, it helps alot. so far i have like 3 of them. heres a happier one not an escape one

Heli Here, Heli There

i once said to a bird tha i found in a tree
i’ll soar like an eagle and i’ll fly like a bird

humans cant fly, dont be so absurd!

oh yeah, well I’ll prove it, i’ll build a machine,
with propellers on top, all painted green!
so i worked and i worked,
all morning and night,
till finally my eyes saw a beautiful sight!
i cried out “eureka!”
and marched straight to that tree
told that bird to come follow me
and when he refused i said what-are-ya, scared?
he just stared at me, he stared and he stared

birdie, birdie in a tree
we had a bet between you and me
now ya owe me two-times-three
and thats how the helicopter came to be

You’re very talented!

That was a fun read. more?

mflzzlove wrote:
i sexually abused as a very young child by a baby-sitter, my brother was abusive (he almost killed me twice), and my parents fought all the time. then my mom would yell and my dad would yell and it scared me

So was i, but ive never told it to anyone. Only me, and my spiritual counselor friend (PBUH) knew it >eventhough i never told him

wonder just how many people are afraid to admit it? Is it that common, or just common for help.comers?

Yep, me to. 6 months ago it sent me into panic attack even considering thinking about the posiblity that it happened. Now, thanks to people like you, I’m past it, its not a big deal anymore.

hey friend..i wrote this ..well praye after my siter was raped..i wanted to go kill the guy but this really helped me out
Dear God:
can U hear me?..are u near?..i want to make this clear..U who i hold so dear have kept me from any true fear..cuz its everyday that i realize its U keeping me alive..so i strive to be the best..not over the rest but to pass lifes test..it is U who gives me everlasting strength..i pray that i never have to go to that length..the length of sorrow..please if it happens let me borrow..Ur love and happiness..please bless my family and friends..God ..i really want to make amends..please..pretty please remove my sins and help me live again..in Jesus’ name i pray..Amen

here’s another i wrote to my other sis whe she got really drepressed:

hey little sister don’t trip

U jus need 2 equip

Ur mind, heart, body and soul

common get Ur head outta thu bowl

U know what U need 2do

don’t feel blue i’m with U

thu next step is easy jus start prayin

might sound cheezy but listen 2what i’m sayin

if U truly want thu best

never settle 4less

but B careful cuz “not all that glitter is gold”

jus stick 2righteousness an all thu answers will unfold

-luv ya

and here’s one for us poets…us friends..us people in these tryin times:

blessins:
my blessins 2those who carry a burden an R truly hurtin… it is in these tryin times we come 2find who our friends really R bet…please believe i’m not far, if U ever need me..i’ll gladly B there with open arms an understandin… -one love

i vent alot of my frustrations out on www.youtube.com/ghanjahman with my rhymes check it out …might be somethin Ur into ..hope i’ve helped -peace

dont be afraid just tell ppl and get help from professionals as well dont go around asking what to do caz you think your not in control so you want ppl to tell you how to stop tho you are in control of your emotions and actions you can control how things affect you.

multalations is often for attention though not always its also some signs of possible bi polar disorder tho often times cutting is merely a habit because of the high you get when the pain releases your endorphins giving you a bit of euphoria or high feelings.

think of thos three possibilities most of all get help i hope shes a consular that helps you develop good coping methods instead of just talking >.> thos are the crappy ones that just only talk

yikes.. doesnt that hurt o_o

sun light streams in the window
glinting off your hair
you wear it to your chin
swept forward in your eyes
i stare at you till class is done
and then i stare some more
you caught me looking that one time
the time you held my gaze
a smile playing in your sparkling eyes
your eyes are green
i noticed then
i never had before
it happened again the next day
and once more after that
till finally you stopped me after class
and asked if we could talk
it ended up being more than that
i found your lips on mine

wrote this one recently, shortly after i told my mom.

it hurt only when i first started. after a while, i kind of enjoyed the pain. its sick i know, but its true

i havent done it for over a month

a flower here
a flower there
pull the weeds up tight
let the flowers grow
and reach the sky
and let them rest at night
they stretch and yawn
in the dawning sun
and bathe till the day is gone
sleeping peacefully at night
dreaming sweetly in pale moonlight

wrote that two days ago