forgiveness help: Letting go of your past! - Help.com

I hope I can let go of the painful memories of the past. But with the happy and blessed ones, I will cling to it for life.

Nice post. Lovely avatar.

I never forgive myself for anything, I think I just like the mental torture it brngs, who knows.
I find it easy to forgive others for what they do or say but as for myself, I doubt I will ever give myself a break.

Freelance Supergirl wrote:
Thank you

I have used these 6 steps to help me, it may help you as well

1. Write, talk, draw, paint, or otherwise tap into your thoughts and memories.

2.Letting go of your past means honoring your memories.

3.Let go of the emotions and feelings of painful memories by letting them wash over you – you’ll feel horrible during, but relieved and peaceful afterwards. Let go of your past by reliving it.

4.Go back and talk to the people involved, if possible. Letting go of your past can mean going back.

5.Share your real feelings; confess if it’s appropriate. Letting go of your past means expressing your emotions. If you have to deal with your mistakes, then own up to your shame or guilt.

6.Apologize and ask forgiveness if you need to. Letting go of your past means being vulnerable. Letting go of your past means burying your pride.

Thank you so much! :p

Healing slowly is right. It’s 24+ years and still not entirely healed. Will it ever?

Yea, that forgiveness is what I need to keep working on. The poor guy IS in maximumsecurity jail for life! I should really pity him! ( I do actually).

Well, he’s actually in for something else. He never got taken to task for what he did to me.

What do you mean? He IS locked up for life which is where that kind of person needs to be!

I see! :) Well, wasn’t really planning to spill the story here anyway! lol

I loved this post. I’m going to copy those steps and try them.

We all have our embarrassing moments. Things we did that we should have known not to do, things we say that were said in anger that hurt the ones we love, things we can never fully explain because it looks like we’re defending a ridiculous point.

And then there are the things others do to us? People we don’t even know. People that hate life or disregard it so much it’s nothing for them to injure without impunity, without a second thought or even a glance. Those are the ones I find it so hard to forgive!

Those are the ones that have made me see the real value of life, so maybe I’ve answered my own question here? Through their actions my eyes were opened, so yes, maybe I do owe them, maybe I should work on the forgiveness part of that memory.

Hmmm… something to think about, as I spoon feed you, lol..

I’m sorry that it took me so long to reply, I read it days ago but waited to think before I replied.. Thanks.. it’s a wonderful post..

Maybe I’ll tell you that story in the near future.. it is something to think about from an outside viewpoint..

Hi. I just wanted to tell you that sometimes life just sucks. That said, I wanted to share with you that there was a time when I found myself divorced and I thought it was going to kill me… It was the worst thing that ever happened to me and it turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me. I finally realized I was the only person who had the answers… I was just too hurt to see. I saw that I was alone, and whatever happened in my life from that day forward was only going to happen if I so chose to make a decision and enact true and lasting change in my life. I reevaluated everything and saw a whole new perspective. I saw that even though I was lost, I was free to do whatever I wanted. I reevaluated my hopes dreams and set goals FOR ME. I left my home town and I have been chasing down my dreams ever since. I finally found my purpose and true path in life and I am thankful for the heartbreak which served as the impetus for becoming who I am today.
Ill stop there as Ive taken up too much space as it is… I hope you find what youre looking for, you may not yet know what it is, but asking this question tells me youre on your way..
All the best…

can you let go of the past and hope it will return the way you wanted it to be, yet still be letting go of the past?

I dont know if holding on to the way “it was”, is actually letting go… but I do know that letting go is often the most we can ask for. I might have had a more cheery answer last week but I lost my 11 year companion (my pup) a couple of days ago and Id give anything to have him back. Sometimes what we want is irrelevant to a plan for us we lack the capacity to fully understand. Hold on to the idea that there is love all around, even if we cannot see it… When we need to see it most. Please dont lose sight of those in your life that do love you, even when the one you want love from most for whatever reason is incapable of reciprocity.

i dont know if i can do that, i’d like to though.
when i had my girlfreind through bad times and good, i always knew she was there. my best friend, now shes not even that, we spent almost all our time together but now its gone and i dont really have a social network anymore. How to move forward…
i’d love her back but i dont think she wants me to be honest

probably time to let go to be honest.
she needs to do her **** so she can feel like she thinks she needs to, i need to get a handle on life again. probably universally true of all non-brutal breakups.

that is so nice for you to say, doesn’t mean that it can truly ever be forgotten. It doesnt mean you will heal and move on. I think it just means you will move on. The heal never can be fixed!

what if your past involves something very hurtful that someone said to you in a tough situation and it changed you for the worst and caused many, many problems even years down the road?

Thanks for sharing this with me! U’re right I do need to forgive myself…I’ve sort of become something I’ve always told myself I wouldnt. I guess because of my past is partly the reason I feel so worthless and replacable now. Thanks for sharing this post it made a lot of sense:)

Thanks it definately makes you think? How can you forget the past when the addictive relationship you are running from contacts you everyday?