Move out. Get off the pills. Hold grudges and stay away from them before you end up in the hospital again. Send them the bill for the last hopital visit.
that’s horrible! you should never hold grudges! talk it out with them and yes, stay away from the drugs. if you really want to do something about it then move out. forgive and, not always forget. but still, work it out so you can once again have a healthy relationship. best of luck to you!
Things are not that simple. We have a contract that I cannot break, coz that would mean a fine that I can’t afford at the moment. So, moving out is just not an option.
And I know it’s really bad, but it’s a trait of my personality to hold grudges. I’m working on my attitudes toward the problems, I’m trying not to take things to heart. Suggestions?
Burn the apartment building while no one is looking and you will be free! Well maybe that’s not the best advice, you could very easily end up in jail forever… yeah forget that plan.
of course if you took a handfull of pills right before you did it you could always plead temporary insanity.
hahahha
the pills are not that strong ;)
dr. ralph dont you ever have anything useful to say? instead of spouting the same old garbage.
southern traveller what exactly is the cause of friction between you and your housemates?
fcell04,
We r 3 very different people. We are all teachers living together. The girl has a very strong personality, just like mine, and sometimes she can’t keep her mouth shut and says things that really hurt, like “You make me tired”. I don’t think she knows how cruel she is sometimes. The guy is very immature and besides, a dirty person, with whom I have to share a bathroom. If his stinky towels were the only problem, I’d be happy, but he doesn’t know when he has to stop joking and he’s extremely inconvenient at times. For example, he doesn’t know when to stop making jokes about my partner’s age, which bothers me and yes, I told this to him.
I accept the fact that I get hurt because I like them and they r people who r somehow important to me, but, as I said before, I have this tendency to hold grudges and not talk things over.
I’m afraid of having another nervous breakdown. Now things are ok here, but, who knows tomorrow?
fcell04 I’m just trying to make the poster in a better mood with some sarcasm. I think it helps… just don’t read my posts if they offend you. I think they’re funny quit taking everything so seriously. Maybe she should pass some of those pills to you!
fcell04 wrote:
dr. ralph dont you ever have anything useful to say? instead of spouting the same old garbage.
southern traveller what exactly is the cause of friction between you and your housemates?
thank you!
Sorry southerntraveller, “he” it is… Whattsa matta tay, you need some pills too? Get over yourselves.
yeah dr ralph I am sure another poster felt great when his marriage was breaking down and you told him he blew it. I wouldnt want to cry on your shoulder when I needed cheering up but I will take your advice and stop reading your posts from now on.
Anyway southern traveller have you asked your male flatmate about trying to keep things respectable in the bathroom? does he leave the communal areas dirty aswell such as the kitchen? If so do you know if your other housemate is irked by this? maybe you could both talk to him about it.
About the personality issues there is really not much you can do if you are having personality clashes with your housemates, maybe it is better if you moved out. I was best friends with a guy for 10 years and we moved in together and within a week we got into a punch up. Some people just aren’t meant to live together.
Holding grudges is just going to make things much worse my advice would be to try talking to your housemates again and if things dont improve then start thinking about moving out.
He DID blow it, if they don’t want the truth they shouldn’t ask. I’m pretty sure I told this guy to move out and get off the pills an hour ago. Thanks for your kind suggestions, though. I’ll certainly use them as I see fit.
Dr. Ralph wrote:
Sorry southerntraveller, “he” it is… Whattsa matta tay, you need some pills too? Get over yourselves.
no my dear, it’s good you’re trying to make light about this topic, but if it were I who was asking for serious help, i would want a serious “get to the point” answer. that’s all :)
Read the first post on this blog. It’s serious, it’s to the point, and it’s mine.
well of course, but do you really think that holding grudges is the way to go? clearly not. I’m not going to argue with you because this post is not about YOU, it’s about helping the poster.
southerntraveller, if the arguments do not clear up, (i know this sounds lame) but maybe seeking professional help would be good for all of you. even having a sit down with the 2 of them and go over your terms of living arrangements.
If holding a grudge means staying away from people that drove him to the hospital for tranquilizers then yes, I think it is the way to go.
fecll04,
Yes, the guy leaves the communal areas dirty as well (especially the kitchen). And yes, we talked to him, but it seems to have little effect.
tay_br,
I totally agree with u and I know holding grudges is not the way to go. I don’t mean to be rude, but when it comes to real life, it’s easier said than done, especially when it is a trait of your personality. I am trying hard, hosnestly.
What do you mean by professional help to all of us? A counselour or sth like this?
Ralph,
There are things that have happened that I forgive or will forgive, but others I’ll never forget and that doesn’t mean holding a grudge. But if we forget everything bad people have done to us, we become stupid, right? I think that’s your point.
How I was sent to hospital
We all had had a big argument the day before (and in front of another person). Then, I was going to bed, and my male rommie was talking to the female one (he has this huge need to be always approved by her,I don’t understand why) to clear things up. At that time of the night, I just didn’t want to be part of that conversation, but I couldn’t help overhearing.
Let me explain sth first. I am a sleepwalker. I told them since the very beginning, before living with them. At that time, that was my point to have my own room and not to share 1 with the guy. Ok, point not taken and in the end, I was there sharing the room with him.
One of the things that I overheard was that he was extremely bothered, because sometimes, in the middle of the night, I went to his bed and once I kissed him on the neck. I highlight that I was TOTALLY UNCONSCIOUS and when I woke up, I apologized and went straight to my bed, ashamed. This happened because I miss my partner, and my rommate said that he thinks I have a kind of hidden crush on him.I had never heard sth so ridiculous in my entire life. Both said some things I didn’t like behind my back that day, this was just one of them, probably the most ridiculous one.
Then, on the following day, I fainted in the elevator while I was leaving home to work (and got unconscious for about 1 hour).
This is the story.
Oh that really is a problem. How about having another house meeting and summing the situation up that none of ye are happy at the moment and that prehaps by changing the sleeping situation some of the unsettlement in the house could be sorted. But i really think prehaps you should try and see if someone else can move into the house and you move out that way and it might not effect the contract.
The sleeping situation is no longer a problem because of the pills I take.
Things have been quite calm here in my house, guys, i just don’t know when another bom will explode…
It just not healthy to be on pills. . . .do the guy know that all this is effecting you so much?? The only other this to do is try and be light hearted about the whole thing and try and not dwell on it too much but it must be uncomfortable all the same.
Where i leve one of the guys is really really neat and tidy and it used to drive him mad how after a cuppa tea id leave the spoon in the sink or leave the cup at the side. My resoning was that i drink around 10 cups a day so when im boliling the kettle for the next one id clean the last. But any way i found out that this really annoyed him so now i always make an extra effort to clean up. It was easiers than having tension in the house.
So maybe if each of ye can identify one thing ye can do or change it would make everyone happier! Living with people is awkward but it all about adjusting and there will annoy ya.
Right now I have no choice, I feel I really need the pills.
And no, I think they have no idea about the metal agony I’ve been through. How could I tell them and look at their faces the day after? How can u tell people that they r partially responsible for ur condition and still live with them? I really dont know.
Now things r alright, I just don’t know ’till when. The guy is trying to be more clean (little result, to be honest) and I’m trying not to take things to heart.
Well if you need them you need them your sanity is most important!!! Is your contract for mush longer??
Up to 2011, but I think we’ll break it before…
diddles