Love help: I’ve just split up with my boyfriend of 18 months and I don’t know if I will regret it. - Help.com



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I’ve just split up with my boyfriend of 18 months and I don’t know if I will regret it.

I feel like crap about it.
Basically a lot has happened recently, we both moved to Brighton together for uni but it didn’t work out (due to the courses) and while we were there something changed, it was a strange situation to be in, meeting new ppl etc. We stopped having fun together, had a few big arguments. I was far too stressed and he wasn’t helping me destress and never suggested anything for us to get out of the house.
Now we’re back home I decided to give it another shot but nothing changed, if anything it got worse, our sex life was zero, I felt like we were a 50 yr old married couple. Therefore I didn’t find him physically attractive anymore and felt like I fell out of love with him. So i split up with him - didnt go down well, harsh words were spoken - but now it feels so real I’m so upset because I just want things to go back to the way they were, i’d give anything to be in love with him again. I just don’t know if I’m going to regret this because I know that its impossible to go out with someone for years and years and still have that spark. He’s my best friend and I miss him terribly but I dont know if i miss him as a boyfriend purely because, well, he wasn’t really one during the end of our relationship..all we did was sit and watch tv really. Im not sure what kind of help i’m asking for… would be nice to know if anyone’s been in a similar situation. We’ve spoken in depth about our problems and he said he’d change and I do believe him. Basically I dont know whether it’s worth giving it another go perhaps to discover that even if he’s changed, the lack of romantic chemistry would make me feel awkward like I was dating a friend.
I have never been this confused. I’m gutted.

This open post was written 8 months ago | V/U/S: 450, 1, 1 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Anonymous edited this post 8 months ago. Read the previous text »

I’ve just split up with my boyfriend of 18 months and I don’t know if I will regret it. I feel like crap about it.
Basically a lot has happened recently, we both moved to Brighton together for uni but it didn’t work out (due to the courses) and while we were there something changed, it was a strange situation to be in, meeting new ppl etc. We stopped having fun together, had a few big arguments. I was far too stressed and he wasn’t helping me destress and never suggested anything for us to get out of the house.
Now we’re back home I decided to give it another shot but nothing changed, if anything it got worse, our sex life was zero, I felt like we were a 50 yr old married couple. Therefore I didn’t find him physically attractive anymore and felt like I fell out of love with him. So i split up with him - didnt go down well, harsh words were spoken - but now it feels so real I’m so upset because I just want things to go back to the way they were, i’d give anything to be in love with him again.I do believe him. I just don’t know if I’m going to regret this because I know that its impossible to go out with someone for years and years and still have that spark. He’s my best friend and I miss him terribly but I dont know if i miss him as a boyfriend purely because, well, he wasn’t really one during the end of our relationship..all we did was sit and watch tv really. Im not sure what kind of help i’m asking for… would be nice to know if anyone’s been in a similar situation. Basically I dont know whether it’s worth giving it another go perhaps to discover that even if his attitude/actions change, the lack of romantic chemistry would make me feel awkward like I was dating a friend. I have never been this confused. I’m gutted.

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