Family help: My family (some of them are pissed at me for wanting my sister to go to prison for the rest of her life. - Help.com

I recall that i responded to a post of you like this before, and this was pretty recent.

They’re asking you to forgive already? that’s strange you lost your mom for crying out loud, i don’t know if i’d ever be able to forgive let alone forget. As a mather effect, i’d mostlikely go eye for an eye. “though i know this is not the way”

Alicia, if i’m allowed to call you by name, your family is insane! downright bloody crazy. Nothing to do about it. I can just say that what you’re feeling is normal.

Try to find rest in the people you do trust, and strength trough memory of your mother.

It’s murder, and on such senseless grounds too. Forgive when you’re ready but never forget, and yes you deserve justice, i’d kick her to jail myself.

And feeling sorry for her is absolutely senseless at this point.

Once again my condolences, Demanufacture.

I agree with you and you have every right to feel the way you do. Is there a good lawyer trying to prosicute her? Perhaprs they could sentence her to life in a mental hospital?

if i wer u id just get the hell away from ur family altogether, obv something wrong for ur sis to stab ur mom,no offence but its usually the way your brought up.Somethng tells me u aint a very respected family. sorry just sayin how it is.

Anonymous wrote:
if i wer u id just get the hell away from ur family altogether, obv something wrong for ur sis to stab ur mom,no offence but its usually the way your brought up.Somethng tells me u aint a very respected family. sorry just sayin how it is.

alicia_smile23 wrote:
you know nothing about how we were raised or how GREATLY my family is respected!

Yeh that was a bit rude. anybody can get addicted to drugs “yes i did read the full post” and drugs can destroy you and all those around you.

But that doesn’t mean something went wrong in the way they were brought up.

Sublety is adviced in a situation like this.

Alicia i hope this never happens to me, couse i can attempt to understand how you must be feeling, but we both know that thats imposible.

Still, best of luck,

Greets and regards, D.

It is not at all surprising that an event like this could tear a family apart and set you all to disagreeing and sniping at each other. There have been some violent crimes in my family as well–although not one as horrendous as what you describe.

I wish I could give you a simple solution, but obviously there isn’t one.

I think the best that you can do is to acknowledge that you have all been hurt, you have all been damaged, and you all have very strong emotions about what has happened and very strong opinions about what should be done. Then you must all try—very, very, very hard—to set aside the urge to prove that you are “right” and someone else is “wrong”—and instead turn your attention to caring for each other, supporting each other, forgiving each other, and loving each other.

If you can possibly do so, I think you should arrange for a counselor (a mental-health worker and/or a spiritual counselor or clergy person) to work with you as a family. Otherwise, just gather for a weeping fest and direct all your energies toward comforting each other and moving on in a positive way. You still have the rest of your lives together.

Honestly, Alicia, the attorneys and the police and the courts and the psychiatrists will probably sort out what is going to happen to your sister. I say it day after day on this site, and I am going to say it again now: You need to understand that your CAN’T control everything that happens in life, and you can’t control other people’s behavior. What you CAN do is try to control your own response to the circumstances.

You have already lost your mom, and it seems that you have also lost your sister. I urge you NOT to lose the rest of your family. Instead, do your best to be the glue that holds your family together. These are horrible times for all of you; you all need each other. My prayer for you is that you will start to minister to each other, and that love will heal you in the end.

You’re welcome—my best wishes and prayers are with you.

just wanted to check in and see how you were doing.