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I told my best friend that I’m in love with her.
I built up the courage to tell her on my birthday and all she could say she was speechless. Since then we haven’t really talked about it and I’ve felt really awkward around her. I feel like so distant ever since I told her. I’m extremely confused on what I should do now..
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
she doesn’t seem interested..so maybe you probably shouldn’t mention to her. if the awkwardness persists then maybe confront her about it.
Give her a little time — maybe a couple of weeks if you normally speak on a daily basis — and she will discover for herself whether she feels (or can feel) the same. I suggest this if you’re sensing her discomfort around you; I mean the kind of discomfort one feels when trapped in a conversation they’d rather not have, or giving short, almost upset answers to questions. I don’t mean the kind of awkward, shy discomfort of not knowing what to say to someone you admire. That’s different, and would mean you should pursue her. If she seems upset, or like she’s thinking ‘ugh, I hate this’ though, I’d suggest pulling back completely (while making it clear beforehand that you would be happy for her to give you a call, talk, etc.). I was in a similar situation 10 years ago. I told him I loved him, but he didn’t feel the same. It wasn’t horribly awkward, but disappointing for me, to say the least. Well, we eventually dated, but he was wrapped up in a past relationship in his mind, and so after a while I had to say, ‘Sorry, I love you, but I can’t do this anymore’. For the first time in 3 years, I didn’t call him for two weeks. That was a big deal. I felt I’d finally realized he would never feel the same, and needed to get on with life. After two and a half weeks of not speaking, he called me and wanted me then. The time away had helped him really sort through his feelings, and only then could he discover my value to him. We have been married 10 years in June.
Aw, what a nice story! Where did the star thing go from the top right corner of your post???? darn. I wanted to save it as a “favorite”.
Well here’s the whole story.
We first met in high school where we would talk and see each other every now and then just to say hi. We never really started talking much up until prom where her and her boyfriend were having problems. At an after party is when everything kind of took a turn for me. She got extremely drunk and was running around the house wildly. I spent most of the night trying to stop her until when I finally did she kissed me. As the night went on I did my best to avoid her and her boyfriend. Now after graduating and summer coming up, her boyfriend was going to film school (she is a year younger than me by the way) so he broke up with her. So during summer there were a lot of arguments and most of her friends and my friends took her ex’s side. I don’t like taking sides, but I stayed with her. For most of summer I was there to comfort her and help her out. When her parents were out of town I even stayed the night in the same bed. Not much of a big deal nothing happened. Summer eventually ends and around October I don’t know what really came over me but we hooked up twice. Once at my house and once in my car. We don’t really talk about it after. Between this time and Thanksgiving her and her ex get back together once again. Leaving me to feel kind of used, but around Thanksgiving me and her boyfriend help her and her family move across the valley. He helps for 2-3 days and I’m there everyday morning til night. Around this time I got really close with her family for helping out. They actually didn’t want me to leave for awhile even after they finished moving. So a few days after they move, my mom throws me out of the house and this girls family actually lets me stay. They give me a bed and everything and I just help them out by taking them places and taking their daughter to school. Now, a few weeks ago she got a job. She always talks about her boss who is the same age as I am and I was getting jealous. I’ve been having mixed feelings about her. We’re extremely close and talk about almost anything. On my birthday I told her how I really felt and she said she was speechless. For me there has been an awkward feeling every time I sit with her and we don’t talk. Before, Even when I left for a day and came back the next she used to say how much she missed me. Now I leave for a week at a time and I don’t get anything. Just thinking about everything that has happened and thinking I have to give it up makes me stomach churn..
Maybe she really likes the boss a lot and is afraid of hurting you. She SURE IS sending mixed signals! If you were good enough to hook up with TWICE, and be on her side during her hard times, and help her family to move and to drive her places, and be her confidante, then you are practically dating anyway.
I’d ask her what is going on in her pretty little head. Tell her that it took a lot of courage to open up to her and to tell her that you love her. Tell her that you don’t know why it surprised her after everything mentioned above. Ask her if she thinks that you have a chance with her. And if she says no, ask WHY. You might want to know what the problem is so that you don’t sit and think about it for too long.
Thanks everyone for your help but I think I’m being replaced by her boss..
She told me she liked me back in September, but now she just sees me as a brother and nothing more.
i first started high school and the first time i saw emma i thorght the was something about her i didnt no what it was we got closer and closer i just had to be with her all the time and when i got home all i thorght about was her when she was upset i tryed really hard to make her feel better atfer a while i got to no her better and she asked me if we were best friends i said yeahh i only just realized im in love with her . she really likes me but i dont think shes in love with me i
want to tell her but i dont no how to what would i say?? and then what?? i love her soo unbelivably much! i just dont want to losse her but i dont to be thnking what if for the rest of my life :((
Tell her that you really like having her around. Ask if she wants to see a movie sometime. You’ll know by her reaction how she feels. At the end, tell her that you’d love to do it again sometime. See what she says.
Well this just happened to me!!! We have been best friends for two years now! We talk ever day and see each other every weekend. We are so close and on Saturday i told her that im in love with her. Well it did’nt go down well, i think she was more shocked than anything but now i can tell something is wrong. Her answers are short and she does’nt sound the same. This is driving me crazy, i should’nt have told her. I can’t loose her as a friend, i would rather have just her friendship than nothing at all. I need help, any suggestions?????
I love my best friend…..but she has a bf
I told her yesterday how i felt about her.
Hanging out with her is really getting awkward ever since i told her the truth.
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