angry dad help: My dad has always got anger issues but its got to a point now

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My dad has always got anger issues but its got to a

point now where I feel like I need to confront him, but I’m just scared of him like the rest of the family is. He has never hit us before but he’s always angry and moody over little things. e.g. last night he was kicking the bathroom door because my brother was using the bathroom when he wanted to use it. Afterwards he was swearing at my brother (who is 12) and everyone else in teh house. He was also angry with my mum because she had gone to bed early and he wanted her to keep him company but it was about 1.30am and she was tired because she does all the housework all day (unlike him who does **** all). And why would she want to keep him company when hes so angry. That night he broke the souvenir that me and my sister bought for my mum. He’d broken a lot of my mums things in the past and she has gotten upset about it a lot. He’d broken her cute biscuit tin she bought from Japan, scribbled all over her teddies, and broke her mobile phone chair we bought her. I remember one time when we were little, he got a hammer and smashed the wooden frame of my sisters bed (although he fixed it afterwards)… Its sick because he acts all normal and happy the morning after and everyones too scared to ask him about it because they don’t want to get him angry again. i don’t know what to say exactly so, maybe this:

“dad, why are you always breaking things when your angry. You don’t have to break our things to show us how angry you are because we already know. DO u know how upset u make us and especially mum? How do u expect us to respect you when, u don’t respect us. If your angry can you break your own stuff instead please. Also what kind of message do you think your teaching us (especially out little brother), are you trying to tell us that it’s ok to break other peoples things. I hope you think twice before breaking other peoples things next time if you dont want your whole family to hate you”.

sorry this message is sooo long!

This open post was written 7 months, 4 weeks ago | V/U/S: 696, 9, 8 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Anonymous edited this post 7 months, 4 weeks ago. Read the previous text »

My dad has always got anger issues but its got to a point now where I feel like I need to confront him, but I’m just scared of him like the rest of the family is. He has never hit us before but he’s always angry and moody over little things. e.g. last night he was kicking the bathroom door because my brother was using the bathroom when he wanted to use it. Afterwards he was swearing at my brother (who is 12) and everyone else in teh house. He was also angry with my mum because she had gone to bed early and he wanted her to keep him company but it was about 1.30am and she was tired because she does all the housework all day (unlike him who does **** all). And why would she want to keep him company when hes so angry. That night he broke the souvenir that me and my sister bought for my mum. He’d broken a lot of my mums things in the past and she has gotten upset about it a lot. He’d broken her cute biscuit tin she bought from Japan, scribbled all over her teddies, and broke her mobile phone chair we bought her. I remember one time when we were little, he got a hammer and smashed the wooden frame of my sisters bed (although he fixed it afterwards)… Its sick because he acts all normal and happy the morning after and everyones too scared to ask him about it because they don’t want to get him angry again. i don’t know what to say exactly so, maybe this:

“dad, why are you always breaking things when your angry. You don’t have to break our things to show us how angry you are because we already know. DO u know how upset u make us and especially mum? How do u expect us to respect you when, u don’t respect us. If your angry can you break your own stuff instead please. Also what kind of message do you think your teaching us (especially out little brother), are you trying to tell us that it’s ok to break other peoples things. I hope you think twice before breaking other peoples things next time if you dont want your whole family to hate you”.

sorry this message is sooo long!

Anonymous changed the tags on this post: they were "" 7 months, 4 weeks ago.

ArioneEleison 2 #
An Unknown Location | 7 months, 4 weeks ago (5 minutes after post)

As long as I live I never think I’ll ever understand my dad. But be honest with him try to talk to him, and if he gets angry, just tell him that you love him, and won’t fight with him, if he wants to be angry let him be angry but don’t bite back, it just makes everything build into a conflict….

I don’t know what you wrote sounds pretty good, but just make sure you let him knows you love him and don’t want to fight with him.

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Grim_Hardcastle 21 #
An Unknown Location | 7 months, 4 weeks ago (31 minutes after post)

Actually i think that he might got some issues he needs to work on. My dad was also very angry in the past. He stopped beeing angry some time after my mom kicked him out. Now i got a much better relationship with him. Still i don`t know the cause of his anger back in the days but as long as we`re all better off now i don`t want to bring it all up.

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charly9 #
An Unknown Location | 7 months, 4 weeks ago (59 minutes after post)

Hi,
Well I honestly know how you feel,
and i think you should definately confront him with the rest of your family,
maybe at a time when he is less angry,
and maybe have an excuse for you and your family to get out of the house if he gets angry because by the time you have got back he will have had time to cool down and think about what you and your family have said to him, he might even say sorry!
but whatever happens you will know that you gave it a go because other wise you will regret not saying it.
I hope this helps, sorry if it hasn’t:(
x

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pashmina.love 2 #
An Undisclosed Location | 7 months, 4 weeks ago (1 hour, 17 minutes after post)

Hey there,

Don’t worry about the length of your posts, there will always be people here who will read it through regardless of the length and help you out as much as they can. =)

Hmm, it seems like your dad’s really prone to anger and he’s even lashing it out on you and your family. To be quite honest, my father was like that too before he left me and my family a while ago. So in that respect, I think I can understand what you’re going through.

My dad had his ups and lows. I mean when he’s in a good mood, he would treat me like a princess, but when he’s not, he can make my life a living nightmare with him screaming and shouting at me for no reasons, and throwing things around in the house.

I know he still loves me and my family, but his work and stress has gotten the better of him at times. Just like my dad, I know your dad really needs the love and support of his family, and there’s no better way of expressing it than through open communication. Tell him that you love him very much and that you really want to help him with whatever that’s troubling him. Tell him that even if it’s something that you can’t do much about, you will always be there to listen and comfort him. I never had the courage to do that, but I know that had I done that, my dad would have never left me.

I also suggest taking him to family counseling and maybe anger managements will be what he needs. But most importantly, always be there for him when he needs you and always let him know that you’ll love him no matter what. Even if he is a grown man, he’s still sensitive and fragile inside. And love is what will really mend the wounds between the two of you.

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spiritedsoul 4 #
Sandgate, G5, GB | 7 months, 4 weeks ago (5 hours, 27 minutes after post)

I wudnt say ur dads anger is the issue, but its the way he’s dealing with it which is the problem. if ur family are at home living with fear than this is not a healthy lifestyle and u shudnt be in a place with an atmosphere like this.
can u go and see a doctor or a professional who can give good advice?

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bethanyhall #
An Unknown Location | 2 months ago (5 months, 3 weeks after post)

My dad is the EXACT same way, he broke my moms only memory of her parents she had. and he hits us, and what not. But he never once said sorry to us for ANYTHING.
And when we pay alot of money for pets, he takes them off.
But what i think you need to do is sign him up for anger management, because my family did that, and our family is like two peas and a pod.

GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR FAMILY. AND SORRY, I’M ALITTLE LATE WITH THAT.):

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