boyfriend help: my boyfriend and i are going through some tough issues, and he wants to end it. - Help.com



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my boyfriend and i are going through some tough issues, and he wants to end it.

he’s telling me that his gut feeling is telling him that he needs to get out of it.
however, my gut feeling is telling me that breaking up is the wrong thing to do.
we’ve been dating for almost 2 1/2 years, and love eachother very much.
we’re physically, and emotionally compatible. we’ve been fighting more due
to added stress, but it’s been getting better. i do believe that something in our
relationship needs to change, but i don’t think such a huge step is necessary.
he’s confused because his gut is telling him to go, but his head and heart are are
telling him to stay. we almost completely ended it last night, and we were still
joking and laughing with eachother during it, and these two emotions just don’t go
together. he’s saying the only reason he thinks we should break up is this weird gut
feeling, but nothing else is wrong. and there’s no other girl in the picture. please give me some advice!

This open post was written 7 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 158, 4, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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linuxya offline Verified User (2 years, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 7 months, 1 week ago (13 minutes after post)

Anxiety always tells us to quit when things get tough.

The key is to work through the anxiety… then you get stronger. As long as you run away whenever you feel anxious, you just develop a pattern.

What you need are tools to deal with your conflicts. Accept that emotions happen but that they also lie. You can be angry with someone even though it’s not their fault. You don’t have to blame others for your emotions or needs.

Get some books like the Mars and Venus books from John Gray, or When Good Men Behave Badly, or Couple Skills. Practise the skills. Practise allowing yourself to have emotions and feelings BUT NOT letting them drive your behaviour.

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Help me with: The problem with self serving advice
littlenick online Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 152 #
An Undisclosed Location | 7 months, 1 week ago (29 minutes after post)

What does your gut tell you?

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Sasha101 offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 7 months, 1 week ago (31 minutes after post)

Take a break for a couple of weeks, if you find you miss each other, then your answer lies there. Another way to tell is, ask yourself am i really happy ? am I happy more times than Im sad ? Staying in a relationship where arguing gets to be the “norm” probably isn’t the best.
way. Take a break, it may freshen things up between you and make you both realize what you truly want.

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Help me with: READ, LEARN AND BE AWARE !
jessgas offline Verified User (7 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 6 months ago (1 month after post)

thank you guys so much, we did stay together btw.
:)

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