friends help: Messed up at a party, haven’t spoken to my good friends in over a year, how do I get them back? - Help.com

Messed up at a party, haven’t spoken to my good friends in over a year, how do I get them back?

This is a pretty harsh story so those faint of heart turn back now. Long story short, it was a party, we had all been away at college and it was awesome seeing one another again, like honestly I love these kids, they were my family back in high school.

Well the problem starts with this. Back in high school I could drink like a fish, people called me Frank the Tank. But at college I couldn’t drink and I guess I lost all my tolerance for it. So at this party I go way overboard and end up acting like a jerk, it was a New Years party and I had to make sure I got my kiss from all the girls, I guess I was more forceful than I intended to be.

But the main problem came later, a little after I had passed out in a bed I heard noises from the floor and realized that one of my drunk female friends was doin the dirty with a new guy I didn’t know. Well I was too wasted to care and just went back to sleep. Well I woke up when the girl got into bed with me saying she was cold, which I didn’t doubt since she was stark naked, the guy was on the floor passed out. Well she was drunk and horny, and so was I. So we went at it, I was not thinking clearly at all, it wasn’t really even a decision, just more like a reaction, had I been the least bit sober I would never have done anything like that with a friend. But I did, and it has changed my life.

Well apparently the guy had woken up at some point and saw us doin it but never said anything. I don’t really remember anything else from that night. All I know is I woke up on a couch and had to get goin cuz I had to meet my family at church that morning. Well the guy ends up telling everyone something along the lines of I had snuck into the room and I dunno, like raped my friend or something. That plus my forceful kissing earlier led to a whole bunch of misunderstanding. Well no one ever brought it up to me for the rest of break and I was sick so I didn’t see anyone until I got back to school, at which point I had the most earth shaking conversation with the only guy that still talks to me somewhat.

So out of embarrassment or shame, or not really remembering exactly what happened that night, I haven’t talked to my friends in over a year. I have great friends from college and everything, but these kids from high school mean everything to me. I think about it absolutley every single day, and it’s killing me.

I know I brought this all upon myself for being an idiot, but now I need help. So if you could, give me a hand, I could really use it.

This open post was written 7 months ago | V/U/S: 230, 1, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post LukeDuffy may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. LukeDuffy is a verified member, has been around for 7 months, 1 week and has 2 posts and 2 replies to their name.

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ericnorri offline Verified User (7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 7 months ago (21 minutes after post)

God new years kisses bring about a lot of grief eh? I was at a party new years and was drunk so I told this girl (who I hadn’t seen since highschool) that I had a girlfriend (I didn’t), and then later tried to kiss her and since then she’s thought I was a total jerk. I know that’s nothing close to the same thing but thats my field of reference I guess.

It’s going to need a lot of work I think. The good news is that you do have a liaison between yourself and your highschool friends, as long as that guy’s on your side you have a shot I think. I dunno, I’ve seen some of my friends get excommunicated from highschool buddies. I’d say have your friend that still talks to you have a little small party, nothing big. And even though it’s going to be the most awkward, want-to-curl-up-in-a-ball-rollover-and-die feeling in the whole world just stop by the party for a little bit. Don’t bring up the incident, chances are they’ve heard the story and will believe what they want to believe. Some of them will be on the borderline and won’t know what to think so you’ve gotta get them to realize you’re still you by just hanging out. If a gigantic “what the f**k is HE doing here!?” Argument arises just stay humble and keep your cool, either people will listen, or somebody will just get belligerent, but as long as it’s not you your chances are much better.

That’s just my 2 cents though and it’s not a sure thing but it might be worth a shot.

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