middle child help: I think my mum is going to take this site away from me, help please? - Help.com

kaitlyn_gagno wrote:
My, dear. The site is exactly what it’s said it’s meant for - help. My advice is this:
Do not argue with yourself in terms of a solution to everything. Become more accepting of what’s given to you, and find peace within the madness. Just have confidence in yourself, and things should eventually become easier for you.

Thanks Kaitlyn, i know i have to be confident but it’s so hard sometimes when you grew up in a place where you were constantly put down and felt kind of shut out and invisible.

Anonymous wrote:
I am not going to lie being the Middle kid sucks!!!! But honestly they notice what you are doing…just be yourself (how old are you?)

Well when your mom gets on I am sure she will not have to be convinced this is a great site because everyone here is here to help other people with problems they may have. Just let her look through the site (maybe even search emotionally subjects like sui*cide, miscarriage, health issues etc…) Just to show here the people her do care

I would say before you come to help.com just go to your mom tell her the problem and take it from there

Thank you for your advice Anon. Your right the middle child really does suck.
Shes kinda closed minded. right now her idea of the site is tat its filled with bad people like pedos and stalkers. I tried to convice her people on here care but maybe because shes never seen it she won’t believe it. I’m just worried she won’t see what i see in the site, and what people on the site see.

I doubt she’d physically ban it. I don’t think she knows how to do that to be honest. It’s either that or she’d just take away my computer and moniter that i don’t go on this site. Which to be honest really sucks.

I wanna reply to all of these so i might have one big long reply haha =)

hrtpain wrote:
let her see this site i dont think this is a bad site and she wont ban.
my dear i can understand how you feel when everyone in this world turn around and walk away from you how you feel but always remember some one is there for you help you always that is god keep faith on him he wont leave you alone.
you can talk to me anytime anything you want im here to talk to you and help you.

Thanks you hrtpain, Thats exactly how i feel. But i guess i’m starting to realize they aren’t walking away they just don’t know i’m calling for them. Thank you for the support, its a great thing knowing i have people to turn to when my parents aren’t always able.

ameliaearthlin wrote:
This site is very well monitored, your mom has nothing to worry about.
I AM THE MIDDLE CHILD!
Yeah its not the best place to be…
You are not the first born, and your not the baby of the family.

Don’t give up with the high grades, get the best u can. They are for your benifit and not your parents after all…

Being he middle child was hard growning up, but I have better people skills than my sisters, am a better problem solver, and can work as a team or by myself.
There are benifits… u just make more use of them later in life.

Thank you for replying amelia. lol yes the middle child does suck! I have so much to look up above me and below me. I’m stuck. and unnoticble in my family.

I don’t think i’m going to give up on high grades. they make me feel better when i’m down. knowing that i have good grades makes me feel like i’m doing something right. I don’t have very good people skills. but i think i’m better at solving problems as well and i can do they whole team or single thing. but i’m sure they can too. my oldest sister isn’t a very good problem solver though. she just likes to scream and yell. thanks again for your reply, nice knowing there are other middle childs who feel the same way.

Neutra wrote:
Not sure if anyone else has said this yet but you could tell her that this is a place you come to, to help others.

Thanks Neutra, i actually kinda forgot to tell her about how i like to be here to help others. i told her that a little bit but she didn’t seem to get what i meant.

okay i’m going to make another reply to do the rest ;) lol.

~Nat~ wrote:
Hi, show her all the wonderful, helpful advice and show her all the great people that are on here to help you. This site is amazing. I don’t know what I would have done without it and honestly, I don’t know what I”d do without it now too. You guys have helped me so much! Show her this page and how many wonderful comments there are to help you. Good luck.

Thanks Nat, I think i’ll for sure show her this post as an example of what it’s like on here. it’ll be alot better than going through every one of my earased posts and trying to find what i said. this post will sum up exactly what i mean. I know this site is amazing! i don’t want to leave it, its been a great help to me and the people on here are great and supportive. thanks for the luck!

owl311 wrote:
A parents concern can often reflect that of stern, wondering out of concern, why they had been left out of the loop, and just so easily adjourned. While thru your eyes, you felt as though you did go to them, to them, such is hidden as if in disguise. Of any of the sites your mouse could have found, for this one is sound and for it’s great help and advice to others, resound. Sometimes when others are listening to us, of which we sometimes don’t feel sure, we reach out to others who’s help and ideas my assist the cure. The most important part off all, is that you did it on a very safe site, of which every message and post may instantly be recall. There are no secrets here that could hide, or mischief that could or be allowed to abide. You have showed strength and maturity, by selected a site that is safe, well moderated, and provides a blanket of security. Never hside anything from your Mom, for if you do, it will only evolve into a ticking time bomb. Explain your concerns and reasons clear, and accept her counsel with loves tears, for you will always have great and wonderful friends here that support you, for of that… you should never have fear.

Thank you Owl =) I think i will show my mum that reply. It’s very true. I feel this site is very safe and it is very well moderated. I don’t think she has anything to worry about and i know i don’t really have anything to hide so i’ll show her this site in hopes she’ll understand. Lol i love how your post got the perfect example of what goes on here. The dreaded filterer lol. But of course it’s a good thing. unless you say something innocent but it runs it anyways. then thats just annoying lol. Thanks for your reply again. I hope my mum reads all these and gets an understanding.

bluflames83 wrote:
hey : )..
I’m a middle kid. I havnet told anyone about this site though… theres nothing wrong with this site, its a good thing.. you could just tell your mom that there are some things that you need to let out but are uncomfortable talking to people you know about it.. and thats perfectly understandable to me, she should be able to understand.. you could say that you like helping people and you sometimes vent on here because you want to release some feelings.. i dont know im trying..

Ooo another middle kid! haha.
Hey, that wasn’t a try you gave very good advice =) You right because i meainly do come on here just to vent and express things i can’t express with her. But she doesn’t understand why i can’t express it with her. Neither can i. I think my next goal in life will be to work on that though. Thank you again for your reply. All that matters to me is that you replied and gave te best answer you could, even if wasn’t you best i still appriciate it haha.I’m easy going lol.

I jusut noticed something.. this post is catigorized under “middle child help” haha i guess being in the middle really does suck so much they need to have a whole catigory for the problem lol xP.

Thank you all again!! really appriciated. Wish me luck on this! lol.

Sans wrote:
Get her to try the site and she may come to like it herself.

Thanks Sans, maybe she would, but my mum doesn’t always seem to like to admit her problems. But who knows right? i’ve seen this site perform bigger miricles.

She hasn’t tested it yet. She’s been really busy tonight. But who knows she may come into my room at anytime and ask to see. We haven’t really talked all night. Kinda hopeing she forgot but then i remember she wouldn’t forget something like that so easily.

Not sure, i’m planning on showing her the main parts of the site and stuff.

I never go on the chat anyways. So there would be no point in showing her.

Yeah. I’m pretty pathetic, i even made a little plan of what i’m going to show her just incase i don’t know lol. I just hate when she can’t see things from my eyes even though i know she’s just trying to help.

Yepp thats my mum lol. I think it’s also that she doesn’t want to see it. I think the whole idea of me feeling depressed and not talking to her but instead relying on strangers freaked her out a bit. I don’t blame her. I’m just not good at talking to my family about my problems.

Yeah maybe, I’ve never felt close to her like the way some of my friends are close to their mothers. This is pretty much the only real thing i’ve hidden from her so right now everything is pretty much out on the open for the most part.
But thank you for your adivce Ikari =) i think i’m going to bed. She’s still awake i believe but if she wants to see the site she knows where to find me lol. thanks again!

bluflames83 wrote:
.. I don’t share lots of stuff with my parents just because it would be an awkward experience and it could mess up how the family functions if they knew EVERYTHING… like when i first came here and they found out im postive they wouldve sent me to a therapist.. so you’re helping your family by not bothering your mom when shes already so busy?? i dont know, that probably wont go over well..

my family is already f**ked up right now. My mumis usually to busy dealing with my angermanagement older sister to deal with me. i have been asleep all tonight so she didn’t look at it. i just want her to look at it with me instead of herself. I don’t know why she hasn’t demanded to see it yet. i think she wants to but is maybe waiting for me first.

ameliaearthlin wrote:
Maybe invite her to when she has a spare moment. As a middle child, we often miss out a bit. Your mom must see your problem as minor and not urgent, which is a good thing.
Moms are not superwomen. Your mom is probably a little stressed.
Make her a cuppa and invite her to have a look with u.
It must be hard having a sis with anger issues, and it must be hard 4 your mom having a daughter like that too. You have something in common at least.
Hope all goes well.
A

I think i’ll remind my mum to check it out tonight. i think i haven’t reminded her because i’m scared of what she’ll think. but with all these replies and ideas i feel more comfortable showing her knowing she may agree.

Sans wrote:
I assume you know how to save links to your desktop. Find some of the best posts you have ever read (in fact I’ll make a post asking for people’s favorite all-time posts), and drag them to your desktop. Then when it’s time to show her the site, instead of whatever random, bored, trollish, i> b>”help me wit mah humwerk wuts 2+2?”, “omg I’m in love with my best friend”, “I’m thirteen, a crack addict and pregnant with quintuplets” /i> /b> posts might be on the help.com home page at the moment, you can show her imaginative, inspiring, thoughtful posts. Plus show her some of your best answers to people who were having problems.

She’ll be so proud that you are participating in such a profound experiment of community. Or at least perhaps she won’t block the site.

I saw the post you made, when i’m done my homework i’m going to make a link of that and check out all the links inside and compose somekind of order to show her. Thanks for all your help. like i said the more help and advice i got on this the more comfortable i feel that she’ll be okay wit it. but i have a feeling once i show her shes going to have to think it over.

Stunna wrote:
explain to her how this site works?! how did it go??

I showed her a while ago. Since then she’s been “thinking” about it.
She has been ignoring me alot lately, it’s like talking to a wall when i have something to say to her =/

Lol, i wish she was could be. But she’s always busy and even when she’s not busy she doesn’t even look in my dirction when i speak to her. The only way i can get get to listen is if i’m crying or something. But i ate to cry infront of people so i wouldn’t do that. I have to be in actual pain for her to care.