girl help: I am still trying to start a relationship with a girl. - Help.com

Just ask her.

just suggest that u grab a cup of coffe sometime

Yep. Seriously. If you are really nervous, make it sound almost like a convenience thing. Like, if you know she is at a particular place for lunch one day, or in the evening, say something about how you’ll be near by and maybe you guys should grab a coffee. That makes it less nervewracking then asking without an excuse like that.

But I think, just go for it and have the guts to say ‘hey, do you want to grab a cup of coffee some time this week? It would be great to catch up properly!’
She’ll be flattered that you want to talk to her, she will hardly say no.

I can be this upfront, even if we’ve never done anything outside of school before?

You can! She will be flattered that you want to meet up with her. Believe me. I LOVE when random people suggest meeting up. It makes me feel great that they genuinely want to and suggested it in the first place. And you’re not even that random, so it’s even better!

so i was thinking of posting something along the lines of “It’s a shame we don’t have any classes together, because now I never see you :( do you want meet up and get coffee sometime?” how’s that sound?

need_advice wrote:
so i was thinking of posting something along the lines of “It’s a shame we don’t have any classes together, because now I never see you :( do you want meet up and get coffee sometime?” how’s that sound?

That sounds good to me!

It shows you enjoy her company and your making the effort to spend time with her but it doesnt sound too needy.

I wish she thought the same way you guys do about this sort of thing… I still haven’t received a response from her, and it’s been several days. She has logged on and done other things on facebook, but hasn’t replied to me. Any thoughts/ideas?

Leave it alone!

You asked once, don’t ask again unless its like a month from now. You’ll seem needy and clingy.

Several days is nothing to be worried about. Maybe she’s busy - and if you push at her when she’s busy she’ll probably just thing “God, I don’t have time for this” and reply with something quite similar.

That’s unusual. She could be genuinely busy. I had a guy two weeks ago who left me a few voicemails asking to meet up. I SO want to meet up with him, I really do. But I never got round to contacting him back. And I feel like a right idiot because I do want to meet up with him. You could leave her another jokey message like ’so, are you trying to avoid me? ;o)’ or ’so you’re too busy to facebook me now? Little miss popular I believe! :o)’

I dunno. Something jokey that she won’t take too seriously, but will rejog her memory that you tried to contact her. Or come up with something yourself. Don’t give up until you know there is no chance. The worst she can say is no.