life help: I’m lost.

This post left anonymously

I’m lost.

Really, really lost.
I’m a horrible person to everyone and everything around me. I get my family’s problems dumped on top of my problems. I have nothing. I don’t even know who I am. I’m ready to give up. This is ******* absurd. No one listens to me, no one cares, especially my family.
I can’t concentrate on anything. I can’t follow through or finish anything I start. I feel creative and in a rut. I feel intelligent alone and retarded around others. I feel crazy all the time.
I can’t get out of this. I’m trapped.
There’s no way to get out.
I’ve got nothing but debt. Medical bills, student loans and no degree. It’s ******* ridiculous. I feel like there’s a tv blaring in my ear all day. I can’t see straight. I want to break everything I see.
I can’t understand anything. I have no clue about this world. I thought I had things somewhat figured out, but realize now that I know nothing about anything. I’m really lost. It’s like I’m in a huge patch of woods and everything looks the same, there’s nothing to help me find my way out.
My ******* parents have set me up for failure by telling me they needed my help around this house so much that I shouldn’t get a job. My dad said, “I don’t want you working right now, I need you to help around the house”. So I have no job, no work history to speak of really, except for a bunch of ignorant retail jobs that add up to less than a year collectively. There aren’t any jobs, anyway, so it’s pointless to think this way. Everything I do is pointless. If I get an idea, it’s already been done. There’s no room for new ideas, it’s all been done before. Every word has been written, everything has been made. I haven’t the capacity to create.
I have the tools. But no drive. No space. Nothing.
My head is so cluttered, I can’t get a thought out.
I have no idea what is going on. I’m pissed off all the time, everything upsets me. I can’t stand things being moved around unless I move them. I don’t like things being out of place. I can’t figure any of this out.
I think I should probably just die because it seems as if there is no one on this planet who can help me make sense of anything.
There’s really no point because I’ve let things get this bad. I’ve dug myself a void and buried my life in it. I think I’m an idiot. I think I’m stupid.
What the **** can I do here? How am I ever going to escape. Yes, a job would be nice, but there aren’t any jobs in this country. If I happened to find an opening somewhere, about 50 to 100 people already have their hands on it and I’m left out. I have nothing to put on a resume that looks nice. I’m an *******. I’m worthless. I’ll never make a difference in anything. I try to imagine what things were like before I was born and it seems so peaceful. If I just didn’t exist things might be a lot better.

This open post was written 10 months ago | V/U/S: 270, 8, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

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Time Traveller 26 #
An Undisclosed Location | 10 months ago (1 minute after post)

Did you post yesterday? You like to do crafts and your parents are clutterholics.

Help me with: How can I make my own website for business with live chat?

crafte 2 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months ago (6 minutes after post)

I think you might be having a tough day/week, but I doubt things are that bad, right?

Help me with: Alrighty then.

Time Traveller 26 #
An Undisclosed Location | 10 months ago (8 minutes after post)

If I were you I would find a way to get out of your parents house this summer. Don’t blow the economy thing out of proportion, a competant person like you can get a job.

Help me with: How can I make my own website for business with live chat?

fumb 0 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months ago (23 minutes after post)

I know exactly how you feel. I get those things from time to time…just feel like a heap of ****.
Don’t try to invent new things in your life, keep up with the Joneses or emulate someone. You have a life, standards and values of your own. Be yourself. All you do is meaningful.
Try to start by helping people, eg volunteering. Even though it might be physically and psychologically hard at first, you will notice your confidence and self-esteem grow.
This will also contribute to your resume by the way!

Anonymous #
10 months ago (1 hour, 13 minutes after post)

I’m not very competent.
If by some stroke of luck I actually found a job, it wouldn’t take long before I couldn’t handle it. I get so easily frustrated.

Time Traveller 26 #
An Undisclosed Location | 10 months ago (1 hour, 19 minutes after post)

My advice for that is make your mind up to handle it and enjoy being independant. I hope that helps.

Help me with: How can I make my own website for business with live chat?

r083rt 0 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months ago (1 hour, 44 minutes after post)

In fact you already have answers to all your questions inside your head, but you’re too confused to hear and use them.

Here’s a little exercise I highly recommend:
1) find a quiet place, highly preferable outside any building, under a tree would be perfect
2) sit on the ground, if possible, or some kind of bench or something
3) set a timer on your mobile or your watch, to about 15-20 minutes
4) now close your eyes
5) imagine all your questions, feelings and thoughts as men and women inside a small room. and you are the owner of the room. Kindly ask them “Please, please, pretty please. I love you all, but I need 15 minutes alone. Please leave the room and return in 15 minutes”. Imagine they leave
6) now breathe deeply, inhale sharply and exhale slowly. Focus completely on air entering and leaving your body. Think of nothing, listen to the world around maybe — just try to get rid of any voices in your head, remember, they all left

Do this for at least 3 next days. Maybe try to do this for 10 minutes, if you find 15-20 too long.

This exercise helped me very much during many tough times, especially in situations of indecision and confusion. The trick is to free the “information channels” inside your brain for answers to come to surface, because otherwise these “channels” are blocked with thoughts, negative self-talk, etc.

Hope this helps…

bvkelse #
An Unknown Location | 10 months ago (8 hours, 11 minutes after post)

how can I. I work two jobs, can’t make my monthly payments. I hate everything. He told me everthing would work out, Ha Ha. Now it’s left up to me. All I ever wanted was children and a happy family. Too late for that. How do I get past that?
Too old, need to make the next half of my life worth something

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I’m lost.

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