Love help: I’m Monica, a 31 year old woman, married for 15 years and still very much in love.

romerojrd197

I’m Monica, a 31 year old woman, married for 15 years and still very much in love.

My husband cheated on me many times when we first got married, I tried to understand why he was doing that to me, I was young, and pretty, and never a nagin wife to him, I tried to find out what he was looking for out there so i could give it to him so he woulnt cheat on me any more, so I started to realise his fantasies of him having girlfriends on the side and me being involved with them too, I noticed he was very happy, and was very nice to me, and since then i never new about him cheating on me anymore, so I was peaceful, and happy, trusting him because he promised me he would never hurt me again, that was 7 years ago, It never ever crossed my mind that he would have the guts to hurt me again after evrything that I have done for him, but he did it, and the worst part is that hes in love with her, Im trying to understand him, but its really hard for me, I forgave him, but my heart, my spirit, my dreams, are torn into pieces. He wanted to go out with his brother, he told me 2 weeks ago, so I said ok (before i found out) He had everything planned to see her that night, he didnt go with his brother he had bought tickets to a dance to take her, and probably had lots of fun with her. Anyway I cant forget Im so hurt I dont believe anything he tells me anymore, I love him so much, But I dont know what to do, He says hes not calling her anymore but i dont know what to believe anymore I feel like dying i cant take it anymore, he really let me down this time, i feel like my life is over someone please help, i really need help

This open post was written 9 months ago | V/U/S: 162, 7, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post romerojrd197 may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. romerojrd197 is a verified member, has been around for 9 months and has 1 posts and 2 replies to their name.

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muhakma 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months ago (7 minutes after post)

I can think of 3 sayings for this. the first. “We may love someone, but that doesn’t mean we are suppose to end up with them.” The next 2 your gonna know if ur fans of madea. “If someone shows you who they are….believe them”. And the last if my favorite. “Ppl in life are like trees. You got your leaves who you can’t trust cause they move with the wind. The branches that will trick you into thinking they gonna stay but when a stronger wind comes they fold under the pressure. But if u can find a root, then your set cause they stick with you for life.” I might have changed the wording a bit, but i hope this helps ya.

Help me with: PLease!

romerojrd197 0 #
An Unknown Location | 9 months ago (24 minutes after post)

Thank you muhakma, you sound like a really wise person, I just wish this pain i have inside of me could at least grow a little smaller, I have 4 kids and i hate being like this around them, but i feel like im breaking, and leaving him makes me think he will never look for me and it scares me been alone, ive known this man since i was 13 years old, I feel like my life will end with out him.

muhakma 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months ago (1 hour, 4 minutes after post)

doesn’t sound like he has the same plans to me.

Help me with: PLease!

theoratica 1 #
An Unknown Location | 9 months ago (1 hour, 12 minutes after post)

I am not qualified to comment on this because first of all I am not married nor have I ever had a relationship longer than six months, barely.. anyways, but to me, based on what you’ve written, it sounds like you have given him way too many slacks. You have let him betray and use you. In my opinion, relationships are active partnerships, and need continuous maintenance over time, and if your husband does not seem to be willing to put the effort into your relationship, long term this may be a headache you don’t want to deal with. I understand you want to be with him, but your kind and forgiving heart seems to be the reason why he allows himself to hurt you. Maybe you should give him a wake up call, threaten to leave, or leave for a short time and see what his reaction is. I know having kids doesn’t make this easy or perhaps possible, but what I am saying is, create a leverage for yourself to control him. I am really sorry to hear about your problem.

Help me with: Can you be friends with your ex-gf?

muhakma invited 3 users to read this post 9 months ago.

Help me with: PLease!

romerojrd197 0 #
An Unknown Location | 9 months ago (1 hour, 41 minutes after post)

What do you mean Muhakma

muhakma 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months ago (10 hours, 20 minutes after post)

If he had thrown away all the chances u have given him. and even though u made his fantasies come true thats he still cheating, he doesn’t sound like the right person in my opinion.

Help me with: PLease!

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Love help: I’m Monica, a 31 year old woman, married for 15 years and still very much in love. - Help.com

I’m Monica, a 31 year old woman, married for 15 years and still very much in love.

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