fun help: Funny jokes.

Zal99

Funny jokes.

well, in case you couldn’t tell from the title, i’m looking for some funny jokes. i’m bored, tired, yet can’t get to sleep, so i need something to help me from falling into the pit of misfortune. I appreciate the help.

This open post was written 5 months ago | V/U/S: 556, 13, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post Zal99 may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. Zal99 is not a verified member, has been around for 5 months and has 12 posts and 51 replies to their name.

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funny, fun, Jokes, laughs, laugh, laughing, random, stupid, cool (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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Zal99 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (2 minutes after post)

Looks like you guys could use a little help getting started. okay, here’s one. What do Micheal Jackson and a garbage bag have in common? They’re both made out of plastic, and hazerdous to your children.

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mikeq10 0 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (3 minutes after post)

Two Irishmen walk out of a pub……

Zal99 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (5 minutes after post)

Here’s another one i have, but idk if you’ll like it. How does Batman’s mother call him for dinner? Dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner Batman!

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Zal99 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (7 minutes after post)

Knock knock. Who’s there? John McCain. John McCain who? exactly.

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mikeq10 0 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (8 minutes after post)

George Washington Was at a party and had been drinking heavily. A lady approached him and declared ” George Washington you are drunk “
Yes Madam you are right and you are Ugly and in the morning i`ll be sober ………….

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mikeq10 0 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (12 minutes after post)

Anonymous wrote:
A dentist, an electrician, and a carpenter decide to play a practical joke their best friend on his wedding night.

“I’ll loosen some joints on his bed so it collapses when he’s making love,” says the carpenter.

“I’ll hot wire his mattress so they’ll feel immense heat while making love,” says the electrician.

“Those are good ideas,” says the dentist. “But my contribution’s going to be a real surprise.”

The next day the new husband comes to the diner to meet his friends. He says “I congratulate you guys for making the bed heat up and collapse, but I’m gonna kill whichever one of you put novocaine in the massage oil!”

Good one !!!!

Ravi 0 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (23 minutes after post)

ENGLISH SKILLS…BEWARE!

This is a true story from the Japanese Embassy in US!!!

A few days ago, Prime Minister Mori was given some Basic English conversation training before he visits Washington and meets president Barack Obama…

The instructor told Mori Prime Minister, when you shake hand with President Obama, please say ‘how r u’.
Then Mr. Obama should say, ‘I am fine, and you?’ Now, you should say ‘me too’. Afterwards we, translators, will do the work for you.’

It looks quite simple, but the truth is…

When Mori met Obama , he mistakenly said ‘who r u?’ (Instead of ‘How r u?’.)

Mr. Obama was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor:
‘Well, I’m Michelle’s husband, ha-ha…’

Then Mori replied ‘me too, ha-ha.. .’.

Then there was a long silence in the meeting room.

Help me with: Coming Friday we have cubical decoration competition in our office.

Zal99 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (30 minutes after post)

Ravi wrote:
ENGLISH SKILLS…BEWARE!

This is a true story from the Japanese Embassy in US!!!

A few days ago, Prime Minister Mori was given some Basic English conversation training before he visits Washington and meets president Barack Obama…

The instructor told Mori Prime Minister, when you shake hand with President Obama, please say ‘how r u’.
Then Mr. Obama should say, ‘I am fine, and you?’ Now, you should say ‘me too’. Afterwards we, translators, will do the work for you.’

It looks quite simple, but the truth is…

When Mori met Obama , he mistakenly said ‘who r u?’ (Instead of ‘How r u?’.)

Mr. Obama was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor:
‘Well, I’m Michelle’s husband, ha-ha…’

Then Mori replied ‘me too, ha-ha.. .’.

Then there was a long silence in the meeting room.

rofl. wow, you really brightened my gloomy and dull day. thanks. thanks to everyone who commented on this post!

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Ravi 0 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (33 minutes after post)

http://www.funtoosh.com/ here you ‘ll get funny visual jokes

Help me with: Coming Friday we have cubical decoration competition in our office.

Zal99 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months ago (49 minutes after post)

okay, so a guy walks into a bar. now he’s this big, burly guy, but not the best dressed guy. the bouncer pulls him aside. the bouncer says “hey pal, to get in here, you gotta have a jacket and a tie,” so, the guy goes outside to his car. he shuffles around for a few minutes, then comes back in with a jacket on. the bouncer looks at him and says “good, i see you have a jacket, but you still need a tie.” So the guy goes back out to his car, shuffles around for a few minutes, and gets this set of jumper cables. he fastens them into a tie, and puts it on. He comes back into the bar, and the bouncer just looks at him. The bouncer says “well, that’s technically a tie. tell you what, i’m gonna let you in. just don’t try and START anything.”

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Funny jokes.

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