stress help: Stress…HELP - Help.com

You need to speak with a therapist. Getting it out by speaking to an impartial listener will be a huge weight off your chest. A therapist will also help you to see that your issues are not so big that they can’t be solved. They will give you great advice on how to solve the overwhelming issues in your life, and offer new ideas about how to handle the normal day to day stressors.

Going to see a Therapist is not an option for me.

May I ask why?

It’s a personal thing with my family. We could afford it.. but my Mom would think I was being dramatic, and not take me.

Finding a confidant who’ll just listen really helps. You can talk to me if you want.

The level of stress you are expressing, with it’s accompanying physical symptomology really requires therapy. I would urge you to at least seek out a school counselor, who agrees not to share info with your mom.
Meanwhile, running is a great outlet for stress…any physical activity increases the output of endorphins (feel good, stress relieving chemicals) in the brain. Stress and anxiety are often a symptom of an underlying depression..exercise will help both; and running especially helps those who are depressed. You can also combine exercise with the all natural supplement Valerian (can purchase at any health food store) when you are feeling especially anxious. Valerian is great for anxiety…if you do not feel any relief from Valerian, or you find it makes you more depressed or anxious, discontinue use.If you ever feel suicidal, it is very important that you seek help! You sound intelligent and mature enough to realize that.

What are you stressed out about?

Alot of things. I can’t talk to a counselor, because my mom is a counselor.

While therapists and counselors can be helpful, I don’t think they’re for everyone. I know mine made me feel like my situation was even worse than I had imagined. When my ex and I were still going out we got into a huge fight on the phone over nothing and it ended with him telling me he wasn’t sure if he loved me anymore. It was so unexpectedly sudden and traumatic that I said goodbye, ended the call and threw up. I lapsed into a depression, a response I never expected from myself in this kind of situation. I threw up for nights, couldn’t eat, and didn’t sleep. I literally stayed awake for days. It reached a point where I had to start taking sleeping pills. The pills would throw me into an hour of hallucination and extreme panic and anxiety before putting me to sleep. I started talking to a friend who was basically going through the same emotional limbo I was and we just understood each other. We were able to talk and listen without judgment and for those brief moments in my day, I’d be able to feel normal again. Long story short, I’m much, much better now. Tell me what’s on your mind, my dear.

Well, there really are a lot of things. One, earlier in the year, I had lots of fights with one of my friends. We’re okay now, but her dad still thinks I’m the same as I was. I’m not. I’m only rising into 7th grade; I’m a lot younger than most people here. In 6th grade, my grades started dropping, and one of my teachers even had to ask me if everything was all right. In the few years, my friend since first grade started drifting away from me, and closer to my other best friend. Then, 6th grade, that friend became friends with the girl I fought with, and their best friends now, and I feel left out. On a school day in the park, there was this huge thing about it, and she was all like “ooh, I noticed to. I actually kind of like you better.” Later the girl I fought with was sitting in her lap. I just feel like I’m losing all my friends to other friends. One friend in the school year hardly talks to me now because she so occupied with the computer. There’s one person I talk to a lot, but I’m not sure if she really likes talking to me as much as I do her. I feel like the girl I fought with (Let’s just call her A) is trying to steal all of my friends away from me. Another thing that bothers me, is the fact that I’ve only been asked out once, and it was by a fifth grader when I was in 6th grade. I’m very short, and I have a weird personality, but that sometimes makes me feel like I’m not worth liking, and only my friends and family really like me. It’s a stupid thing to get upset about, and I always feel like this is something every teenage girl goes through, and that’s why I never wanted to tell anyone. And on the friend thing, My mom got really mad at me for fighting, so I can’t talk to her, because she’s always like “Well, I don’t want you to fight anymore.” And I won’t dare tell anyone about the boyfriend thing. On that, I would just like to have someone that I know loves me, and just be in a happy relationship. This is all probably pretty sad stuff to get upset about, but that’s what stresses me out.

I also find it frustrating, that if ANYTHING happens at school, it’s reported to my Mom immediately, and I get in trouble for that. The friend I fought with told her parents every time it happened, and I looked like a jerk to them. I can’t talk to my parents about friends anymore, because they think any fight is my fault.

Junior high school kids can be very cruel. When I was in sixth grade, I introduced a friend of mine to my best friend and they ended up becoming really close friends. They ended up pushing me away and for whatever reason, started hating me. Then one of my other friends, that same year, started an “I hate (my name)” club. Then a couple of girls decided to crash my birthday party. They brought rocks and were prepared to fight me. My luck, huh? I can promise you one thing, things will get better. Don’t stress about being stressed, that’s counterproductive. Sometimes you just need to let yourself feel what you need to feel. Let it out. Use this time to learn to love yourself. Don’t ever think that you’re not WORTH liking. My dear, you said you think have a weird personality? I salute you. Weird is in ;). Normal is overrated. I prefer being eccentric. Embrace it. When you learn to appreciate yourself just as you are, you’ll start to attract the right friends, the kind of people who are loyal and loving. Unfaithful friends are NOT worth jeopardizing your grades and education over. And about relationships, “You cant hurry love. No, you just have to wait. You got to trust, give it time. No matter how long it takes.” You have a friend in me, my dear. Anytime you need to talk about anything, I’m here.

Thank you. That really is helpful, and I do feel a bit better now :3