relationship help: Contact with ex’s family? - Help.com

partlythere
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Contact with ex’s family?

broke up with long term (5 years) boyfriend 3 months ago and his mum and i are planning to catch up in a couple of days. i didn’t think this was too weird but then my mum said to me today that it’s really not a good idea.

she’s not the type to intrude and we’d hve other stuff to talk about besides the breakup. but is it weird, especially given that I dumped HIM?

what do you guys think i should do?

This open post was written 4 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 269, 16, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post partlythere has helped in 1 other user's post within the last 4 days. partlythere is a verified member, has been around for 11 months, 1 week and has 72 posts and 426 replies to their name.

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (9 minutes after post)

Do you and your ex have children together?

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (14 minutes after post)

no it was just a casual relationship (began at age 18) but i hung out with his family heaps.

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (17 minutes after post)

then it’s not a good idea. I would let sleeping dogs lie and move on. It’s not a good idea to open old wounds on people whom you hurt. It’s not a good idea.

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (20 minutes after post)

hmmm yes i know, but the thing is she suggested it, and also i didnt really hurt him, because we only broke up because we were planning to move in together and then he freaked out and said he didn’t want to do it.

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (22 minutes after post)

Are you still hoping to get back with him and him with you?

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (23 minutes after post)

no that’s not going to happen. besides he’s away.

i’ve recently been on holiday and she said she was interested to see all the photos and stuff, and catch up with me

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (26 minutes after post)

Well, it is still not a good idea. Unless you hope to rekindle that romance. Which you say it’s not going to happen.

Let it go. Make it part of your past and maybe a time that you enjoyed.

You need to move on.

If you keep on wanting to relive those days and reminisce about the time you and your boyfriend were an item, his mom is the best instrument to make you do it.

Now, I’m thinking she’s the one who wants to bring you back together again and hopes for a reconciliation.

I would be polite with a firm “thanks, but no thanks.”

let it go.

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (28 minutes after post)

****, i’ve already made an arrangement, it looks weird to cancel now

perhaps catching up with her is a goodbye thing?

i mean surely she’d know she couldnt bring us back together.

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (33 minutes after post)

Just go then. But the next time she invites you, make yourself unavailable. It looks weirder if you keep in touch with her and keep on accepting her invitations to get together.

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (34 minutes after post)

hmm yes good idea. something tells me this is just a one off thing anyway. i just hope she’s not mad at me for dumping her son :S

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pheeebsste offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (35 minutes after post)

be careful that shes not trying to get you and her son back together. if she likes you enough to see you after you dumped him, chances are, she wants you guys together.

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (35 minutes after post)

If she’s mad, she’ll get over it.

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littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 159 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (37 minutes after post)

pheeebsste wrote:
be careful that shes not trying to get you and her son back together. if she likes you enough to see you after you dumped him, chances are, she wants you guys together.

My thoughts exactly but partlyhere says that’s not gonna happen.

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (42 minutes after post)

hmmm maybe she does but as i said she’s not nosy and she’ll mind her own business. i think she understands why i broke up with him. she’s a young mother and not overly motherly if you know what i mean. so yeah, i dunno. ohwell i’ll just go and see waht happens

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firstmom7270 offline Verified User (3 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 months, 3 weeks ago (2 weeks, 2 days after post)

how did it go?
To help out a little late. If I was close to his family I would have done it no if ands or buts about it.

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partlythere offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 3 months, 3 weeks ago (2 weeks, 3 days after post)

it went ok! was nice to see her. didn’t talk about him. i was really glad to have seen her one last time.

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