Why do the people you need most turn on you when you need them the most? - Help.com

see, there are many resons for this.
1. they are not your real friends
2. they are scared that they cant do anything
3. they have their own probs and think they are more important.
4. they are trying to help but dont know how
5. they think you need space
6. they dont understand

but whats up?

I’ll tell you why my friend, because there are givers and takers in this world. And there are a hell of a lot more takers, and when two givers meet eachother by the end of it one becames the taker. Its the ****** way things are.

jjlove wrote:

Snar wrote:
I’ll tell you why my friend, because there are givers and takers in this world. And there are a hell of a lot more takers, and when two givers meet eachother by the end of it one becames the taker. Its the ****** way things are.

Hey Snar, can you loan me some money? LOL

Sure, and you throw me a couple of those real friends that seem strangely akin to leprauchans these days :P

Snar wrote:
I’ll tell you why my friend, because there are givers and takers in this world. And there are a hell of a lot more takers, and when two givers meet eachother by the end of it one becames the taker. Its the ****** way things are.

I couldnt of put it in a better way!

I think sometimes it is just the card you are dealt.

It is hard when you are going though something and when you look towards someone for help they have their own things going on and too busy to notice the help you need.

Maybe try to rely on yourself more and then one someone does offer you help when you need it you will have a nice surprise rather than expecting it the second you need it.

I do know what you mean though, I have had rough times when I needed someone there for me and each time the same person would be wrapped up in their own stuff to even notice, I told them that what they did annoyed and hurt me and things seemed to get back on track but they have just done it again, going through a rough patch, told them I was going for an appointment and that it was scarey, when I got back from the appointment they were no where to be seen at all!

The appointment was on Monday and this person has not spoken to me since before the appointment, so basically I had to deal with it on my own, I am kind of ok now but I have decided to lose this so called friend.

Friends are there for you no matter what and it is equally important to forgive but you should not feel like you have to forgive each and everytime.

Talk to these people that are letting you down, maybe they don’t know the whole deal, give them a chance to be there and if they fail then move on.

Thanks jj :)
Yeah I have family, all being great :D

Yeah, family are important and mine are surprisingly there for me at the moment :P
Just nice to have friends around you as well as you seem to be able to lean on them a little more than family, friends are not bias or over emotional when you want to dump emotional baggage yet family tend to get upset alot more.
But hey as you say, atleast I have them :)

Yeah I suppose, when I look back it does seem to be more of a friendship based on the other person not wanting to be alone more than wanting my friendship.
When other people crop up from time to time in their life I don’t really hear off them and then when they have nothing better to do they all of a sudden want me around again.
So not a real friendship…?

alphabuilder wrote:
Wow thx all for the replies, problem is im still confused, you see its not my friends, its my wife. Im feeling really off, somtimes I dont want to get out of bed during the day, or i miss consecutive meals, I just feel so ******.

Ahh I see..

I think the issue there may be that she doesn’t understand how you are feeling and what you need or expect from her.
If you tell her how bad you feel and you would like her support then I am sure she will try to understand what you are dealing with.