Move on or move forward?
One of my best friends asked me on a date, but took it back because he thought we were too good of friends and he’s afraid of where a date would lead because he doesn’t see himself “kissing let along anything else”.
… (and yes, I did make a pro-con list…)
Pro:
1- If we moved forward, we’re great friends and we’d make a good couple.
2- I am very attracted to him, and I think he is still attracted to me.
3- We have an obvious cute-couple chemistry… Everyone from our own parents to strangers on the street comment on it. Many saying that we’ll get married someday.
4- Our friendship is sort-of doomed either way in 3 years… when he moves across the country for graduate school.
5- He’s everything I ever wanted, and some I didn’t believe actually existed. I do love him. I am attracted to him. I fear loosing him. Everything seems to be there. I could see myself spending the rest of my life with him.
6- He is noticeably attracted to me, and clearly attached.
Con:
1- Both of us are awkward as hell, 19 years old and 100% inexperienced. (I’m the first girl he’s asked out).
2- This level of closeness in a friendship is VERY important to both of us, and neither of us have found it with anyone else. (different reasons- but both equally important). By dating we risk loosing that.
3- He said he wanted to stay friends, I don’t want to push it if he really meant that.
4- I’m not sure how much our attraction is “hey look, they’re interested in me. Oh, I’m interested back.” and “I have a good relationship with them.” Rather than “I am in love with this person.”
5- Perhaps we’re stuck in the friend zone- and any attempts to make it out will ruin it.
6- His backing out, and avoiding, and not calling me- is not a sign of how I want a future relationship to be.
7- I don’t think he has thought this through nearly as much as I have- I’m nervous that if we do move forward I’ll be more attached than he will.
What do you think? Should I help this relationship forward? (I would need to if it ever went anywhere) Or should I just let us be friends, and the dating relationship elsewhere?
This open post was written 4 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 210, 2, 1 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post
Reciprocity (0)
Since writing this post C. S. may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. C. S. is a verified member, has been around for 6 months and has 56 posts and 360 replies to their name.
Invite Others to Help
A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.
