friends help: Am I doing the right thing? - Help.com



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Am I doing the right thing?

Friend A and friend B are having a joint birthday next week.
Friend A was planning a big birthday in August with a bunch of people I dislike and knew I wouldn’t show up. But seeing how this is the last time friend B was going to be in the country, she want’s a joint party. Friend B birthday is actually in December.
So their joint party was going to be small but now friend A is adding all her friends, even the ones I hate. I didn’t know this was happening until friend B told me.
I easily get pissed off when lied to. And feeling hurt that they don’t care that I’ll be miserable for they are the type who ignores such things.
I said I’ll go to make them happy, but I decided on the day I’ll ditch and say I was sick.
For I am going to the same country as friend B to spend her birthday there.

I know I should probably suck up my anger and go. But I’m at the point of questioning if my friends actually care about me or not. Like ffs I just had my puppy put down and no one is there to comfort me.

This open post was written 4 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 131, 1, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

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infinity offline Verified User (10 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 2 weeks ago (5 days, 19 hours after post)

While your friends care about you or not is a valid question, you also need to think whether you care about your friends or not. You hate some people and even though, “hate” is not a very good feeling, you have the right to hate someone you don’t like. But is that “hate” so great that you can not attend the birthday party of your friends you like? Do you think it is fair to your friends that hate for some people overpowers your friendship with A and B? Don’t you think it should be the other way round? Shouldn’t your friendship for A and B overpower the hate that you harbor for some people?

Also, try to understand that even though you hate them, they do not. They can’t change the way they live because you hate some people. Try to put yourself in your friends’ shoes. Let us say, a friend of yours hate some people and you are throwing a birthday party. You need to invite those people who your friend hates because you have good social contacts with them and it would be impolite not to invite them. You know your friend wouldn’t like it but then you need to invite your friend too. Do you now understand why your friends behave the way they do?

I have only asked you some questions. I hope they will help you to decide what you should do.

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Help me with: I am not well emotionally.

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