crush help: Do you think race is the issue? - Help.com

Do you think race is the issue?

I would really like your help, sorry about it being so long. Okay so there’s this guy who I had 2 classes with last year,we never really spoke to eachother, he was just another classmate.In late April of 2008, I would notice that he would stare at me all the time and I used to wonder why he would do it. so I eventually started liking him because I was noticing him from the staring. so in late May, I told him on Msn that I liked him and at first he didn’t take me seriously then he said that he didn’t want to waste my time because he had a g/f.

But even after he told me that, he would still stare at me, whenever I would walk past him, he doesn’t look at me until I turn around to look at him then I see him looking back at me at the same time. so this has been going on for like a year with the whole staring thing..except it would be in the hallways because we didn’t have any classes together this year. One night I was talking to one of my guy friends on msn and prom came up, so he asked me who I wanted to take as my prom date and I told him the name of my crush but then I said that I can’t go with him because he has a g/f, then my guy friend put a confused face and said that he doesn’t have a girlfriend because they know eachother. I’ve asked around before and everyone told me that he doesn’t have a g.f so I figured that he lied to me about that.so my prom was on June 5th and I told my myself that I should dance with him since I won’t see him again because he’s going off to Uni, but I changed my mind because I was too scared. so anyways I noticed that for the whole night; he kept on staring at me, even when I was on the dance floor, I would look around in the crowd to find him staring at me.

so I was starting to think that maybe he wanted to dance with me. so I took a break from dancing, went to get a drink from the bar and went back on the dance floor. I wasn’t really dancing because I didn’t like the song they were playing so I was just slowing rocking, then I noticed that I was standing near him so I felt kind of awkward. so I’m standing there then I noticed that he kept coming closer and closer to me slowly. we were so close to eachother that his arm was up against mine then suddenly, I felt him grab me by the waist and started dancing with me so I was shocked at first then I started dancing with him. while we were dancing; he kept rubbing my arms up and down, he took my hand and folded his hand into mine. Then the Dj started playing a slow song and we parted from eachother for a little while then we were both looking around in the crowd then he finally locked eyes with me and asked me if I wanted to dance? so I smiled and nodded yes. While we were slow dancing; he kept rubbing my back up and down slowly, and then he ran his hand over my butt a couple of times and I had my face pressed up on his chest. Then when a fast song came on, we smiled at eachother and started dancing again. we danced together to 6 songs. Then we went our separate ways.

so 2 days later, my friend told me that she spoke to him on Facebook and she sent me the Convo. I was brought up into the convo and my friend said that me and him looked hot together while we were dancing then he said: ahaha, I don’t want to give the wrong intentions btw, she’s a cool person but yea..then later on in the convo, he said he just wanted to have fun. so I was crushed by that. I mean I understood when he said he wanted to have fun but what was the whole clasping hands thing all about? I seriously thought he liked me that way because I was the only girl he danced with for the whole night, I thought he was thinking the same thing that he wanted to dance with me since we won’t be seeing eachother again. so I sent him a msg on msn later that night saying: hey, I saw the convo with you and my friend I just wanted to say that you weren’t giving me the wrong intentions and I don’t mean to be rude, I had fun and I danced with other guys and you weren’t the one who made my night. I only said that because I didn’t want to seem desperate and of course he made my night but I couldn’t let him know that. so then he replied back saying: kool, I only said that because your friend kept saying that we looked so hot together dancing, I hope I didn’t say anything to make you mad. so I said: no I’m not mad so then I was feeling really bad for what I said so I went to school the next day and I went up to him and said: hey, can I talk to you for a minute? then he said: sure so I said: okay, I don’t mean to sound annoying but about that msg I sent you on msn about prom, I didn’t mean to say it like that. then he said smiling: it’s okay, it’s okay, who cares. then I said: no, I only said that because I didn’t want to look desperate. but I didn’t mean it. then he said: it’s okay. then I said(blushing): I know this might not matter to you,(then I put my hands to my face and said omg) then he smiled and said: this must be hard for you to say then I laughed and said: I’m gonna be honest with you, but you were the one that made my night then he was smiling for the whole time then I said: I know you don’t like me like that but I just wanted to be honest so yea…then he kept smiling then he said: ok well thanx…have a nice day, then I said: okay, thanx you too. so people told me that he doesn’t like me like that, he does like me but is afraid of what other people might think, or he does like me but isn’t ready for a relationship.

I was wondering if it had anything to do with the race thing, because he’s Indian and I’m black, and I heard that Indians cannot date outside of their race. I’m so sorry if this is long, just wanted to give you guys some background info. Thank-you

This open post was written 4 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 137, 3, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

crush, mixed signals, Prom (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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