Relationships help: Hi guys, - Help.com

krismariedore
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Hi guys,

I’ve never posted here before, but I could really use some help. I’ve been in a relationship with this guy for a few years. And I feel like he’s my best friend, but I’m not in love with him anymore. But he is, and I’m not exaggerating, madly in love with me. And I’m so comfortable with him. So I’ve stayed with him.
But he annoys me so much now, and I know this arrangement isn’t fair to him at all. But I’m terrified to leave him, because what if this guy is it, the one guy who’s ever going to love me?
I feel like I’ve been married for 50 years to this one person, that I’m stuck in the relationship I don’t want to be in, because no one else wants me.
Any advice would be great!

This open post was written 4 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 75, 1, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post krismariedore may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. krismariedore is a verified member, has been around for 4 months, 2 weeks and has 1 posts and 2 replies to their name.

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Relationships, dating, Stuck (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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Anonymous #
4 months, 2 weeks ago (12 minutes after post)

there is a thing which makes it SSSOOOO much easier for everyone which is discuss it with him!!!

dont struggle to make a decision and give him no choice in the matter.

tell him, say something like ‘look i’m worried this is where i find myself. i dont know what to do i am so sorry, you are so cool, you deserve better , i RRREEEAAALLLYYY wish i we’re in love with you but i dont think i am, and i got no idea whether i am supposed to split up with you or give it time or what is fair or what is the right thing to do so i want to tell you so we can try and work it out together’ - that’s introducing him to the idea and giving him choice which is always so much easier for people to handle than rejection.

but you know he will know if you are just pretending - you do need to make it a real joint decision and not pretend when really you have already made up your mind

good luck

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