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I would like to tell my story in hopes that someone will read it and give me some advice.
My husband is in the Army, we have been married for 4 months. He is a good man, we have had a wonderful relationship up until a month or so ago. We lived together for about a year before we married, we had already bought a house and he surprised me with a proposal which I happily accepted. He went on a 7 week deployment 2 weeks after our wedding, everything was fine during that trip we were able to talk on the phone and chat on the computer. He came home for 2 weeks and then left again to a training course in another country that is supposed to last 7 weeks. For the first couple of weeks everything was fine, he was very busy with long demanding hours and going out with the guys in the evenings. Our communication started dwindling and then stopped completely. I tried not to badger him with calls/emails but I was very concerned, finally last Monday I got an email from him telling me that he thinks I should leave him, he is not happy and he thought marriage was the right thing but it’s not. He said that he is wondering if we rushed into this at the wrong times and reasons. He also said that he doesn’t see it working because he feels that if we keep trying he will only end up leaving later after we make bigger life decisions (i.e. children). I will tell you that we are both previously divorced, his was final 1 month before we met and mine 6 months before we met. He said that it’s not the trip that he’s on and he made this decision based on a “broad range of things” that he had been thinking about. I am completely shocked confused and scared. I love my husband with all of my heart, anyone that knows us will be totally shocked because we have been very happy together. He is coming back this weekend, I am not sure how to act or what I need to do. I don’t know if the stress of military being gone so much and knowing it will continue (he is due to leave again in September) has got him thinking we can’t make it but I know that we can. I am committed to this marriage, I refuse to walk away from the lifelong commitment that I made to him. I have been through a divorce before and so has he so I don’t see why he would be so quick to do it again without trying to make this work. Both of our parents are divorced and I know that he has never had a good role model of a marriage that has lasted to see that sometimes you go through things but you work it out together instead of walking away. I truly want our marriage to stay together, I just hope anyone can help me in dealing with this. I know that he loves me and I love him. Thank you in advance for any advice.
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