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Relationship(s) advice + job loss
My life-partner and I agreed to have an open relationship, with very few boundaries. This turned out to be a bad idea (from my perspective) as now we both have other partners who we love, which would be ok if we still spent enough time together but we don’t. Part of this is caused by him having to work lots of overtime in a small company to keep the company afloat, whilst spending any remaining time working on a voluntary project that could have business value in the next year or two which would rescue him from his problematic position in his job. His other partner works with him on this project. I, and my other partner, are in post-graduate study for at least 2.5 further years. We all live in a small town with few job opportunities at the best of times, much worse now. His partner is moving to a bigger town to work as she has just graduated. The idea was that he would stay in my town until I finished study. We lived together until recently as I felt I needed some space I wasn’t sharing with his other partner, somewhere I could be alone.
Feelings-wise, I want to help him out of his situation but I don’t know how. Our relationship has deteriorated to the point where I was about to leave him, and last night he tells me the full story behind his behaviour and I no longer know what to do. My other partner has been very supportive and tolerant of the situation despite not finding the setup optimum. He would prefer it to be just us but is enjoying what we have regardless. I feel guilty because having moved out has doubled my life-partner’s outgoings (mine too, but I have a much more secure income, though it is lower). If he loses his job he will probably have to move, maybe to a different town to find work. If he leaves town I see no reconciliation possible.
How can I help him? How can I fix our relationship? Should I bother?
PS: If you are about to tell me that open relationships are always wrong no matter what, I would appreciate the lack of your comment.
This open post was written 4 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 127, 9, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post
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