Relationships help: I just broke up with my girlfriend of 9 months and I don’t know whether I did the right thing or not.

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I just broke up with my girlfriend of 9 months and I don’t know whether I did the right thing or not.

I’m 20 shes 18. I did this because I don’t have any strong feelings for her, but I do really care for her. She kinda feels more like my little sister in that, I don’t want anything bad to happen to her and I want her to be happy. She has told me she loved me before, but I couldn’t say it back to her. I feel like after this amount of time I should at least have a strong emotion towards her, but I honestly don’t. She was crying as I told her I wanted to go on a break, and I almost started crying as well. I feel horrible about making her so sad, but I just want to know if I’ve done the right thing. Its only been 2 hours since I broke up with her and I’m already scared that I’ve made a mistake.

This open post was written 4 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 552, 14, 3 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

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becc 149 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (4 minutes after post)

my bf did this to me. a day after we broke up he figured out he loved me. maybe if ur feeling like this u do love her. u just needed to not be with her to realize how much she means to u

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Dr. Ralph 70 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (5 minutes after post)

You made a mistake by pretending to love her if you didn’t… or not being able to say it if you did. There was a mistake somewhere, of that part I’m sure.

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MHYH 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (6 minutes after post)

yeah it just felt like I was trying to learn to love her, or teach myself to lover her. But it never quite happened…

Brianimal 0 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (7 minutes after post)

Well It would only hurt her more if your love was a lie. Hopefully you can be friends and having a best friend is better than a boy friend any day!

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linuxya 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (7 minutes after post)

The only way to know the girl for you is to have some experience. Then you can compare. You learn who is compatible and who isn’t.

Personally, I’m really turned on by my girlfriend. I love looking at her and touching her and I can’t keep my hands off her. I often feel like I’d do anything for her. She surprises me pleasantly all the time with her sense of humour which I find very sexy. We’ve been an item for a year.

I’d say you deserve those feelings. Go out and live. There is no “the one” for you. There are 3 billion women out there.

Help me with: The problem with self serving advice

MHYH 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (7 minutes after post)

But I’m scared I’m trying to convince myself all of this. I don’t know I’m just scared I made a mistake…

Anonymous #
4 months, 1 week ago (12 minutes after post)

If you did make a mistake, you would have never know if you didnt break up, and you would contiue to wonder.. if she really really loves you and if you find out you love her then chances are, with a lot of apologies you may be able to get her back. Try other girls and you will feel what you feel..

MHYH 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (15 minutes after post)

linuxya thank you so much for that post… I didn’t have those feelings for her like you do with your girlfriend, and I feel like I should for someone I could truly love.

linuxya 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (20 minutes after post)

There are no right or wrong decisions. There are just consequences and lessons learned. Don’t beat yourself up. You made your decision. Now take some time to rebuild yourself into a new man and get out and socialize as much as possible. Develop your confidence and you’ll find new women interested in you.

Help me with: The problem with self serving advice

MHYH 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (27 minutes after post)

im so glad you were on today…thank you

linuxya 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (29 minutes after post)

Just don’t fall into the trap of comparing other girls with this one. The one that you walked away from or that got away is always a danger for turning into a fantasy of perfection that never really existed.

I wish you the best of luck!

Help me with: The problem with self serving advice

MHYH 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (30 minutes after post)

advice taken. thank you too and I hope you and your girl stay happy together! :D

linuxya 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (32 minutes after post)

Here’s something else that might make you feel better. Prior to my girlfriend I was dating someone else. She ended it with me because she didn’t have the romantic feeling. Well to be honest I didn’t really have it with her either although we obviously liked each other. She did me a huge favour although I think she was a little put out that I hooked up with my girlfriend about two weeks later.

Anyhow, you probably did the right thing for BOTH of you.

Help me with: The problem with self serving advice

chicken_nuggett82 #
An Unknown Location | 4 months, 1 week ago (1 day, 15 hours after post)

Jeez, that’s a toughy. If I were her, I would WANT to hear that you care for me the way you say you do for her.

1. You didn’t make a mistake. If you would have stayed with her to spare her feelings THAT would hurt much worse than being honest.

2. Don’t ever tell yourself you should be having feelings you’re not, becasue when it comes down to what’s in your heart there is no right or wrong, no “normal.”

3. If she is being bitter towards you, it’s only because she feels hurt. Go to her and tell her how much you care for her, that she is the last person you’d ever want to see hurt and the love you have for her is even deeper than hers for you because is a platonic kind of love. It’s not going to fade and you want her to stay in your life even if that means giving her space for a while to heal.

Good luck! you sound like a sweetie, now work ittt:)

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Relationships help: I just broke up with my girlfriend of 9 months and I don’t know whether I did the right thing or not. - Help.com

I just broke up with my girlfriend of 9 months and I don’t know whether I did the right thing or not.

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