dating help: so im really having some women trouble right now and its really bringing me down…. - Help.com

Quit wearing your heart on your sleeve.

That usually means don’t let on as to what you’r thinking about a girl or let them know how you feel right away. If people sense the vibes that you give out, they get turned off before you even get to know them. Don’t let on too soon.

Sometimes girls can be really dumb, and are too quick to judge. Like you said before, you have some confidence issues, right? I think that confidence is a really important trait. The reason why the “nice girl picks the a-hole syndrome” is most likely bc the a-hole is super confident. Confidence in any form is very attractive, and draws people in.
But then again, you seem like a genuine guy. If you’re really interested in a girl, let her know. Spend time together. When the time is right you’ll run into that perfect someone and things will just click. Maybe your just in standby mode right now?

it mean ur over sensitive but if i found a guy like u id seriously like chain u in my basement so no other girl can find u haha

Gee… I can’t exactly answer that. I’m a nice guy and it works out just fine for me.

It sounds to me like you expect too much from women too fast. What happens when you ask them out?

Also, you seem to be complimenting yourself an awful lot. You could have just said, “I’m smart, attractive and nice enough” and left it at that. Instead you said:
“ive been told im a pretty attractive guy”
“if im having a good day i can be real relaxing and have some good conversations”
“ive been told by friends that im pretty smart”
“ive been told im a nice sweet guy”

which - even in this tiny little post - ends up making you sound stuck up. all this “i’ve been told stuff” might aim to sound modest, but it doesn’t. this isn’t nearly enough to go on, but it could be a massive turn off.

Anonymous wrote:
Gee… I can’t exactly answer that. I’m a nice guy and it works out just fine for me.

It sounds to me like you expect too much from women too fast. What happens when you ask them out?

Also, you seem to be complimenting yourself an awful lot. You could have just said, “I’m smart, attractive and nice enough” and left it at that. Instead you said:
“ive been told im a pretty attractive guy”
“if im having a good day i can be real relaxing and have some good conversations”
“ive been told by friends that im pretty smart”
“ive been told im a nice sweet guy”

which - even in this tiny little post - ends up making you sound stuck up. all this “i’ve been told stuff” might aim to sound modest, but it doesn’t. this isn’t nearly enough to go on, but it could be a massive turn off.

hes just explaining his prob omg

beenhurtingfo wrote:
haha standby, that must be it, that seriously made my day

what?

Well then, i’m glad your feeling a little better :D

okay girls go to the a hole because some of act like guys u know just wanna hit it and quit so we find guys we just wanna hit it and quit it too and ur not that type this happens at parties

aaww i feel good that i made u feel good haha life is so great

when ur around happy people right?

i suggest u play it cool in front a girl dont break a sweat u seem really sweet

haha guess u cant handle me im either really happy really pist or mellow

Wow, to give advice on girls…. dating is like public speaking or sports. You always can learn and get better at it. You just have to stop over thinking everything. From my own personal experience over thinking a situation is the worst thing to do. It gets your emotions higher, you’re nerves higher, and you can’t think as clearly.

That’s why I enjoy being a little buzzed before I go out or I meet girls at bars. Just the alcohol keeps me from thinking negative thoughts about myself or the situation and I just do and when you just do things you’re comfortable and that’s when you’re being yourself. An example like public speaking, the more you speak in front of an audience the less you’re worried about everything. Like if you misspeak all of a sudden you panic like OMG they think I’m retarded… and if you do a lot of speeches a mistake is not a big deal. You just recover and don’t think about it.

Anyways from what you’re saying seems to me you just have some confidence issues, and by confidence I just mean that you’re being down on yourself, and like mentioned above you’re over thinking it. Like how you said you started and had great conversation with that girl, you were probably like “does she like me, is she into me, etc” and that kind of worrying just makes you act differently than if you just were talking to her. Also did you show an intent? I mean did she know you were into her, that makes a big difference. Are you talking to talk or talking because you’d like to take her out?

Good luck man, just don’t get yourself into a funk. They are hard to get out of. I have been there and you can get so down on yourself so you think you’re worthless and you just half *** talk to girls because you already are prepared to be rejected. It’s just dumb everyone has something to bring to the table.