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I need to help my friend..any advise on this situation?
I am 17 years and I live with my father, I have a very close friend who is 18 and lives with her parents and sister. Her parents are both HIGHLY protective of her because of situations that happened early in her life that they feel guilty about not preventing and her sister is very annoying and back stabbing. It has pushed my friend to her limits because every little thing she does she (and her sister) get told is wrong…”what you need to do/should have done/gotta do next time is….” and the “….” is always dumb and not true. My friend is always beat down by her mother’s insecurity’s and trust issues and I keep watching it hurt her worse and worse as her mother goes through the beginning of empty nest syndrome.
An Instance:
My friend went to an interview and when it was over she came to her mom and I running and said “I got the job!”. the very first thing to come out of her mothers mouth was “not yet you dont- you dont know if you done got anything until I look at everything.” and then she was telling her mom and me about the job and it was a sales rep job where the people made appointments and my friend went to their house to talk to them about the products (when on the phone asking about the job they told her the people were to come to the store and view the products at their appointment time). My friend said this to her mom and her mother instantly began saying “no ,you ain’t gonna do that I told you…blah blah..” and my friends head was just pumped with negativity. I understand where her mother was coming from and was not personalty happy about the idea of her going to multiple strangers houses. and I believe she understood as well and was nervous about it. however she did not receive any form of congratulations and her mother spent the next 2 hours lecturing her about why and making her feel stupid and insignificant. Her mother at one point even said “Don’t feel special, they hire anyone that goes in there. They don’t care about you they just want more people so they can get more sales.”
It is killing me to watch my best friend get beat up like this and I don’t know what to do! she is not able to move in with me and my dad right now because of my parents divorce.
She has a Car/License/Cell phone—all of which are held over her head like Popsicle sticks to a marionette puppet. Her phone has to be on the table in the kitchen at 9:30PM every single night unless she is at a friends for the night or is out later then that-in which case she is to set it on the table the instant she walks in the door……..and..she is 18 years old.
One other this about the mother is she has serious control issues other then what you have already read. Whenever I ask “Can we do_______.” it comes back “No, but how about instead you guys _____.” and the simple thing of it is that she mearly wants to be the one who has the say.
She does not have the money to by a card board box right now because she does not have a job, however I am scared that right when she does have enough money to rent something small she is going to do it and not have enough to fully make it on her own.
Does anyone have any advice for my on how to help her or what she needs to do?
This open post was written 3 months, 4 weeks ago | V/U/S: 81, 2, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post
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