Love help: Ok so anytime I pretty much ever talk to a guy or date them, - Help.com

How old are you?

If you see the same behaviour over and over… you are dating the same kind of guy.

If you want something different, you need to sit down and work out a list of all the things the guys you have dated have in common. Then look for something different.

For instance, I found myself dating perfectionists for awhile. When I realized that, I stopped and looked for someone different. I attracted them because I seemed so calm. Perfectionists suffer from a lot of anxiety.

Find out what you are dating, then change it.

Love is an extremely strong emotion that someone couldn’t feel after only 3 days of being with a person. Maybe they are extremely infatuated with you, but not in love. Maybe you are just dating some immature guys who just don’t know what love is. How old are you if you don’t mind me asking.

Well you must exude intense femininity to cause that reaction in any kind of guy!

It really does sound like the guys haven’t had much experience. But hey, why not enjoy the intensity? The issue isn’t really what they say, it’s your own discomfort in being put on a pedestal where you feel uncomfortable being human, right?

So the thing to do is be really REALLY human around guys. If that means passing gas, telling off-colour jokes, having a stained shirt, then maybe that’s the thing to do. Make sure YOU feel comfortable.

I used to always be pegged a certain way. So I really changed my behaviour to be sillier and loosen up. I attracted someone who liked that a lot and I didn’t feel any pressure.

I’ve had a girlfriend of me tell me I was perfect before… It made me feel pretty weird because I know as well as anyone that I’m not perfect. I feel like, as I said before, that its a sign of immaturity for a guy to tell you they love you that early on in a relationship. But like linuxya said, maybe just try and enjoy their intensity while staying level headed yourself.

When I say you are perfect, I am talking about my fantasy of you.

The key is to disrupt that fantasy with being really human. If they persist in all this perfection talk, then discuss things that really matter to you and get them to share their opinions too. If someone says you are amazing then keep digging deeper to find out if the two of you are compatible.

Don’t get caught up in the superficial crushes. Keep talking, asking, discussing, doing stuff that challenges them and you and shows what you are both like when dealing with challenging situations and controversial topics.

I’m surprised nobody asked you. what was the reason why your they broke up with your previous boyfriends.

So it sounds like the real problem is you feel like they say you are perfect and then things fall apart. So the real issue is how you have your expectations built up and then they crash and shatter.

The real issue then is something you control because it’s inside you. You don’t have to harden yourself (like some girls do) all you have to do is recognize this is crush talk and the thing to do is move things along by doing lots of stuff together and talking about lots of things.

Enjoy every relationship for what it brings you and you’ll have more fun. DOn’t worry about finding the one perfect guy for you. Just accept this is how it goes and practice your dating skills… which is the stuff I mentioned above. Focus on having fun and getting to know the guy and if it goes further, enjoy the surprise.

Then sunshine you need to find out what this is. You already are starting to wonder hmmm… I already heard this before why should I trust your words. As time progress. You will simply not trust a word a man says because you heard it all or seen it all… This is bad because, thinking like that a real nice guy may pass by and you won’t give him the time of day. Reason because of your previous relationships…

Write down why you fell out of love or there reason they fell out of love with you. Right down the characteristic traits and what they did. Compare them to see if you actually did date another type? For Instance did you really ever date a compulsive cleaner? Just kidding but hopefully you get my point.

To the other posters I don’t believe yeah just experience and enjoy every relationship. Until you find that one maybe. IF they where that type to begin with. They wouldn’t be on help.com…. be a little more sensitive please

One. what attracted you them and visa versa?
Two. how long did you know them before you started a relationship with them?
three. How long did the relationship last?

guys r stupid ok if they say they love u too early ( within the first week) they usually dnt mean it i dnt want u to get hurt im just giving u a heads up but idk them so i cant really speak for them. im a guy and the first time i said i loved a girl was a month after we started going out and tht realtionship lasted over a yr.

most important thing is not to give them waht they want ok make them prove to u they really mean it and tht’ll make things much easier. If they say they love u say ok and see waht they do, if they seem sad then make them work to really prove it, if they seem fine they dnt mean it at all.

i hope this helps

What he needs to do is show you that he loves you, but honestly it is waaaaay too soon. Either he is confusing love for really like or he’s lying to you…sorry to say but some guys will say and do nothing to you just to get what they want, and won’t care if they hurt you, those are assholes. So please be careful nothing is wrong with you. And dontsay i love you back when u really dont mean it,take it slow, just talk to him about what ive told u

perfect is relative they might be meaning that you are a perfect fit in their lives and they love the comfort of that. Not that you are a deity.