today i take my first baby step..

Aixa

today i take my first baby step..

I don’t know if its that i want to see my reaction or hers towards me.. both.. tonight if the first night in a long time that i see my mother. we don’t really talk much because we have a dark past. my siblings are obligated to spend time with her.. and since this is their first night out with her without the doctor.. i thought i would like to go.. so the plans are made and everyone is rushing home in the next two hours to rush to the movies to meet our mother.. and the truth is.. i don’t think i’m ready… i don’t think i want to see her face.. i don’t want to look into her eyes.. i don’t want to hear her say i missed you or i love you.. i don’t even want to speak to her. i am not even sure why i want to be there anymore.. or how bad this will hurt me after.. all i know is that i’m going.. part of me is pulling me to go.. and my other half is begging me not to.

This open post was written 3 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 83, 4, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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linuxya 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 months, 3 weeks ago (3 minutes after post)

Every time you do something despite the fear, you become more courageous in the rest of your life.

Every time you reach out to someone despite the risk, you become a more confident and empathic human.

Help me with: The problem with self serving advice

SayItsSo 13 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 months, 3 weeks ago (5 minutes after post)

GOOD JOB!!

Help me with: HALP!

zeleto6 3 #
An Unknown Location | 3 months, 3 weeks ago (33 minutes after post)

Not sure what brought on the DARK PAST,but be careful and if it becomes TOO MUCH,then remove yourself without negitive words…GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS !!!

Help me with: Listen,,,And listen well !

Barbyman 5 #
An Unknown Location | 3 months, 3 weeks ago (39 minutes after post)

Same here>> I dont know what happned ,but i would NOT go .

Help me with: Wife deleted , “not me ” Office and some thing else with it .Now i can’t delete or set up a fresh program

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today i take my first baby step.. - Help.com