Love help: My boyfriend doesn’t have sex with me very often, he watches porn instead and I’ve talked to him and nothing changes. - Help.com

try to get him excitied sexually, ask if he would like to do what is going on in the porn that he is watching. see if that works for you.

Leave him. Porn is gross.

Here’s my opinion and I’m a guy.. sorry, but it sounds like he’s got issues. Apparently, if he doesn’t have any interest in it now, with time, it will only get worse. Also, that should worry you that he could easily cheat on you as well.. that being said, I assumed you have open/honest communication with him. If you haven’t had open/honest communication with him regarding your needs, I strongly recommend that you do that before making any decisions. Good luck!

i wouldnt necessarily generalize like that and say that anyone who watches porn is also likely to cheat but

the fact that he doesnt have sex with u often is not normal behaviour in a functioning relationship.. im assuming u havent been together for a long time..

have u asked him why he does that?
if he loves u and if hes attracted to u the only reason i can think of is that
he is soo used to porn, kinda like an addiction that he cant go without it

but i dont know your boyfriend..
does he flirt with other girls.. does seem like he is sexually attracted to u?
what kind of porn does he watch?
maybe he is into something particular and hes scared to ask u ?

I would say he has an addiction.
Leave him - it will only get worse. He has to realise that he has a problem.
Plus - the over use of pornography has serious consequences to that persons mental health.

Pornography is all about bodies, and about women as sex toys. There is so much more to life and love than that petty, nasty stuff! Find a real man who has some depth.

I kind of like porn. I think I’m normal. I still respect woman. I know that it is not for everyone my wife hates that I look at it but she tells me she has never had better sex. I don’t see women as toys at all, I love everything about them.
I also think it doesn’t cause mental problems, some people might have had that before they looked at porn. after all I work with litte girls & I look at them like they are little girls…This is just my opinion please don’t hate on me for being happy

‘I also think it doesn’t cause mental problems’

I don’t judge anyone who uses it (at all!) - as a female, I use it too, BUT the OVER use of pornography does cause mental problems. There have been (many) studies to prove so.

Let me just clarify that using it in moderation is perfectly fine and everything - but once someone is addicted or becoming reliant/addicted to it it will cause problems that require serious help to get past. It also depends on the person and their genetic make-up as to how it affects them.

I can’t disagree with you anony. Back to the post, He must be getting off somewhere? maybe by himself? Do you love him?

i have a similar situation……

I just wish porn never existed. Maybe couples would spend more time in the bedroom figuring out what pleases their partner sexually and better open communication. Sex isn’t just about getting off, its about sharing an intimate experience. And I know men won’t agree with me but if you ask grandparents and older people how they lived without porn they will answer why do I need porn I have my wife. And another problem is a lot of women are not cumming and I think this is largely due to the fact that men watch porn and think that what this girl wants is what his women will want instead of giving the women the emotional connection she needs to climax. SOOOOO many women have to fake it. SOOOOOO not fair. Its true men have hand computer connections while the women are missing out on healthy sexual intimacy with their partner. They feel that have to live up to what the women do on porn sights. Thats puts pressure on women and you know as soon as a women gets mental about anything she can’t cum. The most important thing is that you make your partner comfortable sexually so they can open up, put down the porn and be intimate with your partner it can be more rewarding watching your girl get off truly for the first time instead of having to fake it. When women can actually cum they become way more frisky they know what they like and feel comfortable to do the crazy positions and try new things. I’m really mad at my boyfriend right now he never really watches porn but the other day he told me he was sick hungover and to tired to have sex and when I came home there was porn on his computer history. WTF I have even made porn for him. Why does he need to watch that????? UGHHHHH so frustrating for a women

It’s the same with me now me and my boyfriend have been together 10months now hes much older than me hes 41 and im 23 everything is perfect except the sex i have a very high sex drive and want it all the time but we only have sex like once a week if im lucky and for the past month we havnt had any he says its down to stress with work as he run his own company which i can understand. But hes been wanking aswell! i know this is gonna sound disgusting but as i do all the washing i see all the left overs in his boxers it really hurts me that he’d rather have a wank then have sex with me i really wanna talk to him about but im scared he will finish with me i love him so much. i was in tears lastnight just thinking about it i hardly slept one bit. i mean i masturbate aswell but only because i aint getting any whats his excuss? When i texted him i asked him if it was something to do with me does he find it boring and he said it wasnt me i don’t know what to think its driving me mad can someone help me understand why hes doing this ???

Are you still with him? I have a very similar situation. I don’t get it either.
This is

michellebird4 wrote:
It’s the same with me now me and my boyfriend have been together 10months now hes much older than me hes 41 and im 23 everything is perfect except the sex i have a very high sex drive and want it all the time but we only have sex like once a week if im lucky and for the past month we havnt had any he says its down to stress with work as he run his own company which i can understand. But hes been wanking aswell! i know this is gonna sound disgusting but as i do all the washing i see all the left overs in his boxers it really hurts me that he’d rather have a wank then have sex with me i really wanna talk to him about but im scared he will finish with me i love him so much. i was in tears lastnight just thinking about it i hardly slept one bit. i mean i masturbate aswell but only because i aint getting any whats his excuss? When i texted him i asked him if it was something to do with me does he find it boring and he said it wasnt me i don’t know what to think its driving me mad can someone help me understand why hes doing this ???

I finally am done with him. The porn wasn’t his only problem. When you have to download an app to hide specific text messages…I can’t put up with that. He’s 40. Grow up people! Sorry had to vent. Hoping God has better plans for me.

Same old same old, mine says he just does not need sex as often as I do, and is happy to have it once every two month, he says he is in love with me and has proposed, but he always has porn sites on his phone, I have tried everything from watching it with him to watching it by myself, but nothing changes his behaviour. I would have no problem with it, if we had a good ex life but as it is now I feel like the porn is replacing our time in the bed room, we have discussed it to death but nothing changes. He is very affectionate in all other ways like holding hands and cuddling but won’t go near the key areas like butt and boobs. And never kisses me deeply anymore but gives plenty normal kisses, it is just sooooo confusing to me, plus even when we do have ex it is only about him, I usually have to finish myself off. We are so close in every other area, all I want is that completeness. Guys please help me figure my man out !!!